The Marked Men Series Books 1–6: Rule, Jet, Rome, Nash, Rowdy, Asa. Jay Crownover
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How’s that going to work with things between you and Margot?
Not just me, you’re coming, too.
I’m not worried about me.
Rome seems to think that since he’s shipping back out she’ll behave if he asks her to, but I have my doubts. He thinks if we do it someplace public she’ll behave.
It’s so sad you guys even have to worry about that in the first place.
Not the only one with family problems, Casper.
No, you’re not.
Have a good night.
There was a long pause and I didn’t think she was going to say anything back but after about five minutes my phone beeped with a new message.
I miss you, Rule.
I didn’t know what to say to that because I wasn’t the one pulling away this time. I clicked the screen off and went back to my drawing.
The next night, I was the one blowing off spending time with Shaw because I decided it was a great idea to take Rome out and at least attempt to get him laid before he went back overseas. Somehow, I ended up facedown in a fifth of Crown, so I’m pretty sure I failed and ended up being the worst wingman ever. Rome and Nash dropped me on the bed after practically carrying me home. It wasn’t until well after eleven the next morning, when I was attempting to shower and fake being human enough to show for work, that I noticed I had three missed calls and five missed messages from Shaw. They were all variations on the same thing: Where are you? What are you doing? Why aren’t you answering? Should I come by? Are you going to come by? They all made me cringe and swear. I felt guilty as hell because had things not been so strained between us I would have called her before I left or asked her to come with us. Instead, I had enjoyed just being my normal self and not putting any effort into being anybody’s perfect anything.
I was about to try to call her to explain when Rome came out of the hallway bathroom running a towel over his head. “You alive?”
“Barely. I need to call Shaw. I was too messed up last night to let her know what was going on.”
He gave me a sharp look. “I already called her. She texted me last night wondering what you were up to so I told her you were loaded and out of control. She sounds sad, worse than that, she sounds sad because of you.”
I growled a little and rested my elbows on the kitchen counter. “I know but I don’t know what I did wrong. I almost beat her ex to death in a parking lot but realized if I was going to act like a caveman I was going to lose her and not be around to protect her. I’ve been minding all my p’s and q’s and, let me tell ya, I had no idea how many of those little fuckers there were. But ever since I started, she’s been acting like I cheated on her or did some other horrible thing.”
“Rule, she liked you just fine when your p’s and q’s were all over the map. Stop trying to be something you aren’t and just let her love you. It’s not hard. Dad called and dinner is tonight at Ruth’s Chris downtown at six. I already told Shaw, so unless you want to grovel and apologize, you don’t need to call her.”
“They’re coming here?”
“Dad thought it would be good for Mom. He thought maybe getting her out of Brookside would break some of that hold the past has on her.”
“I guess we’ll see.”
“Rule.” I turned to look at him and was struck by the sincerity in his eyes. “Thank you for doing this for me. I know it isn’t easy for you.”
“I’m learning easy things never really pay off. It’s the things that make you work that really matter.”
“You’re still a little punk who can’t hold his liquor, but somewhere along the line you really did turn into a man I’m proud to call my brother.”
We stared at each other for a long moment—and I would kill before I admitted it—but my eyes totally welled up. I cleared my throat and pushed off the counter.
“Thanks, Rome. Now I gotta go see if I still have a girlfriend or if I managed to drink myself single last night.”
I was thinking about his words as I dialed Shaw’s number only to be sent to voice mail. I just had to let her love me; I wasn’t sure how to go about that but I knew whatever I was doing now wasn’t working. After her recorded greeting I left a gruff message.
“Hey, it’s me. I suck and I’m sorry. I should have called. I’m sure you were worried and if you had pulled that shit with me, I would have been climbing the walls. Really, I don’t have an excuse other than things have been off with us for a little bit and I’m trying to figure it out. Call me when you get this if you want. I’ll see you later tonight. I’m really sorry and I promise to stop trying to do things different when the old way was working just fine.”
I didn’t know what her response was going to be, I only knew that I had screwed up and I hoped it wasn’t too late to fix it. I finished getting ready for work without hearing from her. I burned through my first two appointments with no word from Shaw and I was starting to worry. I knew she had class today, but that didn’t normally stop her from hitting me up between sessions. I was tempted to call her again, but worried what getting sent to voice mail again would do to me, since I was already hanging on by a thread. I was cleaning up my final appointment of the day when I finally got a text from her:
I’ll see you at dinner.
That’s was all. There was no “I forgive you,” no “Yes, you suck, now let’s kiss and make up,” no “Everybody makes mistakes,” no “I’m so glad we’re getting things back to normal,” just “I’ll see you at dinner.” What was I supposed to do with that? This having a girlfriend business was starting to make my head hurt and I longed for the days when we were cordial enemies who only spent a few hours a week together. That wasn’t remotely true, but it made me feel a little better as I plodded home and changed into something that wouldn’t give my mom a fit.
I put on gray Dickies and a button-down plaid shirt with pearl snaps on it and changed out my studded leather belt for a plain black one. I left my boots on and made sure my unruly hair had just enough product in it to keep it a semi-styled mess. I still looked like me, just a me that my dad wouldn’t razz and my mom wouldn’t bitch about. I had to admit that I wanted Shaw to see that I could clean it up when the occasion called for it, but my head was so twisted where she was concerned, I tried not to spend too much time thinking about what her reaction would be when we finally saw each other.
Rome and I climbed into the truck to head to dinner. I could tell he was nervous by his silence on the ride down to the restaurant and I honestly couldn’t blame him since the last family get-together had gone so smashingly. To date, Mom still didn’t believe that she held any responsibility for the family rift. I wasn’t sure that meeting in public and having all this extra tension between Shaw and me was going to be a recipe for success, but I was determined to give Rome the send-off he deserved, and not let him leave disappointed in me or with too many reasons to worry about those he loved.
We parked in a crowded lot and shoved a couple dollars in the payment kiosk. As we made our way to the busy restaurant, we could see Mom and Dad waiting out front with Shaw. My breath quickened and something in my chest flipped over at the sight of her. It had only been a few days, but seeing her now I suddenly felt like we had spent years apart. She had changed her hair in the time that had passed; it was now drastically two-toned and looked badass next to her pale skin and bright eyes. Her cheeks were red from the cold and her green eyes were guarded as we got close. I could see my mom had a near death grip on Shaw’s arm and that she wasn’t exactly overjoyed with our arrival. Rome leaned in and kissed both of them on the cheek and shook Dad’s hand before moving to pull open the door. I opted for a chin lift and a raised eyebrow in Shaw’s direction.
“Hey.”