The Complete Krondor’s Sons 2-Book Collection: Prince of the Blood, The King’s Buccaneer. Raymond E. Feist
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sighed and looked at the ground. ‘Because I am to be King?’
Kulgan nodded. ‘Precisely. You’re not as thick as I took you to be. You will marry for the good of the nation. Oh, you’ll have plenty of opportunity to satisfy itches with willing ladies of many ranks, no doubt. I know your uncle has given you at least a half a dozen cousins born on the wrong side of the blanket. Several of them will no doubt rise through the ranks of the nobility by the time it’s over with and done. But that’s not the same thing.
‘The King is very fond of the Queen, and from what I hear, she is an able confidant and wise counsellor, but she is still no more than a friend to him. Your uncle has to live every day of his life without that one special thing that your father, your aunt, and your uncle Martin were blessed with.
‘James has found the person whom the gods placed here to make his life complete. Don’t doubt for a moment that it was fated, and don’t think for a moment that he was taken unawares. What seems to you to be a hasty act of rash thoughtlessness is in fact a recognition of something so profound that only one who has known it can understand. The mind and logic have nothing to do with this; it is a thing of the heart and intuition. So, do you understand now?’
‘We should let him alone?’ said Erland.
‘Precisely,’ said Kulgan, pleased with himself. He smiled as he studied the Princes for a moment. ‘You know, you two are nowhere near the stupid pair of street thugs you resemble. Blood will tell after all, I guess. Now, you’ll most likely forget everything I’ve told you five minutes after you find an alehouse with a card game and a couple of amply endowed serving women looking to snag a rich gift from a young noble.
‘But with luck, at some critical time in your life, you will recall what I’ve said. It will help you make choices you must make, both of you, for the good of your nation.’
Borric shrugged. ‘It seems that the last few weeks have been dedicated to constantly reminding us of our duty.’
‘As it should be.’ Kulgan studied the boys. ‘You have been placed upon a high seat, Borric, and you one step below, Erland. You are not given all the power your rank carries for your simple pleasures and amusements. They come to you in payment for terrible sacrifices. Your grandfather made them, as did your uncle, and your father. I served with Lord Borric during the Riftwar and watched him order men into battle, knowing that many of them would not return. The ghosts of the many men who died under your grandfather’s command haunted his nights. As the ghosts of those who served your father haunt his nights. And while every one of those men died willingly in service to their King and Prince, still their deaths weigh heavily upon Arutha. That’s the sort of man your father is. You will come to know him better as you get older.’ Looking at Borric, he said, ‘And the day will come when you have to order men to go forth and die for the Isles, and unless you came into this world without a soul and heart, my young friend, your nights will be as haunted as your father’s and grandfather’s.’
Both brothers said nothing. At last Kulgan turned back toward the imposing edifice of Stardock. ‘It’s turning cool. I’ll find me a fire to warm myself next to. You go find whatever trouble you can.’ After he took a few steps, Kulgan halted, turned and said, ‘And be cautious of some of our fisher lads. Make free with their women and they’ll have their scaling knives out before they remember you’re royalty.’ He studied the twins’ faces a long moment, then added, ‘Take care of yourselves, boys.’
Borric and Erland watched the old magician head back to the entrance of the main building of the Academy, then resumed their walk to the ferry. As they came to the beach, Erland said, ‘What do you think?’
Borric said, ‘About what he said? I think he’s an old man with a lot of strange ideas.’
Erland nodded in agreement as they signalled to the ferryman they wished to cross to the beckoning lights of the distant town. While they waited, Borric turned and stared into the gloom at the doors where Kulgan had passed. For a brief moment he pondered the old magician’s words, and wondered if the reason he felt so uncomfortable with what Kulgan said was because he didn’t understand what Kulgan said, or because he did understand what Kulgan said.
The wind blew softly as Gamina and James walked along the shore, silently sharing the evening. James felt both invigorated and exhausted. In his thirty-seven years he had shared little of himself with anyone. True intimacy seemed impossible for him, but in Gamina he found someone able to break past previously unbreachable defences. No, it wasn’t that way, he amended silently to himself. She hadn’t broken past anything. She simply found the door waiting for her to open.
A scented breeze blew out of the south, the fragrance of distant orchards and fields in bloom across the Vale of Dreams. Middle moon rose in the east, a copper disc in the dark night approaching. James turned to his intended bride. He marvelled at the arch of her neck, the way her fine pale hair seemed to float about her face and shoulders, a nimbus of white tinged smoky grey in the twilight. Her pale eyes regarded him, then she smiled and his spirit leaped. ‘I love you,’ she said.
‘I love you,’ he said, not quite believing his own joy. ‘And I must leave you.’
She turned to watch the moon for a long moment, then her thoughts came to James. No, my love. My time here is over. I will journey to Kesh with you.
James gathered her into his arms. ‘It’s dangerous. Even for one of your gifts, there will be peril.’ He kissed her neck and felt her shiver slightly in response. ‘I would be more content within my mind with you safely here.’
Would you? she asked. I wonder … She stepped slightly away and studied his face in the fading light. ‘I fear you might retreat within yourself, Jimmy, and after a time you would convince yourself what we have found here was an illusion and those barriers against love and pain would then be restored, stronger, higher, and more firmly buttressed than ever before. You would find a reason to journey back to Krondor another way, and you would find reasons to postpone your return to Stardock. For a time you would convince yourself that you intended to come for me as soon as possible, but there would be one reason then another to keep you away. And always one reason or another to keep you from sending for me. After a time, you would simply put all this away from your heart and forget.’
James looked stung. Newly discovered feelings rampaged through him and his usual pose of relaxed confidence was absent. He looked nothing more than the boy he had never truly been, confused and disturbed by the loving attentions of a woman. ‘Do you think so little of me, after all?’
Touching his cheek, she smiled, and the warmth of her loving gaze swept away the fear again, as it had a dozen times during the day. Gamina had read James’s heart and soul when she had revived him upon the lakeshore and had shared herself with him, both her body and heart. Still, trust for James was grudgingly surrendered, even to the woman who had touched him as no other had. ‘No, love, I do not underestimate you. But I also do not underestimate fear. My talents are not just magic as others upon this island know it. My skills are also in healing the mind and heart. I can share things with those who are weakened in spirit and sick of mind, and help them, sometimes. I can listen to dreams. And I have seen what fear can do. You fear being left again as you were by your mother.’
James knew she was right. Even as she spoke, the feelings of that dreadful night returned, when as a child of six or seven he stole out of his mother’s crib, the stickiness upon the floor her blood, the horror of knowing only utter abandonment. Unbidden tears came to James’s eyes. Gamina gathered him into her arms and let him vent his pain. You will never be alone again, came her thoughts in his mind.
He stood motionless, holding her as if she were his only connection to life. And as it had before, the pain slipped away, leaving behind a tired but warm and relieved feeling. Something angry and festering within him for years had been lanced, and poisonous fear and loneliness were draining away. The wound wouldn’t heal in the space of a single day, or even many days, but in time it would heal and James of Krondor would be the better man for the healing. Her voice came to him as she said, And it is my fear speaking, as well. Doubt can make us all vulnerable.