The Renegade's Redemption. Stacy Henrie
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to take shape inside his head. Staying was a foolish idea. If he wanted to help, he could give her money, as he had in the past, though he suspected she didn’t know those anonymous envelopes of cash were from him.
Ravena wasn’t likely to accept his offer of money though. She would likely see it as him buying her off, attempting to monetarily make up for the pain of the past. And she’d be right, wouldn’t she?
He paced the grass, his side and head beginning to ache. Did she have to be so stubborn? Do you? a gentle thought from deep inside him countered.
Yanking off his hat, he slapped it against his leg. He had to leave. What if she learned he was the Texas Titan? He spun around, determined to bid her goodbye after insisting she take some of his money. But Ravena was no longer plowing. Instead she stood still, her eyes meeting his across the field.
There was more than freshly-turned earth between them—there was a chasm of regrets and heartache. And yet, he hadn’t stopped caring about her and likely never would. She’d been his greatest friend and his first and only love. How could he turn his back on her a second time?
The answer came swift and firm: he couldn’t.
Plopping his hat back on, he marched toward the house. Jacob guided his horse forward as Tex drew closer. “What did she say about me missing school to help?”
“Nothing. I didn’t ask her, but you can put the horse away.”
The boy’s brow scrunched in bewilderment. “Put him away? Why?”
After removing his jacket, Tex tossed it to Jacob who caught it one-handed. “Because,” he said, rolling up his sleeves, “I’m staying to help, kid.”
With heavy heart, Ravena watched Tex walk away. He’d appeared to be feeling well enough today that she’d considered inviting him to eat supper in the kitchen with them tonight, but that would no longer be an option. He was already leaving, without saying goodbye. Just as he’d done once before. She told herself she ought to be glad, relieved even, that he was finally going. One of her many problems had solved itself. Tex would no longer be a constant and painful reminder of the past.
But she didn’t feel happy. She felt like slipping to the dirt and giving in to the desolation threatening to consume her.
Checking her emotions, she gave the horses a gentle slap with the reins and called, “Walk on.” The plowing wouldn’t get done if she didn’t do it herself, whether she felt up to the task or not.
Everything would work out, she firmly told herself, with the Lord’s help. It was something her grandparents had taught her over and over again. Something she’d clung to when Tex hadn’t returned. And she would hold to that hope now. Somehow, some way, she would finish plowing her fields, get the crops planted and build the house. She had to. For herself, for the five children under her care and for those four boys she hoped to bring home soon. They were counting on her and so was her grandfather, whether he was here or not.
As she turned the horses at the edge of the field and lined them up for the next furrow, a flash of movement caught her eye. Ravena twisted to see what it was and felt the breath leave her lungs when she saw Tex stalking back toward her.
“Whoa.” She stopped the horses, her heartbeat thrashing with confusion. What was he doing? Had he decided to say goodbye after all?
Stepping away from the team, she crossed her arms tightly against her worn dress as she waited for Tex to approach. Not for the first time she wondered what sort of young women he’d met or fallen in love with during his time away. If his new clothes and the money in his saddlebags were any indication, he’d likely been associated with wealthy, sophisticated girls. Not farm women with patched clothes and five children to care for.
“I figured you’d be gone by now, Tex,” she said in an icy tone when he was still a few feet away. Anger was her ally, her protection, against having her heart broken again. “Did you forget something?” Maybe it was his jacket. He was no longer wearing it and his sleeves had been rolled back.
“Nope,” he answered. He strode right past her and grabbed the reins.
Ravena stared at him in bewilderment. “What are you doing?” she repeated. Why wasn’t he saying goodbye? Why wouldn’t he just let her be?
“This field needs plowing,” he said before clucking to the horses.
“Of course it needs plowing.” She hurried to keep in step with him and the team. “Which is why I’ve been plowing it, all day.”
Tex didn’t slow. “Now you don’t have to do it. According to Jacob, you’ve got a real need for help this year.” He cast a glance at her. “He seems like a good kid. And stronger than you might think. I’d let him do more.”
Ravena’s mouth fell open and she stopped walking. Was he trying to tell her how to run the farm? Indignation rose inside her as hot as the sun on her back and arms.
“You have no right, Tex Beckett,” she said, her voice shaking with fury. “No right to plow my field before you disappear again or offer your completely unsolicited advice. You left, Tex. By your own volition last time, but this time, I’m demanding that you go.”
Her words had the desired effect. Tex jerked back on the reins and turned to face her. “I’m not leaving, Ravena. Not yet.”
“Yes, you are.” She clenched her hands into fists at her sides, anger and fear dueling inside her. “I will not allow you to manipulate me or think that plowing my field somehow makes up for...for...” She swallowed the fast-forming lump in her throat. “That it somehow makes up for everything else. I want you to leave. And if you don’t, I’m sending Jacob for the sheriff.”
She spun on her heel, intent on making good on her threat, but Tex moved quicker and stopped her with a hand to her elbow. At his touch, her pulse galloped for an entirely different reason than resentment or panic. “Ravena, wait. You’re right.”
Searching his blue gaze, she couldn’t detect any deceit there. But how well did she really know him now? “Right about what?”
“Plowing your field doesn’t make up for the past. And it isn’t supposed to.” He lowered his hand and a traitorous prick of disappointment shot through her. “I want to help with the rest of the plowing and the planting too.”
She folded her arms, suspicious. “Why?” What made him want to stick around this time when he hadn’t all those years ago?
Tex ran his hand over his clean-shaven jaw in a gesture of pure agitation. “I’d like to help because you need it.”
When she opened her mouth to protest, he forged on, “I know you’ll say you don’t. But Jacob says otherwise, and I can see with my own eyes how much work there is right now. You’ve helped me more than your fair share this last week. So let me help you.”
She sensed only sincerity behind his admission, but she still wanted to tell him no. She needed him gone, away, and no longer wreaking havoc in her life and with her feelings. But would she be able to find someone else as willing to help as he seemed to be?
“I can only pay you the same wage I did the other hired hands,” she said, her chin held firm and aloft. She wouldn’t let him see yet that she was beginning to waver in her resolve to turn him out.
“I don’t want your money, Ravena. I’m offering to help without pay.” He pushed his hat up, then tugged it back down as if embarrassed. “It’s the least I can do after all you’ve done to help me get well.”
He’d work for free? Her adamancy that he leave was weakening by the second. “How long will you stay?”
A slow smile lifted his mouth and brightened his blue eyes. The kind of smile that had once lit her world. “Does that mean you accept my offer?”