Chapter One

      WATCHING Jem slowly recover his strength was both a joy and a relief, but unbelievably draining.

      Every hour brought further progress—sitting up in bed, then sitting out, then standing for a moment on his right leg as he swivelled onto the chair for himself. It was like watching a time-lapse sequence of a baby turning into a toddler, but Kate was more than happy to sit through it. She was looking forward to seeing him walk again, to seeing him run, but for now, she was just glad he was alive and making progress.

      And to know she’d be going home to the barn every night with Nick. She felt that if she pinched herself, she’d wake up and find it was all a dream, and the thought was frightening.

      They’d moved in last night, collecting just enough clothes and linen to see them over the next few days, and then he’d cooked for her—not Ben’s chilli, but a cold chicken and ham pie from the farm shop, with a lovely fresh salad and boiled new potatoes, followed by some utterly delectable honey and ginger ice cream made on the farm.

      And they’d talked about telling Jem. Today. Later, after Nick arrived. He was at the surgery now, doing a clinic and seeing a few patients, and then he was coming over and they were going to tell him.

      Somehow. She still had no idea how.

      She went for a walk up the corridor to see Gemma and her baby while they took out Jem’s catheter, to his relief, and then they moved him to the ward downstairs, which was for the children who were on the mend; it had access on one side to a courtyard with seats and toys and lots of things to look at, and on the other side, right near his bed, was the courtyard with the ducklings.

      Five of them, they finally concluded, watching them peck about amongst the moss and bark chips, brown and yellow and fluffy and very cute. They watched them for ages, until at last the mother tucked them back under her wings for a rest, and he went back to his games console.

      He was allowed other visitors now, and the first people to come in the afternoon were Rob and Matthew.

      The boys had plenty to talk about and they left them to it. Rob took her hand and squeezed it fleetingly. ‘How are you? It must have been hell—have you coped OK?’

      She nodded. ‘Yes. It’s been pretty awful, but Nick’s been great. Rob—there’s something you need to know.’

      He shook his head and smiled. ‘I know already—I can see it in your eyes, and I’m really pleased for you. You go for it. I know how you feel. Your heart will never really belong to anybody else, just as mine won’t, but at least you’ve now got that chance, and you have to take it.’ He glanced at Jem, his head close to Matt’s, bent over the games console. ‘Does Jem know yet?’ he asked softly.

      ‘The paternity thing?’ she murmured. ‘No. Or about Nick and me. That’s so new I’m not sure I know about it, really.’

      He smiled. ‘I think Jem will be fine with it once he’s used to the idea. Is there anything I can do, anything I can get you?’

      She shook her head. ‘No. Just bring Matt to see him sometimes. He’s going to be horribly bored. Oh, and we’ve taken a rented barn up near the Trevellyans’ farm, with some bedrooms and a shower room on the ground floor, in case he can’t manage stairs for a while. I’ll give you the directions. Matt can come and stay later on, if you like. It’ll give Jem something to look forward to when he comes out.’

      ‘That would be really nice. Look, is Nick all right about this? He does realise I’m just bringing Matt to see Jem?’

      ‘Yes, he does. And he’s fine with it. He likes you.’

      Rob laughed softly. ‘That’s good of him. I’m not sure I’d be so generous in his shoes. I hope you can make this work.’

      So did she, but they still had the hurdle of the great reveal, as she was beginning to call it in her head, and she couldn’t really think past that.

      They didn’t stay long, and Nick appeared soon afterwards. She wondered if he’d been lurking somewhere, waiting until the coast was clear, giving them space.

      She didn’t know. He’d been a little odd with her that morning, maybe because of the barn and being there alone together. She’d gone to bed early, closing her door quite firmly, and he’d gone up a short while later. She’d seen his light come on, seen it go off shortly afterwards, and she wondered if he’d slept as well as her. They were both tired, both drained, and he’d looked better at breakfast, but he’d been quiet, a little distracted.

      ‘So, how’s it going?’ he asked Jem. ‘Worked your way up another level yet?’

      ‘My battery’s flat again,’ he said. ‘I had to ask the nurses upstairs to charge it, but I don’t know any of the nurses down here so I don’t know who to ask.’

      ‘I can charge it for you,’ he said. ‘We’ve got to go soon—we’re going to pick Bruno up from Chloe and take him back to the barn and settle him in, so it can be charging while we do that and we can bring it back this evening.’

      ‘Great—and then can we do the face thing on it, Uncle Nick?’

      ‘Yes, I’m sure we can,’ he said, and there was a flicker of emotion in his eyes, just as there always was when Jem called him that. And Kate got a stupid lump in her throat, just as she always did. But maybe not for much longer. She felt a shiver of dread, and stifled it. It would be fine. It would.

      He found the charger in the locker, and packed it up with the console and put it in her bag, and they went back to the barn, put it on charge and collected Bruno. He was so excited to see her, she thought the young dog was going to wag his tail right off, and her eyes filled with tears.

      ‘Oh, sweetheart, have you missed me? I’m so sorry,’ she said, getting down on the floor with him and hugging him, but he was too excited, and bounced around barking, and Chloe laughed and let him out into the garden so he could race round like a lunatic and have a mad five minutes with Chloe and Oliver’s little bitch from the same litter of flat-coated retriever puppies.

      ‘It’s been a bit hectic on the puppy-sitting front this last week,’ Chloe admitted when Kate thanked her yet again for her kindness. ‘I haven’t even had time to see Gemma yet—how’s the baby?’

      Kate smiled. ‘Gorgeous. He’s absolutely gorgeous. I had the nicest cuddle yesterday morning. One of the advantages of being a midwife—I can pull rank and sneak in outside visiting hours! But they were coming home today, so you should be able to pop over