Chimera. Wendy Lill
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interpretation,” you’ll “consult with your department.”
CLARE:
Right.
DOYLE fixes her collar, removes strands of hair. DOYLE produces some antacids. CLARE gulps them down.
DOYLE:
Loosen your shoulders. Deep breath. And remember, this is fun. This is extreme fun. You are a Minister.
CLARE:
How did you get so smart so young?
DOYLE:
It’s a limited bandwidth. The car’s out front. Laura is waiting at Members’ Entrance to go in with you. Remember lipstick. Powder your nose in the car. And smile!
CLARE takes a deep breath, collects herself, smiles broadly, heads out the door. DOYLE sighs, sits down at his desk, satisfied. He has got his Minister off to the House.
The sound of Question Period comes up.
In his office, ROY puts down the pile of press releases, checks watch and turns on his TV.
ROY:
It’s showtime.
DOYLE begins watching Question Period on a screen as well.
1/6 HOUSE OF COMMONS
The television camera lights are on the House of Commons. CLARE and FANNING are in their places.
SPEAKER The Member from White Cloud.
FANNING:
Mr. Speaker, it is always a pleasure to see what bright new creations the new Minister of Justice will blind the TV cameras with.
ROY:
The girl with the red-hot hair.
FANNING:
But in a more serious vein, last night I received some very disturbing information.
MEMBERS:
Whooah!
FANNING:
Is the Minister aware that not five miles from this House, in Nepean, a scientist is injecting human embryonic stem cells into gorillas, creating something called— (stumbles) chi ... chimeras?
MEMBERS:
Whooah! Shame!
MEMBERS:
making monkey sounds.
DOYLE picks up phone.
DOYLE:
What’s he talking about?
ROY:
(watching CLARE on screen) She has no idea.
SPEAKER The Honourable Minister of Justice.
CLARE:
Mr. Speaker, I want to thank the Member opposite for his question. However, sometimes I wonder if the Honourable Member and his colleagues have evolved very far from the jungle themselves.
MEMBER:
Whooah! Low blow!
CLARE:
And that is why I am particularly proud that our government passed the very progressive piece of legislation—The Human Reproductive Technology Act—one year ago today.
MEMBERS:
Hear! Hear!
CLARE:
... an act which provides a framework for all of the new fertility technologies, that forbids the selling of babies and embryos, and protects women and children and the most vulnerable as we go forward with the genetic revolution.
MEMBERS:
Bravo! Hear! Hear!
ROY:
Always was good on her feet.
DOYLE:
Good save.
SPEAKER:
Order! Order! Next question. The Member from ...
House of Commons fades.
1/7 THE HOT ROOM
ROY picks up the phone book, starts flipping through it.
ROY:
Nepean ... gorillas ... chimeras ... (The phone rings, ROY picks it up) Yo. Action Central, (surprised, grimaces) Hey! Mary Colin, (hurries on) Hey! Before you start on me, I know you’ve been calling and I’ve been meaning to get back to you, but I’ve got the new job ... I’ve been busy as hell ... so how’s it going? (listens, puts down the phone book, incredulous) He ... what? An hour ago. That’s not possible. An hour ago. God. That’s ... I can’t believe ... I can’t ... (gets up, listening, starts walking about) On Monday. No, I’m busy Monday. I can’t ... (listens to a blast, getting more agitated) Jesus, Mary Colin, will you just ... I can’t come. ’Cause I can’t. I won’t. Leave me alone! Don’t give me that guilt shit. I’m not coming to the godamned ...!
ROY slams down receiver, sits staring at the phone.
1/8 FANNING’S OFFICE
FANNING:
(calling through newsrooms) Is this the Barrie Examiner? George Fanning here, MP for White Cloud. Alberta. I was wondering if you received my press release and whether you have any ... (pause) Well, if there’s anything ... Thanks. (dials again)
FANNING:
Yes, is this the newsroom of the Lunenburg Progress Enterprise? I’m sorry, I must have the wrong number ... Oh, it’s the Fredericton Gleaner. I must have ... anyway, hello, this is George Fanning, MP for White Cloud ... Alberta ... I was wondering if you received the press release I sent you on ... Okay, fine. (hangs up, discouraged)
1/9 A BAR
ROY is drinking heavily. EDDIE LLOYD joins him.
EDDIE:
Roy Boy. I’ve missed your sour puss. (slaps him on the back) First things first, (pulls out a little album) Got some pictures of the grandchildren. Aren’t they the cutest little runts?
ROY:
Cute.
EDDIE:
New job, I hear.
ROY:
(shrugs) See you’re working the room.
EDDIE:
I’m in town for the big science shindig. Doing some work for the university.
ROY:
The high life of an overzealous corporate mouthpiece.
EDDIE:
(leans in) Heard you got a bit overzealous yourself on your buggered-boys story. Heard you got tossed from the Whig Standard.
ROY:
Piss off.
EDDIE:
Hey, it happens to the best of us! (slaps him on the shoulder) Let me give you The Pitch. The short form. I start with a question. How many of us would be alive today if it weren’t for science? Not me. I’d be dead ten times. I’ve got that peanut thing. Ten close calls. Keep my salvation right here in my jacket pocket. Say a prayer to science every night. Little men and women in white coats. Thank you. That’s why I am honoured to be here representing Capital U. Anything I can do to help, I jump right up to the plate. It’s a personal