Diamonds Are Forever. Michelle Madow
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“When you made that promise, did you know you wouldn’t be able to keep it?”
“No,” Savannah said. “I wanted to stick to it. I swear it.”
Peyton rolled her eyes. “So why didn’t you?” she asked. “It wasn’t hard—we live in a different state than Mom and Grandma. All you had to do was not pick up the phone when they called.”
Savannah shook her head, amazed that Peyton didn’t get it. “Maybe it wasn’t hard for you,” she said. “But it was for me. I kept thinking...what if Mom gets so upset by our ignoring her that she relapses? She kept calling and reaching out to us, so eventually I had to pick up, and once I started talking to her, I couldn’t just stop again. But I’ve felt terrible about talking to her every time.”
“You shouldn’t feel bad about wanting to be there for your mom,” Aunt Sophie said. “That was kind of you to do—especially considering the magnitude of her lies. It takes strength to forgive and love unconditionally, and you have that strength, Savannah. It’s what makes you shine.”
“Thank you.” Savannah swallowed and glanced at her nails. She’d never had someone say something that nice to her before.
“I mean it,” Aunt Sophie said. “It seems like the real problem here is that you didn’t feel like you could be honest with your sisters.”
“I know,” Savannah said. “I was afraid. And I felt bad that I couldn’t follow through with the promise that I’d made them.” She took a deep breath and looked at both Peyton and Courtney. Peyton’s eyes were hard, and Courtney’s face was still red from the yelling she’d done earlier. “I hate when you guys are mad at me. I don’t want to take sides between both of you and Mom and Grandma, but I should have told you the moment I realized I couldn’t go through with the promise. And I shouldn’t have said any of that stuff to you just now. I didn’t mean it. I wasn’t thinking, and it just came out. I’m sorry.”
“It doesn’t change what you did,” Peyton said. “Or what you said.”
“Is that fair, Peyton?” Aunt Sophie asked. “Of course Savannah can’t take back what she said or did—that’s how life works. There are no do-overs. Everyone makes mistakes, and if you can’t forgive them, you’ll end up pushing everyone away. That’s no way to live. What’s most important is intent. Do you think Savannah means what she’s saying in her apology?”
“Sure.” Peyton shrugged. “I guess.”
“All right.” Aunt Sophie nodded. “I suppose that’s progress. Now, what about you, Courtney? Do you accept Savannah’s apology?”
“I want to.” Courtney focused on Savannah, and while her eyes were glassy, they weren’t angry like they were earlier. “And I will. I know you didn’t want to go behind my back, but it doesn’t change that you did. I just hope in the future you’ll be honest with me. Okay?”
“Okay.” Savannah smiled. “I promise.”
“Does this mean we’ll be able to enjoy this weekend in peace?” Aunt Sophie asked. She coughed, took a few wheezing breaths, and cleared her throat. “After all, we do have Courtney’s birthday to celebrate tomorrow.”
“I’m going to be civil to Grandma and Mom,” Courtney said. “But that doesn’t mean I forgive them. What they did by not telling me that Britney even existed...that’s unforgivable.”
“But you have to forgive them eventually,” Savannah said. “Right?”
“I don’t know.” She grabbed her backpack and pulled it onto the bed. “But I do know we’re celebrating my birthday tomorrow, and I have homework I need to do today.”
“I supposed that’s enough for now,” Aunt Sophie said. “And I need to get some rest. Would one of you mind helping me up the stairs?”
“Of course.” Courtney jumped up off her bed and helped Aunt Sophie up. “I’m so sorry that we bothered you.”
“No need to apologize,” she said. “I just hope I helped.”
“You did,” Savannah said, watching Courtney lead Aunt Sophie out of their room. Every step of Aunt Sophie’s was slow, and she breathed heavily as she walked. She couldn’t imagine how she’d come down here on her own.
“She seems really nice,” she said to Peyton once Aunt Sophie and Courtney were up the steps.
“Yeah,” Peyton agreed. “It sucks that she’s so sick.”
“I’ve never known what to say to her,” Savannah said. “She’s the first person I’ve ever known who knows she’s dying. But after that conversation...I’m glad we’re here this weekend.”
“I’m glad we’re here, too,” Peyton said, pulling at the ends of her sleeves. “It’s weird, though. Talking to her is almost like...talking to a ghost.”
Savannah shivered, and they were both silent for a few seconds.
Then her phone buzzed with a text. Evie.
Hey, Savannah! I saw on Twitter that you’re in California, and was hoping we could hang out? :)
Savannah glared at her phone, clicked out of the text, tossed it onto her bed.
“Wow,” Peyton said. “Whoever that was must have really pissed you off.”
“It was Evie,” Savannah said. “She wants to hang out.”
“But you’re still mad at her?”
Savannah thought back to the last time she’d spoken to Evie—the night of her Sweet Sixteen. Evie had known that Savannah had feelings for Damien, but she’d tried to flirt with him, anyway. After Savannah caught her, Evie had blown up. She’d called Savannah a selfish brat, and said that Savannah’s YouTube channel was stupid because she only sang covers and no original songs. Then she’d tried to claim that her making moves on Damien was good for Savannah, because it would prove to Savannah whether or not Damien was worth it. It was so convoluted.
At least Damien hadn’t fallen for it—he’d only been talking to Evie because he felt bad for her, because Evie had felt out of place at the party.
“I’m still mad at her,” Savannah said. “I don’t want to see her.”
“What about everything Aunt Sophie said?” Peyton asked. “About forgiveness?”
“That was different,” she said. “You and Courtney are my sisters—we have to forgive each other. I don’t need to be friends with Evie.”
“It’s your call,” Peyton said. “I’m just surprised.”
Savannah frowned and glanced at her phone. If Peyton was telling her to forgive Evie, maybe she should? But then she reminded herself about the mean things Evie had said at the party, and the way she’d tried snuggling into Damien, and anger surged through her body.
“You lost touch with your friends from Fairfield,” Savannah said. “Why shouldn’t I do the same?”
“Because those ‘friends’ I had in Fairfield were never really my friends,” Peyton said. “They were just people to hang out with and party with. But you and Evie were best friends. I always thought that you would have preferred to have her as a sister over me or Courtney.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Savannah said. “I would never choose to have anyone as a sister besides you and Courtney.”
“But you did always have more fun with her than you did with either of us,” Peyton said. “And don’t say it’s not true, because I’ll know you’re lying.”
Savannah shrugged, since she did have a lot of fun hanging out with Evie. They could talk and laugh about everything. It wasn’t that she didn’t have fun with her sisters, but