A Last Kiss for Mummy: A teenage mum, a tiny infant, a desperate decision. Casey Watson
Читать онлайн книгу.
Instead she nodded. ‘It’s fine,’ she said. ‘I only came down to get a glass of water. If you want to play with him for a bit more, I don’t mind. I can finish our room off then, can’t I? You know, if you like.’
‘Oh, of course,’ I said, snuggling the baby back against my shoulder automatically. ‘He’s such a good little boy; no trouble at all. You get yourself a drink and get finished. Mike and I will mind him.’
‘Thanks,’ Emma said, disappearing into the kitchen to get her water. ‘Oh, and by the way,’ she called back through, ‘have you got one of those adaptor thingies?’
‘Adaptors?’ Mike asked. ‘What kind of adaptor?’
Emma came back in, holding a glass of water. ‘You know,’ she said. ‘So you can plug a few things in one socket at the same time. Only I need to charge my phone because I’m, um, expecting a call later, and there’s already the bedside lamp plugged in there. Well, the CD player right now, obviously, but I just wondered for, like, later. Unless there’s another plug somewhere? I didn’t see one.’
‘There’s another socket behind the bed,’ I said. ‘You can plug the bedside lamp in there if you like. I’m sure it’ll reach.’
‘Sweet,’ she said. ‘Great. Okay.’ She glanced at Roman. ‘Okay, I’ll be down in a bit then.’
I knew what was coming as soon as Emma had gone back upstairs. I’d answered automatically, but not without it flipping a mental switch with me. There were protocols for dealing with such things. As Mike well knew too.
‘A phone?’ he said, frowning. ‘In her bedroom and unsupervised? And a call from who exactly? She seemed cagey about that, didn’t you think?’ He sighed. ‘I can see this becoming complicated, can’t you?’
I knew what he meant, but didn’t share his anxiety. She hadn’t seemed cagey to me. If she’d wanted to be cagey she would have just plugged her phone in anyway, and made do with not having a bedside light, surely? Teenagers were notoriously obsessive about their privacy, but there was nothing in Emma’s tone that made me anxious about letting her have her phone, even if we did need to be clear on what the protocol was.
And there was always a protocol. There were protocols for everything in our line of work. Mike was right – with a young teenager like this we’d normally prohibit the use of a mobile up in their bedroom – and for obvious reasons. The children we looked after weren’t in any way the average; they often had dark and difficult pasts, and all the dark and difficult associations that kind of background tended to throw up. In some cases there might be family members wanting to snatch them back, even, which was why communication with families had to be supervised and managed, and our home address guarded as if it were a state secret. The risk to us, from some of the families whose children we took in, was very real and could not be underestimated. Though this was different. Well, as far as we knew, anyway. Emma’s mum had always put her in care voluntarily. And she was only with us now because of the baby. This wasn’t one of our ‘last chance saloon’ troubled kids, where violence and criminality were family norms.
‘Leave it with me, love,’ I said to Mike. ‘I’ll check with Maggie tomorrow morning. I know we wouldn’t normally allow it, but perhaps it’s not the issue it normally is in this case. Plus she might feel more secure having her phone close to her.’
Mike wasn’t convinced, though. ‘Or to conduct a whole life that we’re not privy to, more likely. You know what teenagers are like, love – always good at giving you the edited highlights of what they’re up to.’
Yes I did, and I’d known a fair few of them too. But that had been in my last job – not when it came to the ones we fostered. And that was precisely because mobile phone use was controlled. I still thought he was being just a little over-cautious, and we also mustn’t forget that Emma was a young mum – she had adult responsibilities now so we should at least grant her a few adult benefits. But I’d call Maggie anyway, just to put his mind at rest. Even if I knew he was worrying about nothing.
But it turned out that Mike was perhaps a little more perceptive than I was. It was in the small hours, around two, when I woke up that night. Woke up with a start, moreover, confused by what I was hearing. Was that a baby crying? Disorientated by the sound, I thought I was imagining it for a moment, and then my brain caught up – of course it was. We had a baby in the house now, didn’t we?
I didn’t stir, however, because my brain registered another thing as well – that the cry had come from downstairs, which meant that Emma had taken him down there, presumably to warm up one of the bottles she’d made up for him before going to bed.
But something was wrong. The crying wasn’t stopping. I lay in bed listening for what seemed like several minutes, at first smiling wryly at the memory of those interminable night feeds – both mine and Riley’s – but gradually becoming more and more agitated. How long did it take to warm a bottle? Not this long, surely. I glanced at the display on the alarm to find that it was approaching two-thirty. What on earth was she doing down there?
When the baby’s cries were so plaintive I could almost feel his distress personally, I flipped the duvet from over my legs and dragged on my dressing gown, before shuffling out of the bedroom and trudging downstairs. Perhaps she was having a problem with the microwave or something.
The crying was coming from the front room, however – not the kitchen – so that’s where I headed, and as I took in the scene I felt a wave of pure maternal anger. The baby was in his pram, screaming, kicking his little legs in frustration, while Emma, the sound conveniently muffled by a pair of earphones, was sitting cross-legged on the sofa, tapping away on – no, my eyes hadn’t deceived me – my laptop! And at her side, I belatedly noticed, was a large measuring jug, half full of water, in which a bottle of milk was bobbing, presumably cooling after having been heated up too much.
Presumably now cooled, in fact. I snatched it up, wiped it on my dressing gown and placed the teat in Roman’s open mouth, and while he sucked lustily – I held it in place for him as he fed – I turned my attention to Emma, who seemed almost completely oblivious. She’d seen me come in, of course – she’d even glanced at me – but she was doing that oh-so-teenagerish thing of finishing whatever she’d been doing – the furious typing of what was presumably some vital message – before deigning to pull out her earplugs and give me her full attention.
I stopped myself from picking up the baby. And it was hard. Though his hungry cries had by now been reduced to gulping sobs, this was no way for him to feed – he’d be gulping in as much air as nourishment – and it was only the insistent voice in my head, reminding me just how young and clueless (not to mention motherless) his mother was, that stopped me rounding on Emma in anger.
‘Emma,’ I said instead, keeping my voice low but firm, ‘what’s going on here? Surely you could hear Roman screaming? Even through those.’ I gestured pointedly to the earphones.
She looked up at me, completely without guile. And then at her baby, as if nothing much was up with him. ‘Oh, was it cool enough? I didn’t realise. It takes for ever to cool down, milk does. And I know he fusses, but, look, he’s fine now.’ She paused then, as if unsure quite what to do with me, since it didn’t look as if I planned on going anywhere any time soon. And then she seemed to decide I needed mollifying. ‘It’s all right,’ she said, seeing me still standing by the pram, feeding him. ‘If you just roll his blanket up into a ball and prop the bottle up, he’ll be fine. He can practically feed himself, that way.’
I was flabbergasted. He wasn’t even five weeks old! Practically feed himself? ‘Emma,’ I said sternly, ‘this bottle is almost stone cold. And a baby of Roman’s age needs to be held while he’s feeding and, equally to the point, what are you doing on my laptop at this hour of the night? What are you doing on my laptop at all?’
I could see from where I was that, as I’d thought, she was on Facebook, and was also aware that even now I didn’t have her full attention. Her eyes kept flicking back to whoever she was messaging on screen.
‘Emma!’