In the Dog House. V.M. Burns
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adulterous relationship, and instead you’re shifting blame for the dissolution of our marriage onto me. This is not about equality or gay rights, which, by the way, I support. This is about you not being man enough to tell your mother the truth. You cheated on me with that skinny bimbo. You broke your marriage vows. And you are shifting the responsibility for the divorce onto me.” I was practically screaming.
“Shush. Keep your voice down.”
“I will not be shushed in my own house.” I picked up a bottle of perfume on the bureau and flung it as hard as I could at Albert’s head. Unfortunately, he ducked and the bottle hit the wall and shattered.
“You’re crazy. You could have killed me.”
“You’re right. I am crazy.” There was a line of perfume bottles, jewelry boxes, and other objects atop the bureau, and I picked up each one and flung it at Albert, who was now standing against the bedroom wall, dodging flying objects. “I was crazy to have married you. I was crazy to have stayed married to you for twenty-five years. I was crazy to have believed you when you said you were working late at the office all of those nights.” I flung the last object, which missed Albert but went flying through the window.
The bedroom door opened, and Stephanie and Dixie rushed inside.
“Mom, are you okay?”
The anger that had fueled my screaming, object-flinging tirade was spent, and I suddenly felt tired. I slumped down onto the bed. “Get out.”
Albert didn’t budge. He looked at me and then looked at Dixie. “This is all your fault. She was perfectly fine until you came up here with your killer poodles and your guns and started putting ideas in her head.”
“Why, you lily-livered, bald-faced, two-timing sleazeball. I have half a mind to—”
We never found out what Dixie had half a mind to do, because, at that moment, the bimbo walked in.
“Al, are you going to be much longer? There’s a weird man downstairs in a wheelchair who’s giving me the creeps.”
“That’s Mr. Hurston. He lives next door,” Stephanie said. “He doesn’t get out much, so we always invite him over whenever we have parties.” She looked from Bambi to me. “Why am I explaining this to her?”
Bambi walked into the bedroom and frowned at the smell from all of the broken perfume bottles. “We’re going to have to redecorate. I hate all this. It looks like old people furniture. We’re going to need new carpet in this room.”
Stephanie looked as though she wanted to strangle Bambi, but I held up a hand to stop her.
“Get out.” My words were steel. Firm, cold, and solid.
Whether it was the look in my eyes or the tone of my voice, I don’t know. Whatever it was, Albert didn’t argue. He grabbed Bambi by the arm and propelled her toward the door. He stopped only to reach into his jacket and pull out an envelope, which he placed in my purse, which was open and sitting on the dresser. Then they left.
Albert always thought money could buy him out of all of his problems, but I wasn’t in the mood to fight. Miss Florrie was right. You had to pick your battles, and teaching my soon-to-be ex-husband that money couldn’t buy everything was a lesson that would have to wait until another day. I was a limp dishcloth. I sat slumped over on the edge of the bed, all my energy spent.
I could feel the looks Dixie and Stephanie exchanged. Both of them sat down on either side of me and engulfed me in their arms. I felt their love and support surrounding and supporting me. I had no idea how long we sat like that—moments or hours, I couldn’t say. I felt hollow inside. Mentally, I drifted through the last twenty-five years. I acknowledged the good times, along with the not-so-good ones. Then I closed the door on that part of my life. No tears. Miss Florrie was right; those were too precious to waste on the likes of Albert.
My stomach growled, and I realized I hadn’t eaten since the early morning.
Stephanie laughed. “You okay, Mom?”
I reached over and gave her a squeeze. “I’m going to be just fine.” I stood up. “Now, let’s go downstairs and get some food before those vultures devour everything.”
We went downstairs. Most of the people were gone, along with the majority of the food. There were red stains on the carpet, which looked a lot like blood, but were most likely lasagna and red wine. For a brief moment, I was tempted to get the hydrogen peroxide and begin the process of treating the stains. Then I remembered Bambi’s comments about redecorating and new carpet and stopped myself. No way was I cleaning the carpet for her.
Two of Albert’s brothers, along with one nephew, were watching a baseball game on the television. Their wives were sitting in the kitchen, and children were running around everywhere.
I walked into the living room, picked up the remote, and turned off the television.
Their faces reflected confusion and thunderous clouds of rage. How dare I turn off the television in the middle of a game! Never mind the fact that it was my television, my remote, and my home, at least for a few more weeks anyway.
I held up a hand and announced loud enough for the wives in the other room to hear. “I have an announcement to make.”
Gino, Albert’s youngest brother, said, “Can it wait until after the game?” Gino was short but worked out, so he was very muscular. He liked to wear tight shirts, which emphasized his physique, and tight pants, to emphasize other areas of his anatomy. He had thick dark hair, dark eyes, and a dark complexion. He was a rogue. He enjoyed looking at himself and believed he was irresistible to women. Unfortunately, he also liked to wear a lot of cologne, which brought tears to my eyes.
“No, it cannot wait.”
He rolled his eyes and waved his hand in a royal gesture. “Alright, get on with it. We’re missing the game.”
The wives came into the living room and stood by, looking at me, waiting for my announcement.
“Albert is having an affair with that twenty-year-old child he brought to the party. We’re getting a divorce. I don’t know what he’s told you, and frankly, I don’t really care. This party was a farce, and it’s over.” I walked to the front door and opened it. “So, I want all of you to leave now.”
The room was silent, and no one moved for several seconds.
Eventually, Gino stood up. “Look, I’m real sorry things didn’t work out between you and Albert, and if what you say is true, then that’s really bad. But this is the playoffs. Why don’t you go in the kitchen and take a load off?” He looked around for his wife, Angela. “Angela, take Lilly into the kitchen.” He reached for the remote.
I snatched the remote from his hand. “I don’t need to ‘sit down and take a load off.’ What I need is for you”—I looked around—“all of you, to leave my house right now.” I marched back to the door. “Get out.”
Gino stared for a few seconds, but then walked to the door. “Come on. We can watch the game at my house.” He walked to the door, stopped in front of me, as if he was going to speak, but then apparently thought better of it and left.
The others followed and, within seconds, my house was empty, except for Dixie, Stephanie, and me. When the last guest left, I closed the door and heaved a heavy sigh of relief.
“Wow.” Awe was reflected in Dixie’s eyes. “That was amazing.”
I chuckled, slightly embarrassed.
“That really was amazing, Mom.” Stephanie kissed my cheek. “You’re a lot stronger than I thought.”
“I’m stronger than I thought I was too.” I stared at the mess. “Now, let’s eat.”
Dixie went out to check on the dogs. She’d left them in the RV while we shopped and prepared for the party. I’d checked out her RV earlier, and it was actually nicer than my