Make sure to take care of the physical basics: sleep and nutrition. Stress drains energy, including motivation, and you need to replenish your body and mind often.

       Build strong coping skills. There are always going to be stressors in your life, but the most important thing is to have the tools to cope with them. The more tools you have, the less energy drain will occur and the less impact on your motivation level. We discuss mental health issues in Chapter 13. You can use the various skills we cover in this book (imagery, confidence building, goal setting, focus, bouncing back from mistakes, and so on) to cope better with life off the playing field as well. Don’t limit their use to sports alone.

       Talk to a sports psychologist about the reasons why your life is out of balance. They can help you get it back.

       Focus on task management. Your life may be out of balance because you’re overextended and not managing your time and priorities well. If you can get a handle on your schedule, you can prevent decreases in motivation that come with feeling overwhelmed. (For more on task management, turn to Chapter 9.)

       If there is a conflict, address it as soon as possible. Holding onto anger, resentment, and bitterness, or simply being confused about why the conflict exists, drains your physical and mental energy and depletes your motivation.

       Keep your focus on your own attitude and what you want to communicate. Differences in opinions and personality styles are part of life. Focus on getting better as an athlete, and those conflicts won’t hurt your motivation.

       Try to understand the other person’s point of view first. You already know where you’re coming from — if you understand how the other person feels, you’ll be closer to resolving the conflict and moving on.

       When you’re in conflict with a coach, remember that you’re ultimately in a one-down position. The coach is the final judge and jury. Convey your opinion, but keep in mind that the coach’s opinion takes priority.

       Try not to take anything personally. Although not taking things personally may seem impossible, you can do it. You may not like the behaviors or decisions of a coach or teammate, but you can choose to take it personally or to see it as unrelated to who you are as a person.

       Consider the fit of the coach and/or team. You may have to consider whether there are too many differences to remain on the team, at that school, or playing under that coach. Try to address your differences before you walk away. But if you’re going to face a constant drain on your motivation by playing on this team under this coach, leaving may be the best choice.