Contents

       Cover

       Title page

       Copyright

       6 Danger

       7 Silence

       8 Happy birthday

       9 Living again

       10 ‘Do you really think you can just go?’

       11 Crystal clear

       Moving memoirs eNewsletter

       About the publisher

Chapter 6

       Danger

      December 2009–July 2010

      Christopher was furious about how things had panned out, and wasn’t going to let anything lie. The emails and messages continued, and I couldn’t settle. There was always a knot of worry in my stomach and I wasted far too much time wishing I’d never set eyes on him.

      One night, I fell asleep on the sofa, exhausted by stress more than anything, much more than by the pregnancy. I don’t think I’d been asleep more than five minutes when I felt Vic shaking my arm.

      ‘Wake up, Megan,’ he whispered. ‘Stay quiet.’

      My eyes were open in a second. They felt gritty and heavy, but the tone of Vic’s voice made me instantly realise that I couldn’t wallow in sleepiness.

      ‘What’s wrong?’ I hissed.

      ‘Someone’s outside. Get upstairs. Turn all the lights off. And hide. Get Ruby and hide. Don’t phone the police.’

      ‘Are you sure? Are you sure someone’s outside?’ I asked.

      ‘Of course I’m sure. I’ve been sitting here watching over you while you slept and I heard someone. Someone’s in the garden. They’ve been pacing around, checking the doors, so you just get upstairs, get Ruby and hide. I’ll deal with this.’

      Ruby’s room was on the top floor so I went up there, quickly but quietly. If Vic had heard someone outside, I had no reason to linger downstairs with something bad maybe about to happen. I sat outside Ruby’s room in case anyone did get past him and came into the house; I’d protect Ruby to my last breath if I had to.

      Vic had gone outside, to chase whoever was out there, but I could tell by the wind that he had left the back door open. I heard him shouting and was now terrified – I expected to hear someone come back in the house at any second; I just wouldn’t know who it would be. Sitting on the stairs, in the dark, fully prepared to hurt anyone who came near my child, pregnant and terrified – I wondered how my life had turned into a horror story. I wanted to call the police, I desperately wanted to call them, but he’d told me not to and I had to trust him. I sat there in the pitch black terrified for Ruby, for me, my unborn baby and for Vic, who had disappeared into the garden to find out who was there. I was sure it was my ex, or someone sent by my ex. I sat there absolutely petrified for what felt like an age, knowing that the back door was open, so if there was an altercation and Vic came off worse, then whoever was in the garden could come into the house and I would have no way of protecting myself or Ruby.

      My heart was pounding by the time I heard the door bang and Vic’s voice shout, ‘Megan! It’s fine! All sorted!’

      I belted down the stairs and threw myself into his arms. He was out of breath but seemed to be pumped up on adrenalin rather than fear.

      ‘What happened? My God, Vic, what happened out there?’ I asked.

      He was breathing heavily as he told me. ‘When I got out to the garden, whoever it was ran down to the bottom. They got out of the gate and I chased him up the hill into the village. I managed to catch him there and … well, let’s just say he’ll be sorry he messed with me.’

      ‘You hit him?’

      Vic nodded. ‘Of course I did. He was on my turf, Megan. Decking him was a lot less than I wanted to do.’

      ‘Where is he? Where did he go?’ I asked, then, ‘Vic – who was it?’

      ‘There was a car waiting for him – it must have all been set up, it wasn’t just someone chancing their luck as they went past. It was no bog-standard burglar