The Secret Love of a Gentleman. Jane Lark
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on the wooden floor.
Caro walked beside Mary. But then Rob appeared at her other side and gently braced her elbow.
She was used to his touch now. He often held out his arm or his hand for her to take, they’d taken three early-morning rides together in the last week, and when they did he would hold his joined hands in a step for her to mount—and grip her waist to lift her down when they returned.
He leant to her ear and whispered. “I cannot understand what you are so afraid of. It is just a little country dance. Come, and do not dance. I understand you do not like to be touched by strangers, but you might enjoy the company and conversation. Be brave, Caro. I know you are…”
“Rob…” she sighed, willing him to stop pleading.
“You trust me now. You trust Drew and Mary. We would not allow you to feel threatened. If you do, then I will bring you home. I’ll even take my own curricle, if you wish, so you may leave at any time.”
“You do not understand.” She stopped and turned to face him, freeing herself from the distracting grip on her arm.
Drew and Mary walked on.
“I understand that you keep yourself shut in here like a prisoner. You should break out.”
Neither Drew nor Mary looked back, leaving them to talk. At first Drew had raised his eyebrows on occasion, when Caro had become more relaxed with Rob, but now it had become commonplace.
“You will come, Caro?” Rob’s fingers touched her cheek and turned her gaze to him.
“No.”
His thumb brushed the edge of her lips accidently.
Like the first time she’d taken his bare hand and the first time he’d held her waist when he’d lifted her down from a horse, a sudden jolt lanced through her body. She knew what it was – desire. It was the feeling she had learned in her marriage bed, and when she looked at Rob she felt it. He was too beautiful.
“Will you come for my sake?” he asked, his dark eyes glinting in the light of the single candelabra that stood on a cabinet behind her. “You have immense courage. Remember it.” His breath caressed her lips. He was so close.
Her gaze held his. His eyes were reassuring, confident and encouraging.
She looked at his lips. She wished to lift to her toes and press her lips against his; there was something invisible within her pulling her to do so. She had imagined it often, ever since they’d crossed the stream, when he’d carried George, and she had thought she’d seen the same pull in his eyes.
That look she’d seen in his eyes then was not there now. She’d thought it desire too, and yet, she wondered if she’d imagined it. She had not seen it in his eyes since, only this open look of like and care.
He was inviting her because he cared…
The thought stirred places in her soul, as his touch moved her physically.
She should go. She should stop locking herself away in her glass gaol, Do I have the courage?
Her gaze clung to his. “I will go,” for your sake. The last words erupted from somewhere within her, but she did not say them. They were foolish, yet true. She wished to be in his company.
His gaze seemed to delve into her.
“Caro! Rob! Are you coming? We’ve dealt already.” Drew’s voice stretched back into the hall, echoing about the stairwell.
Rob smiled, cheerfully. There was a charm in his smile and it caught like a stitch in her middle when his hand fell away. “That is settled, then.” He cupped her elbow. “Come along, let’s tell Drew.”
She took a deep breath. What had she just agreed to?
When they reached the drawing room, he let go of her. “Caro is coming to the assembly. I have persuaded her.”
Drew looked up, his mouth open and his eyebrows lifting. But he said nothing.
For years Drew had encouraged her to broaden her horizons. He would be happy that she was going.
Mary stood. “Oh, I am so glad. We will have fun.” She gave Caro a sisterly embrace, full of excitement.
~
The assembly rooms in Maidstone were above the coaching inn, and the area before it tonight was full of carriages when they arrived. They were late because Caro had delayed coming down from her rooms.
Rob had been kicking his heels in the hall for nearly an hour, wondering if he ought to go up. But in the end she’d appeared on the stairs, and he’d had to stop himself from staring as she walked down the last flight.
He’d never seen her in a ball gown. He’d never seen her attend a dance, so of course he had not… But she’d found a dress, or perhaps borrowed one of Mary’s. It was teal. The colour set off her golden hair, and as she came closer he noted how well it caught against the colour of her eyes too. The little amber cross necklace she wore rested in the cleft between her breasts.
“You look beautiful,” he’d said, and he would have offered his arm, but Drew offered his first, so instead Rob had escorted Mary to the carriage.
A footman opened the carriage door. Drew climbed out and offered his hand to Mary to help her down. Then Drew held his hand out to help Caro. Her shawl slipped from her shoulder a little as she left Rob in the carriage. Her hand was shaking when she pulled her shawl back up. She breathed in deeply as she took Drew’s hand and climbed down, and breathed out as her foot touched the ground.
When Rob climbed out, he heard Caro’s next shaky intake of air.
She’d been sitting with her head lowered throughout their journey, her bosom lifting and falling with her measured breaths. He’d presumed she’d been fighting her fear, yet now it seemed to be overwhelming her.
When Drew let go of her hand, Rob took it and set her fingers on his bent arm, then pressed his hand over hers. She was shaking and her gaze darted about the carriages and people.
“We are beside you,” Rob whispered. Drew looked sideways at them as Mary rested her hand on his arm.
“Caro,” Drew encouraged them to walk ahead.
Caro shook her head. “You lead.”
“Caro…” Drew’s voice expressed concern. It was clear she was not comfortable.
“We will follow you,” Rob answered for her.
Drew had commented, only two days ago, on how much Caro had changed, how relaxed she was in Rob’s company. Rob had given Drew the same explanation he’d given Caro—it was probably due to him having so many sisters.
It said a great deal, though, that tonight she accepted his support—and she’d only come because he’d urged her. They had grown close. They were friends. He’d had a desire to see her laugh, and he’d achieved that weeks ago, but he still now longed to see her dance even more than he had at the beginning of the summer. Then it had been a fascinating concept. Now he wished his friend to be able to do as she pleased. To enjoy herself.
Pride swelled in his chest, on her behalf, because she had come this far, and yet he wished her to take more steps.
Drew walked ahead with Mary.
Rob’s hand pressed over Caro’s, urging her to keep going as they followed.
Caro’s fingers curved on his arm, grasping, as they stepped over the threshold of the inn.
“Upstairs, my lord, my lady, sir, ma’am.” The doorman directed them to the stairs.
Caro’s breathing fractured into short, sharp sounds.
Damn propriety. If others judged, they could go to hell. Rob let his arm fall and clasped her hand in his instead, willing her to be brave as they began