The Delights of Wisdom Pertaining to Conjugial Love. Emanuel Swedenborg
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91. But that the female is born to be a subject of the will (ut sit voluntaria), yet a subject of the will as grounded in the intellectual principle of the man, or what is the same, to be the love of the man's wisdom, because she was formed through his wisdom, (on which subject see above, n. 88, 89,) may also appear from the female's affection, application, manners, and form. From her AFFECTION, which is the affection of loving knowledge, intelligence, and wisdom; nevertheless not in herself but in the man; and thus of loving the man: for the man (vir) cannot be loved merely on account of his form, in that he appears as a man (homo), but on account of the talent with which he is gifted, which causes him to be a man. From her APPLICATION; in that it is to such manual works as knitting, needlework, and the like, serving for ornament, both to decorate herself and to exalt her beauty: and moreover from her application to various domestic duties, which connect themselves with the duties of men, which, as was said, relate to public offices. They are led to these duties from an inclination to marriage, that they may become wives, and thereby one with their husbands. That the same is also discoverable from their MANNERS and FORM, needs no explanation.
92. V. FROM THE INFLUX OF THE MARRIAGE OF GOOD AND TRUTH FROM THE LORD, THE LOVE OF THE SEX AND CONJUGIAL LOVE ARE DERIVED. That good and truth are the universals of creation, and thence are in all created subjects; and that they are in created subjects according to the form of each; and that good and truth proceed from the Lord not as two but as one, was shewn above, n. 84–87: from these considerations it follows, that the UNIVERSAL CONJUGIAL SPHERE proceeds from the Lord, and pervades the universe from its primaries to its ultimates; thus from angels even to worms. The reason why such a sphere of the marriage of good and truth proceeds from the Lord, is, because it is also the sphere of propagation, that is, of prolification and fructification; and this sphere is the same with the divine providence relating to the preservation of the universe by successive generations. Now since this universal sphere, which is that of the marriage of good and truth, flows into its subjects according to the form of each, see n. 86, it follows that the male receives it according to his form, thus in the intellect, because he is in an intellectual form; and that the female receives it according to her form, thus in the will, because she is a form of the will grounded in the intellect of the man; and since that sphere is also the sphere of prolification, it follows that hence is the love of the sex.
93. The reason why conjugial love also is from this same source, is, because that sphere flows into the form of wisdom with men, and also with angels; for a man may increase in wisdom to the end of his life in the world, and afterwards to eternity in heaven; and in proportion as he increases in wisdom, his form is perfected; and this form receives not the love of the sex, but the love of one of the sex; for with one of the sex it may be united to the inmost principles in which heaven with its felicities consists, and this union is conjugial love.
94. VI. THE LOVE OF THE SEX BELONGS TO THE EXTERNAL OR NATURAL MAN, AND HENCE IT IS COMMON TO EVERY ANIMAL. Every man is born corporeal, and becomes more and more interiorly natural, and in proportion as he loves intelligence he becomes rational, and afterwards, if he loves wisdom, he becomes spiritual. What the wisdom is by which a man becomes spiritual, will be shewn in the following pages, n. 130. Now as a man advances from knowledge into intelligence, and from intelligence into wisdom, so also his mind changes its form; for it is opened more and more, and conjoins itself more nearly with heaven, and by heaven with the Lord; hence it becomes more enamored of truth, and more desirous of the good of life. If therefore he halts at the threshold in the progression to wisdom, the form of his natural mind remains; and this receives the influx of the universal sphere, which is that of the marriage of good and truth, in the same manner as it is received by the inferior subjects of the animal kingdom—beasts and birds; and as these are merely natural, the man in such case becomes like them, and thereby loves the sex just as they do. This is what is meant by the assertion—the love of the sex belongs to the external or natural man, and hence it is common to every animal.
95. VII. BUT CONJUGIAL LOVE BELONGS TO THE INTERNAL OR SPIRITUAL MAN; AND HENCE THIS LOVE IS PECULIAR TO MAN. The reason why conjugial love belongs to the internal or spiritual man is, because in proportion as a man becomes more intelligent and wise, in the same proportion he becomes more internal and spiritual, and in the same proportion the form of his mind is more perfected; and this form receives conjugial love: for therein it perceives and is sensible of a spiritual delight, which is inwardly blessed, and a natural delight thence arising, which derives its soul, life, and essence from the spiritual delight.
96. The reason why conjugial love is peculiar to man, is because he only can become spiritual, he being capable of elevating his intellect above his natural loves, and from that state of elevation of seeing them beneath him, and of judging of their quality, and also of amending, correcting, and removing them. No other animal can do this; for the loves of other animals are altogether united with their inborn knowledge; on which account this knowledge cannot be elevated into intelligence, and still less into wisdom; in consequence of which every other animal is led by the love implanted in his knowledge, as a blind person is led through the streets by a dog. This is the reason which conjugial love is peculiar to man; it may also be called native and near akin to him; because man has the faculty of growing wise, with which faculty this love is united.
97. VIII. WITH MAN CONJUGIAL LOVE IS IN THE LOVE OF THE SEX AS A GEM IN ITS MATRIX. As this however is merely a comparison, we will explain it in the article which immediately follows: this comparison also illustrates what was shown just above, n. 94, 95—that the love of the sex belongs to the external or natural man, and conjugial love to the internal or spiritual man.
98. IX. THE LOVE OF THE SEX WITH MAN IS NOT THE ORIGIN OF CONJUGIAL LOVE, BUT ITS FIRST RUDIMENT; THUS IT IS LIKE AN EXTERNAL NATURAL PRINCIPLE, IN WHICH AN INTERNAL SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLE IS IMPLANTED. The subject here treated of is love truly conjugial, and not ordinary love, which also is called conjugial, and which with some is merely the limited love of the sex. Love truly conjugial exists only with those who desire wisdom, and who consequently advance more and more into wisdom. These the Lord foresees, and provides for them conjugial love; which love indeed commences with them from the love of the sex, or rather by it; but still it does not originate in it; for it originates in proportion to the advancement in wisdom and the dawning of the light thereof in man; for wisdom and that love are inseparable companions. The reason why conjugial love commences by the love of the sex is, because before a suitable consort is found, the sex in general is loved and regarded with a fond eye, and is treated with civility from a moral ground: for a young man has to make his choice; and while this is determining, from an innate inclination to marriage with one, which lies concealed in the interiors of his mind, his external receives a gentle warmth. A further reason is, because determinations to marriage are delayed from various causes even to riper years, and in the mean time the beginning of that love is as lust; which with some actually goes astray into the love of the sex; yet with them it is indulged no further than may be conducive to health. This, however, is to be understood as spoken of the male sex, because it has enticements which actually inflame it; but not of the female sex. From these considerations it is evident that the love of the sex is not the origin of love truly conjugial; but that it is its first rudiment in respect to time, yet not in respect to end; for what is first in respect to end, is first in the mind and its intention, because it is regarded as primary; but to this first there is no approaching unless successively through mediums, and these are not first in themselves, but only conducive to what is first in itself.
99.