The Vagrant. Peter Newman
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yes? Ezze will paint her with words and you will not resist!’ The Vagrant leans forward, it does not stop the words. ‘She is pert, very healthy, no rashes, no growths, Ezze only brings his friends goods he can trust. Ah, her hips are … are … Is there a problem, friend, you look unhappy? Ah Ezze sees now,’ fingers tap loudly against the shopkeeper’s forehead, ‘so obvious, Ezze is being blind man, many apologies. Forget the girl, she is too plain for you. I have another friend, he has a cousin, handsome boy, firm biceps, a tattoo, very tasteful, goes from the tip of his—’
The Vagrant catches the descending hand before it can point. He shakes his head, slowly this time, holding Ezze’s gaze.
‘Of course, of course, you are a serious man with a very firm grip and you like it that way! I see it all now. But give Ezze something! What do you want? I work miracles for you, but first you say what markets you love.’
He releases Ezze, takes out the navpack, shining its flickering light between their feet.
‘Is sad, yes? Looking at picture of what’s gone.’
The Vagrant points to the image of the mountains, flicks his finger northwards.
‘Ah, you wish to travel, to Wonderland? My friend it is an amazing place but trust Ezze when he says, it is not for you. Better that you stay here, make a life. Or travel south, so much easier to go back. The Usurper welcomes all to his cities but the north gate is watched, closed to the likes of you.’ Ezze’s frame shakes with a theatrical sigh. ‘But Ezze sees your heart is set. It will take a miracle and lots of wealth but it can happen. You stay here out of sight and Ezze will go, see what can be done for you, my travel-hungry friend.’
With practised ease, Ezze slips out into the shop. ‘Bruise, watch for customers. Remember, they cannot leave until they buy. And you, beast—’ he picks up a heavy piece of striped plastic sheeting ‘—your hairiness must be hidden!’ He throws the plastic over the goat’s head. ‘And if you shit on my floor, Ezze eats goat’s eyes tonight, ha!’
Bruise watches his master leave, smile settling to a sneer.
In the shopkeeper’s absence, other noises take their turn. Erratically, tech ticks and legs scuttle just behind the walls. Though dimmed the street continues to bustle outside.
Small hands press on the inside of the Vagrant’s coat. He puts the baby on the bed, begins to search the room, lifting covers and lids. Mismatched earrings sit with nipple rings and nose studs, too clean to be innocent. Toes peek beneath a cloth in a corner, motionless. Frowning, the Vagrant pulls it away revealing a woman of foam, headless, her hips squished flat. He drops the cover back, searching no further.
A fresh smell fills the room, pungent, violent.
The baby giggles.
The Vagrant sighs, folds the soiled cloth and hides it, a secret memento. Bare legs wave excitedly, dancing to a beat unheard.
Hours pass. The baby drinks, wriggles, sleeps.
Footsteps herald the shopkeeper’s return. The Vagrant’s coat sweeps down, swallowing the baby once more.
‘Now it is all clear! Ezze has heard rumours, strange things.’ A hand waves towards the Vagrant. ‘Ezze has many friends and they tell him that the Usurper’s knights came here when they should not, entering the city before Darktime. Can you imagine such a thing? They are searching for a man. Some say he has killed one of them. Impossible, yes, but they are here. Ezze hears a challenge has been made between these knights and the Uncivil’s Duke. The one who gets this man first, wins. Both sides, they are hungry for victory, they will give a great reward to whoever helps them win. You understand, yes?’
The Vagrant’s hand drifts slowly towards the sword’s hilt.
‘All of Verdigris is looking for this man. If he wishes to escape he will need to be clever, to have powerful friends and great wealth. Ezze can be that friend, he has found people that can help but they are scared. Ezze is scared. But everything has a price; freedom, courage, it can all be bought if you have the right goods.’
Getting up, the Vagrant uncovers the goat, detaches a sack.
‘Ah yes, Ezze is interested. What else do you have?’
The Vagrant’s eyes narrow.
‘Before, a sack of pasha would be enough. But now? Now everything is changed. Now they are looking for you, all of them. Terrible things would happen if we are caught and then what would happen to the thirteen children, the three sisters, the sick brother who coughs blood, the hungry wives, and the lovers who keep Ezze going?’
Sacks are lined up between them, leaving the goat skinny, unburdened.
‘For this, Ezze can disguise you, get you to the gates a safe way, even bribe the guards. But you will need a distraction. It will cost. You understand, miracles are never cheap, eh?’
The Vagrant holds out a coin. It sits in his palm, too bright for the dingy room.
Ezze peers at the shining disk. ‘But what is this, another mystery? Ezze is speechless! There is a good price for these on the market now, so rare.’ Happy sweat lines the shopkeeper’s lip. ‘This is good, very good. Ezze accepts your offer.’ The coin is taken, kissed and tucked away, soft luminescence hidden within folded sleeves. ‘You still stare at Ezze, why? Ah you want change. Of course Ezze would normally give something back to balance such a valuable gift but it is not so simple. The coin is valuable, yes? Yes, this is not to be argued with but most have been seized, and to sell this one on will make questions. Ezze does not enjoy questions of this kind. When your distraction is bought and discretion for sale is bought, not much left for poor Ezze. So with much sadness I can give you no change.’
The Vagrant sighs.
‘Do not be that way, deal is done.’ Ezze’s hands smack together. ‘Now we must get to work, friend, if you are to escape Verdigris with all your fingers!’
The shopkeeper rummages, commentary unceasing. A pile of objects begins to grow at their feet.
‘Ezze sees problem. You are too strange, easy to spot. But fear not, friend, here are the answers!’ A pair of horns is held up, painted plastic given the appearance of bone. ‘For your beast,’ Ezze explains. ‘Make her look like a tainted male, yes? Ezze give her hump too, and fake double tail, even you will not know her! There used to be demand for costume, some customers like the taint, sexy, you know what I mean? Of course you do! But now market is full of real thing, so hard to shift costume.’ The shopkeeper examines the Vagrant, shaking his head, pursing his lips. ‘You are more tricky, for you Ezze needs to make purchase.’ A bundle of grimy cloth is offered. ‘Put this on while Ezze is out, and hide your things in a separate bag, we hide it in the hump, yes? They are looking for man with weapons so we give them something else to look at.’
Ezze leaves. Quiet follows.
The Vagrant begins to dress the goat, pulling it into the back room. Horns, tail and hump are attached, the latter’s hollow space stuffed with the Vagrant’s coat. The sword is too big for the hump. The Vagrant lashes it to a bundle of poles, crooked and rusty, wraps them in old sacking, hangs them by flaccid bags already slung across the goat’s back. The goat does not care, her nose dives into a sack, comes away with stolen fruit.
He turns to his own outfit. Stale plastic drops over his head, a giant’s poncho. He ties it loosely at the waist, slips the baby inside. It coughs delicately but does not wake. He waits.
Puffing is heard at the doors. ‘Good news, friend! Ezze finds perfect thing at Necrotraders.’ The shopkeeper emerges, unfurling something long, suckered and dead. ‘Impressive, no? Come closer, smell it.’
The Vagrant covers his nose, steps back.
‘Yes! You see, friend? We disguise you not just as tainted, but as sick. We fix tentacle to you, pad your clothes more, add a little juice, make them think you have leak. Nobody goes near you, no searching, no troubles.’