Wellies and Westies. Cressida McLaughlin

Читать онлайн книгу.

Wellies and Westies - Cressida  McLaughlin


Скачать книгу

      ‘Y’know, dog walking, stick…we’re collecting dog puns.’

      ‘Not intentionally,’ Cat said. ‘But you’re right, I didn’t last at the nursery.’

      Since she’d been living there, it had become an evening ritual. Cat would tell Joe all the things she wished they’d been doing at the nursery, and Joe, a freelance illustrator, would go on about how wonderfully cooperative his clients were to begin with, and how it would take him half a day to lovingly create a drawing of a single person, only to be told by the client that they looked too angry, or too insipid, or too posh. Joe was currently working on websites, marketing and branding for small companies and, at the moment, a local magazine that was probably the cause of the hair pulling.

      ‘Whose decision?’ Joe asked.

      ‘What?’

      ‘Did you jump, or were you pushed?’

      The room fell into silence, thoughts drifting up towards the high ceiling as Cat tried to conjure up the best way of explaining what had happened. She didn’t need to.

      ‘Cat took Disco to the nursery in her handbag, and she escaped during music time. It gave the children more excitement than Miss Knickers-too-tight could handle.’ Polly poured more wine, put her feet back on the table and took them off again at Joe’s instant glare.

      ‘You took a puppy into a nursery in a handbag?’ He narrowed his eyes.

      Cat nodded.

      ‘And expected chaos not to rain down upon you?’

      ‘I was hopeful.’

      ‘You were deluded. No wonder she fired you.’

      Cat pressed her lips together and gave a small nod. ‘Maybe. But look where it’s led me.’

      ‘What, to a bottle of wine and some pie-in-the-sky idea about becoming the local Dr Dolittle?’

      ‘Hey!’

      ‘Joe,’ Polly chided, ‘that’s not fair. If Cat sets her mind to it, then I think she can do it.’

      ‘Well, I’m looking forward to seeing how it turns out.’ He raised his glass, and Polly and Cat did the same, though Cat could see amusement glimmering behind Joe’s serious expression. His rather large ginger cat, Shed, took the opportunity to stalk into the room, shaking out his back feet in turn as if discarding distasteful footwear, and positioned himself on the coffee table. He nudged the bottle of wine close to the edge with his tail.

      ‘How come Shed’s allowed on the table and not my feet?’ Polly asked. This was not a new argument, and Shed gave her a look that said just that: I’m allowed, you’re not. Get over it.

      Joe shrugged. ‘It’s harder to get him to behave than you.’

      ‘So your battles are based on the effort it takes to achieve the required results? That’s a hopeless way to live your life, Joey.’

      ‘Yeah, well. I’m older than you are.’

      ‘But not wiser.’

      ‘It’s my lease, so I get to make the decisions.’

      ‘I’m paying the same amount of rent.’

      ‘Do you always have to be so argumentative?’

      ‘Only when I’m standing up for my rights.’ Polly crossed her arms.

      ‘Your rights to have your feet on the table?’

      ‘I had a shower when I got in, so they’re perfectly clean. Cleaner than Shed’s, I bet. And he’s got his bum on the table.’

      Joe looked sideways at his sister. ‘Fair point. Come on, Shed.’

      He prodded Shed’s back, and the cat glared at him and stepped onto his knee, kneading his paws into Joe’s jeans.

      ‘Ahhh – aaaaaaaaaah, not there, Shed!’ Joe tried to move the cat but he refused to budge, and Cat hid her laughter behind her glass. She made the mistake of catching Polly’s eye, and they both shook silently while Joe tried to rescue his private parts. Small portions of near-harmless revenge were very satisfying, even when they came from an unlikely source.

      The bottle of wine was empty, Cat’s eyes were blinking sleepily and Joe had long since disappeared to do more work or fume, silently, behind his office door. Polly switched off the television and drummed her fingers on the table.

      Cat sat up. ‘What?’

      ‘He’s not always like that, you know.’

      ‘Who, Shed?’ Shed was asleep in Joe’s place on the sofa, a big orange fuzz, his face buried under his tail. Cat imagined he was secretly plotting ways to get her into trouble, playing the perfect pet against her role of irritating new housemate.

      Конец ознакомительного фрагмента.

      Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».

      Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию на ЛитРес.

      Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.

/9j/4QAYRXhpZgAASUkqAAgAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP/sABFEdWNreQABAAQAAABQAAD/4QQDaHR0cDov L25zLmFkb2JlLmNvbS94YXAvMS4wLwA8P3hwYWNrZXQgYmVnaW49Iu+7vyIgaWQ9Ilc1TTBNcENl aGlIenJlU3pOVGN6a2M5ZCI/PiA8eDp4bXBtZXRhIHhtbG5zOng9ImFkb2JlOm5zOm1ldGEvIiB4 OnhtcHRrPSJBZG9iZSBYTVAgQ29yZSA1LjAtYzA2MSA2NC4xNDA5NDksIDIwMTAvMTIvMDctMTA6 NTc6MDEgICAgICAgICI+IDxyZGY6UkRGIHhtbG5zOnJkZj0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMTk5 OS8wMi8yMi1yZGYtc3ludGF4LW5zIyI+IDxyZGY6RGVzY3JpcHRpb24gcmRmOmFib3V0PSIiIHht bG5zOnhtcE1NPSJodHRwOi8vbnMuYWRvYmUuY29tL3hhcC8xLjAvbW0vIiB4bWxuczpzdFJlZj0i aHR0cDovL25zLmFkb2JlLmNvbS94YXAvMS4wL3NUeXBlL1Jlc291cmNlUmVmIyIgeG1sbnM6eG1w PSJodHRwOi8vbnMuYWRvYmUuY29tL3hhcC8xLjAvIiB4bWxuczpkYz0iaHR0cDovL3B1cmwub3Jn L2RjL2VsZW1lbnRzLzEuMS8iIHhtcE1NOk9yaWdpbmFsRG9jdW1lbnRJRD0ieG1wLmRpZDo1Q0E0 MzE2NjI0MjA2ODExODA4MzhCNzkyRDU5QTgwRSIgeG1wTU06RG9jdW1lbnRJRD0ieG1wLmRpZDpE MDk3QTU4QUVDMjUxMUU0QjE1REM2Mjk5QTUwRDE1OCIgeG1wTU06SW5zdGFuY2VJRD0ieG1wLmlp ZDpEMDk3QTU4OUVDMjUxMUU0QjE1REM2Mjk5QTUwRDE1OCIgeG1wOkNyZWF0b3JUb29sPSJBZG9i ZSBQaG90b3Nob3AgQ1M1LjEgTWFjaW50b3NoIj4gPHhtcE1NOkRlcml2ZWRGcm9tIHN0UmVmOmlu c3RhbmNlSUQ9InhtcC5paWQ6Q0NGRjFDREFGNjIzNjgxMUI3NzhEQTFDMEIyQjEwOEYiIHN0UmVm OmRvY3VtZW50SUQ9InhtcC5kaWQ6NUNBNDMxNjYyNDIwNjgxMTgwODM4Qjc5MkQ1OUE4MEUiLz4g PGRjOnRpdGxlPiA8cmRmOkFsdD4gPHJkZjpsaSB4bWw6bGFuZz0ieC1kZWZhdWx0Ij5BZG9iZSBQ aG90b3Nob3AgUERGPC9yZGY6bGk+IDwvcmRmOkFsdD4gPC9kYzp0aXRsZT4gPC9yZGY6RGVzY3Jp cHRpb24+IDwvcmRmOlJERj4gPC94OnhtcG1ldGE+IDw/eHBhY2tldCBlbmQ9InIiPz7/7QBIUGhv dG9zaG9wIDMuMAA4QklNBAQAAAAAAA8cAVoAAxslRxwCAAACAAIAOEJJTQQlAAAAAAAQ/OEfici3 yXgvNGI0B1h36//iDFhJQ0NfUFJPRklMRQABAQAADEhMaW5vAhAAAG1udHJSR0IgWFlaIAfOAAIA CQAGADEAAGFjc3BNU0ZUAAAAAElFQyBzUkdCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD21gABAAAAANMtSFAgIAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEWNwcnQAAAFQAAAA M2Rlc2MAAAGEAAAAbHd0cHQA

Скачать книгу