Chapter One

      The harsh, north-east wind whistled through the gap underneath the door of my shop, and it was at that exact moment that I questioned my reasoning for booking a winter holiday somewhere even colder than the country I actually lived in.

      ‘You could’ve picked somewhere like Tenerife,’ Kat said, almost reading my mind as she settled herself down on the pale-green wicker chair beside the counter at the back of my small but cosy gift shop in the little north-east-English coastal town of Tynemouth. ‘Y’know, a country where you don’t have to put on three layers of clothes just to pop to the pub,’ she went on, picking up a packet of joss sticks from the shelf behind her and examining it closely. ‘I mean, why Lapland, Jess?’

      I was actually quite tired of explaining exactly why I’d chosen Finnish Lapland to take my first holiday in a long time – my first holiday since the events of last Christmas that had seen my life change in an instant and my whole way of thinking about things turned completely on its head.

      ‘You know I’ve always wanted to go there, Kat.’ And I had. I just hadn’t expected it to be under these circumstances. ‘You know we’d both always wanted to go there.’

      Kat frowned as she looked at me, accepting the cup of tea I held out to her, putting the joss sticks back down on the shelf.

      I leant back against the counter and took a sip of tea, quickly glancing outside at the driving rain that was beating hard against the windows. Despite the wind whistling through the gap in my door it was still cosy and reasonably warm in my lovely little shop, the smell of incense and burning candles creating a wonderfully welcoming atmosphere. I loved my shop – Rainbows – smack bang in the village centre. I’d run it for over fifteen years now, and although it hadn’t exactly made me into anything even remotely resembling a millionaire, it gave me a comfortable and enjoyable way of earning an income. Selling everything from candles to home-crafted gifts, jewellery and cards, clothing and accessories, and even local souvenirs, it was my haven. My escape. Now more so than ever.

      ‘It’s Christmas, though, Jess.’ Kat’s voice broke into my thoughts, tearing me away from the memories I’d been about to dredge up all over again. ‘Don’t you want to spend Christmas with your mum and dad?’

      I closed my eyes for a second, sighing probably a touch too heavily, but I really thought I’d explained this to everyone. Countless times. I thought they’d all got it by now.

      ‘Kat, believe me, I love them to bits, I really do. And I know they mean well, but, I just can’t do it. I need to get away, y’know? To sort things out in my own head without everybody else around me throwing in their own two-penny’s-worth. I think it’s about time I started doing that, don’t you?’

      Kat sat forward in the chair, looking at me with those same concerned eyes that people had