12 Communication Skills

       Sandra Buerger

       Department of Natural Sciences and Mathematics, Boston University, College of General Studies, Boston, MA, USA

12.1 Introduction

      Communication extends to both your personal life and the workplace. The aim of this chapter is to examine workplace and academic interactions; however, many of these topics will overlap into both realms of life. The main aspects of effective communication to be discussed briefly here include:

First, we must define communication. Communication is described by Pfeiffer (1998) as the ability to make thoughts, feelings, and needs known to another and the reception of that information from the other person. However simple that may sound, there are many factors that influence how those messages are sent and received. It is the aim of this section to give an overview of some of these factors and help you become aware of how they affect communication. The sections below will take the seven factors listed above into account when discussing what constitutes effective communication.

12.2 Effective Communication

      Emotional intelligence (EI) is defined as the ability to understand the motivations of the self and of others that you interact with. Emotional intelligence also includes the ability to express empathy and understanding to those around you (Salovey and Mayer 1990). The cultivation of emotional intelligence and the use of emotional intelligence in your interactions with peers and colleagues is a theme that runs through the other tenets of communication listed above. You can also refer back to Chapter 11 where the topic of emotional intelligence was covered in more detail.

      When communicating with others, it is important to keep an open mind and listen to what others have to say. This brings us back to the idea of emotional intelligence. Listening to others speak has been shown to relate to a higher level of emotional intelligence and more effective communication. Studies have shown that deliberate attention to listening and modeling of conscious listening have been effective tools in increasing effective communication (Ioannidou and Konstantikaki 2008).

      In fact, there is much interest in the idea of active listening and tolerance of the viewpoint of the other person and how that influences effective communication. When people act aggressively or insult each other, the predictable outcome is a hostile situation in which the two speakers perceive each other as adversaries. This results in a shutdown of communication. One possible way around this situation is to avoid insulting people when expressing your viewpoint, look for common ground, and resist the urge to define a difference of opinion as an insurmountable obstacle to effective communication (Waugh 2014).

      One particularly good demonstration of effective communication that involves tolerance and open‐mindedness is the relationship between the teacher and the student. Thomas Gordon (2003) describes effective communication between teachers and students. Although his work focuses on the teacher−student relationship, we can apply many of the lessons to other situations. Gordon discusses the need for awareness of the other person's needs in the conversation and how to ensure you are sending messages that will result in effective communication with the other person. He describes a number of phrases that can shut down communication by sending messages of lack of acceptance, inadequacies, and faults. Some of these include ordering or commanding, moralizing, judging, stereotyping, and labeling. These types of messages, along with others, shut down communication and don't result in an effective exchange (Gordon 2003).

The solution is to engage in active listening. Verbalizing what the other person is saying can be helpful in promoting an understanding between people. This involves mirroring or restating what the other person has said. This helps in two major ways. One, the person hears back what they are trying to communicate and can revise their statement if what they hear is not what they were trying to say. Two, it sends the message that you are truly listening to what the other person is saying and shows concern and interest (Gordon 2003).

      In addition to listening, you must also put aside your personal biases to interpret the message. Here, again, we see the importance of tolerance of a different viewpoint. Once you feel you have understood what the other person is saying and looked at it from that person's viewpoint, you can respond. Your response should be careful and thought out and avoid insults. The idea is to avoid hostile negativity, such as defining an idea as “stupid,” but to still express your own thoughts (Gordon 2003; Waugh 2014).

      Active listening and tolerance of others' viewpoints is a skill that should be practiced and demonstrated to others (Ioannidou and Konstantikaki 2008). Active listening, along with thoughtful responses that avoid hostility, will promote objectivity in the response. All of these strategies will help reduce conversations that are charged with emotion or characterize the speaker based on past experiences or stereotypes without hearing the message that is being expressed.

      In addition to the interpretation part of communication, you must also be able to effectively express your own ideas. A number of factors can help your ideas come across clearly and advance communication. These verbal skills are vital to effective communication (Pfeiffer 1998; Mikoluk 2014).

      Consistency and honestly in the expression of your thoughts is vital. Consistency refers to the ability to stay on point. Avoid going off on tangents that will cause the other person in the exchange to lose interest or become confused. This is also directly related to the idea of clarity. Use words and terms that the listener will be familiar with and avoid the use of jargon (Mikoluk 2014). Be aware of your audience and their background. You do not want to communicate complex technical ideas to first‐year undergraduates and, at the same time, you do not want to explain basic concepts to experts in the field. In order to keep the listener's attention, you must tailor your communication to your audience.

      When speaking, you should communicate with confidence in your ideas. You should be assertive, but not aggressive. This will reduce hostility in the response from your audience. Exhibit flexibility in your ideas and your method of communication.

      Our final consideration in this overview of effective