Project: Parenthood. Trish Wylie
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she should have done was crack a joke or step away. She most certainly shouldn’t have stood rooted to the one spot and watched while his head descended.
She knew how big a mistake it was the minute his mouth touched hers.
Oh, no.
In that first touch of lips it was as if something she hadn’t even known existed inside her woke up. It started with warmth where their mouths met, a sensual awareness of connecting with another person. Then the warmth moved from her mouth to her chest, causing her breath to catch and her heart to beat louder. Then there was the spiralling, tightening sensation low in her abdomen. All in one kiss. All in the space of a few minutes.
It frightened the life clean out of her. This was exactly what she had sworn she would never allow to happen to her. For a few brief moments she was losing control, was stepping into the abyss. But, unlike so many people who had no idea of what there could be at the bottom of that abyss, Teagan knew. She knew.
Heartbreak, agony, self-doubt, sacrifice. Pain.
She was twenty-one years old, with no experience of physical attraction on such a level. But she knew what the emotional cost was. And she wouldn’t do that to either of them.
‘No.’ The word came out on a tortured whisper. ‘You shouldn’t have done that. We can’t—’
‘Yes, we can.’ He squeezed his arms tighter around her waist. ‘You had to know this was going to happen.’
She tugged back against his arms. ‘I knew no such thing! We’re supposed to be friends.’
‘That’s a good place to start.’
‘No, it’s a good way of gaining ammunition, is what it is. You have no idea what you’d be getting into.’
He obviously had no idea what she meant. The look on his face told her that. And in that second she knew she was right to do what she was doing. He didn’t know her as well as he thought he did. That wasn’t his fault. Because with Brendan she’d had her first chance to live in a land of make-believe. Someone who had led as charmed a life as he had could only believe that everyone else’s life had been as easy. So it had been simple to play along.
But the very fact that it was hurting her so much to reject him only proved that she was right to do it. If she got any more involved than she already was then she might not survive. She might end up exactly like her parents.
‘I can’t believe you did this.’ She finally managed to get free from his hold, her eyes flashing up at him as she did her best not to cry. ‘You’ve ruined everything.’
‘With one wee kiss? How have I ruined everything?’ He shook his head and stepped towards her again, his eyes flickering around to see who could hear their argument, ‘You’re acting like some hysterical female, Teagan. Stop it.’
The condescending tone was like a slap in the face, ‘How dare you?’
‘Teagan—’ His tone became more warning.
‘Don’t you Teagan me! Try finding someone who wants you to kiss them, Brendan. There are loads of women here who might want that from you. But I’m not one of them.’ She raised her chin a very visibly stubborn inch and glared at him. ‘Get over yourself.’
Without waiting for a response she turned and, like Cinderella running from the ball, fled across the room, the sound of her name in his deep voice echoing behind her.
She swore there and then that she would never see him again. Ever. He could think that was immature or stupid if he wanted to. In fact he could think whatever the hell he liked.
All he had done was show her that the path she’d chosen for herself was the right one. She would never let anyone get to her like he just had. She would only ever have herself to look out for, pure and simple.
And they’d be selling ice cream in hell before she changed her mind again.
CHAPTER ONE
‘YOU can’t do this to me now!’
Eimear lowered her voice and blinked shimmering eyes at her. ‘Teagan, I wouldn’t ask if this wasn’t really important. It could be make or break for us. I need this time with Mac to sort it out or we could be through.’
‘I get that, Eimear. I do. But I can’t look after them now.’ She glanced over at the three small faces blinking at her from the doorway, guilt rising up in her throat like bile that they were having to hear her turn them away, rejecting them. ‘Maybe next weekend some time. I have this massive deal in work and—’
‘This is my life we’re talking about! I can’t lose him, Teagan. I really can’t.’
And now she was crying. Teagan couldn’t take it when Eimear cried. And she especially couldn’t take it when it was happening in front of her nephew and nieces. Even though technically their mother’s back was to them. Teagan really couldn’t put them through any of the stuff she remembered from her own childhood. It would be too cruel.
But surely it wasn’t unreasonable to have asked for a little warning? A phone call to discuss it? A text message to say they were on their way over? Not a carload of them outside of her house when she got home from work…
‘Eimear—’
‘Please. I’m begging you.’
It had been a long time since Teagan had really felt that Eimear needed her. Things just hadn’t been the same between them over the years since Eimear’s first marriage. A marriage that Teagan had felt never should have happened to begin with. She’d said so. Loudly and at length, in fact. And Eimear had never really forgiven her for it, so their relationship had changed.
But seeing Eimear so desperate now was like looking back in time. And it brought out Teagan’s old need to soothe and to make things better.
Her eyes moved again to the three children. The eldest, Johnnie, was looking at her with eyes the same colour as his mother’s. He almost looked as if he was examining her, sizing her up. And even while she stood contemplating how to get out of looking after them she felt as if she was falling short of his expectations.
She took a long breath. ‘How long for?’
‘Thank you!’ Eimear engulfed her in a swift, tight hug, her tears gone. ‘I knew I could rely on you.’
Teagan scowled, suddenly feeling she’d just been hoodwinked. ‘They’ll need—’
‘They have everything they need right there. It’s all pretty self-explanatory. And Meggie is potty trained now, so she just needs a nappy on at night. It’s a pull-on, so you’ll be grand.’
She was still scowling while her sister became a hurricane around the room, hugging and kissing the children and moving towards the door. ‘We’ll only be a few days. Mac has booked some lovely country hideaway for us.’
‘How will I—?’
‘Thanks, Teagan. You really are a star.’
And she was gone.
Teagan blinked at the closed door. What had just happened? Not half an hour ago she’d had a bubble bath, scented candles and a glass of good Chardonnay planned for her evening. Now she was staring at three small faces that looked as bewildered as she felt.
She pinned a bright smile on her face as she approached them. But it took about thirty seconds for the smallest one to crumple.
‘Oh, no, honey. Don’t do that.’
And then the second one began to sniffle. Only Johnnie remained impassive.
It was Teagan’s worst nightmare.
Brendan hated moving days. This time would definitely be the last one for a few dozen years if he had his way.
He lugged a box from his rental