All the Romance You Need This Christmas: 5-Book Festive Collection. Romy Sommer
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‘I…’
‘Jessie! Jess, where… Jesus, Jessie, I’ve been looking everywhere for you. What are you doing round here?’
I turned to see Zac come hurtling round the corner, out of breath and panting as he doubled over, trying to catch his breath. ‘I was… I was just talking to…’ I turned back to where Mikku had been standing, but he’d gone. I hadn’t even felt him let go of my hand, but he’d definitely disappeared. ‘I was just talking to someone.’
‘Who?’ Zac panted, finally standing up straight, leaning back against the wall.
‘A friend. He’s been… he’s been a great help to me since I’ve been here.’
Zac looked at me, frowning slightly. ‘A big help? In what way?’
I stared out at the view of the town again, focusing on one of the giant Christmas trees across the road with its hundreds of tiny, white lights that twinkled in the darkness. ‘You might have noticed I’ve been behaving a little strangely these past few days.’ I turned to look at Zac and he smiled at me.
‘I just figured you had something on your mind, and it’s not really my place to pry into your private life, is it?’
I averted my gaze, scared I was going to start crying when I finally told him the truth. Because I knew I had to now. It was the right thing to do. ‘You wanted to celebrate the fact we’d found each other, didn’t you?’
‘Yes, I did. Jessie, sweetheart, this has been one hell of a strange week but the only thing I know, the only thing I’m sure about is that meeting you – that happened for a reason. I needed to meet you, I know that now.’
I looked at him, and this time it was my turn to frown. ‘You needed to meet me? I don’t understand…’
He reached out and took my gloved hand in his, his eyes staring deep into mine. ‘Last year, two weeks before Christmas, my fiancée, Evie, she died. In a car accident. She was coming home from a Christmas party and, well, some idiot had been drinking and his car crashed into the taxi Evie was travelling in as it waited at some traffic lights… She was killed instantly.’
‘Oh my God,’ I whispered, my heart almost jumping into my mouth. I felt quite breathless as I looked at him, watched the way his beautiful green eyes clouded over as he spoke. I could feel his sadness, I could feel it so strongly, washing over me, mingling with my own, and I couldn’t stop the tears from clouding my vision now. ‘I… I had no idea.’
‘She was the most beautiful, incredible woman, y’know? My soul mate. And I didn’t think I’d ever get over losing her and I tried, believe me, I tried to get over it. I threw myself into anything and everything I could. I tried starting new relationships but the guilt wouldn’t go. The guilt that I was betraying her, that I shouldn’t be doing this because I still loved her so much but there comes a time when being alone just isn’t an option anymore, Jessie. I’m tired of being alone. I loved Evie so much. So bloody much and it still breaks my heart… this time of year can be the loneliest of all. Don’t you think?’
I stared at him, saying nothing for a few minutes, letting everything he’d just told me sink in. I’d had no idea, no idea at all of just how much we needed each other. But we did, didn’t we? We needed each other.
‘I think… and this might sound crazy but, I think something made me come here, to Lapland, this Christmas. Something made me come here because… because I needed to meet you.’
I quickly wiped away the tears with the back of my glove as they started falling slowly down my cold cheek, my eyes fixed firmly on his. Suddenly everything was starting to make sense. I’d had a feeling I was supposed to be here, in this magical little town, this wonderful place, for a reason. And the reason was Zac.
‘My husband, Jase, he… he died too – a year ago, two weeks before Christmas.’
Zac squeezed my hand and I could see the tears starting to fall down his face, too, and all I wanted to do was kiss them away. And make everything better.
‘He was… it was a motorbike accident, a drunk-driver, on a country road and… I let him go out that night, Zac. I let him go out when I knew something didn’t feel right and if I’d only spoken up, told him what I felt…’
‘You couldn’t have known,’ Zac whispered, stroking my tears away with his glove-covered thumb. ‘You can’t blame yourself.’
‘But I did. For a long time. I still blame myself now. He was my life, Zac. He was my world, and without him I didn’t think I’d ever be able to carry on because… because I loved him so much, and losing him…’
‘It felt as though the world had ended,’ Zac whispered. ‘It felt as though a huge part of you had been ripped away and nothing could ever replace it.’
I nodded, still staring into his eyes, still feeling as though the last piece of an unfinished jigsaw puzzle was finally falling into place. ‘But then you came along, Zac.’
He smiled, squeezing my hand again, leaning forward to gently kiss the tears from my cheek, his lips warm against my cold skin. ‘But the guilt still wouldn’t go away?’
I nodded, holding onto his hand so tight because I didn’t want him to go, not anymore. I wanted him to stay right where he was. ‘The second I saw you, at The Ice Tree, I can’t explain what it was but the feelings I was experiencing… they were things I hadn’t felt in a long time. Because I hadn’t wanted to. Not since…’
He stopped me from talking by kissing me – a soft, beautiful, warm kiss and I fell against him, letting him hold me, loving the fact I was in somebody’s arms again. But not just anybody’s arms – I was in the arms of a man I knew I should be with. I’d come here to find him. He’d come here to find me. And this incredible little town had made sure we’d found each other. Somehow.
‘We’ll never forget them, Jess. We’ll never stop loving them. But we can stop feeling guilty now. I think we can finally allow ourselves the chance to move on, don’t you? I mean, it’s crazy, yes, and it’s happened so fast but… I think it was meant to be, don’t you?’
I was about to say yes, it was, it really was, when the most beautiful light coming from the sky made us both look up, his hand still holding tightly onto mine.
‘The Northern Lights,’ I gasped, unable to take my eyes off the scene developing above us.
Ribbons of green and sheets of red seemed to intertwine with sweeping curtains of blue, shimmering like sunlight in a wave of colour that was just breathtaking as it reflected in the darkness. I’d never seen anything like it before. I’d heard about the Northern Lights; they were the main reason Jase and I had wanted to come here, in the hope of seeing them, of experiencing this, but now that it was happening it was more beautiful than I’d ever imagined it could be.
Looking up at the glowing streams of colour, the bright lights that settled like early-morning mist over a meadow, I felt a mixture of emotions from pure joy to extreme sadness, tears still streaming down my face yet I was smiling. I was smiling the biggest smile as I watched this magical wonder of nature happening above me, the darkness and the incredible light morphing together like something only seen in fairytales. And this was my very own fairytale, what had happened here this Christmas.
‘It’s so beautiful,’ I whispered, gripping Zac’s hand tight, wanting so much to look at him but I was unable to take my eyes off the incredible sight in the sky. The dancing lights and the swirling colours were utterly mesmerising. It was as though every streak of colour, every swirl of those ribbons of green or those curtains of blue, it was as though they were talking to me, giving me some kind of message, telling me everything was okay. Telling me it was time to move on. Finally.
Then, as quickly as they’d appeared, the lights stopped for a moment, almost as if allowing their onlookers to take in their ethereal beauty for a final few seconds before