The Essential Works of U. G. Krishnamurti. U. G. Krishnamurti
Читать онлайн книгу.
Somewhere along the line it is bound to dawn on you — you know it is not taking you anywhere.
But the hope keeps you going — the hope that one day through the same thing you will probably reach your goal — because that instrument (i.e. thought) is born out of time, is born out of cause and effect, and it cannot conceive of anything except in terms of time. So if time is not there, there is nothing to happen — let alone in the future — because it is time that has created the need for the timeless. 'Time' means the 'future'. If this time is cut off, it is not as if what you expect to happen will happen now. There is nothing to happen here. Time burns itself out when the timeless is knocked off.
Whatever you want to happen is in terms of time. Assuming for a moment that you are already in the blissful state, you don't want to be in that state tomorrow. Whatever the state you want to be in, you are not in that state, because the goal is there, which is tomorrow, not today. So if this (goal) is not there, the thought which is thinking in terms of something happening in time is not there. Unfortunately, there is nothing to happen. Happening is in time. When time is not there, there is no happening, nothing to happen there. Atman is Brahman — that is exactly what it means — the Brahman you want in the future is already here; there is nothing to happen here. Achieving (it doesn't matter what you call it) is in time, so it is bound to be caught up in cause and effect. You want to produce a result, but this is not a result, not a happening, not an achievement.
_______
Anything you do with this will cause you pain — that is why I say the search for moksha (liberation) is the dukkha (suffering) of all dukkhas. (Laughter) There's no end to that — you will keep searching for this eternally — you are not going to get it. Even if you get what you want, and experience bliss, beatitude, God knows what, there is always more and more of it. Silence you experience, but you want permanent silence, you want always to be in silence. But in the very nature of things, there is no permanence at all. You have never lived with these (liberated) people (I do not know if there are any).
_______
It's a very simple thing. It's so simple that the complex structure does not want to leave it alone. There's nothing that you can do, of course; you are condemned. (laughs) You are condemned.
Q: So leave it alone
UG: Leave it alone.
Q: We can't do that either.
UG: You don't seem to be able to do that either.
Q: If we can leave it alone, then we have done everything.
UG: Then there's nothing to happen.
Q: We wouldn't be here if we had left it alone.
Q: But he said "You don't get anything by coming here."
UG: You can stay with that man all your life — nothing is going to happen.
Q: We haven't realized that nothing we can do....
UG: You cannot say "There isn't anything that I can do." You see, the moment you come to that point "There isn't anything that I can do about it!" then you don't have to do anything, neither letting go nor.... No outside agency can be of any help.
Q: Nor the inside agency?
UG: Then there is no inside there, no outside — the inside is always related to the outside, you understand?
So you don't even complete the sentence "There isn't anything that I can do about it"; even before the completion of that sentence "There isn't anything I can do about it," (Snaps his fingers) it has done the trick. The triggering apparatus is part of you — it's there.
________________
Q: I have what may seem like a silly question. Do you practice meditation?
UG: Nothing — no meditations — nothing. What is there to meditate upon? I discovered all those things before — the mantras, the meditations, what meditation does. I didn't practice, of course, Transcendental Meditation or any such thing; but some meditations. So, this I discovered for myself: meditation is a self-centered activity. It is strengthening the very self you want to be free from. What are you meditating for? You want to be free from something. What are you to meditate on? All right, thought is a noise, sound. What is sound? You look at this and you say "This is a tape-recorder," so thought is sound. There is a continuous flow of thoughts, and you are linking up all these thoughts all the time, and this is the noise you can't stand. Why can't you stand that noise? So, by repeating mantras, you create a louder noise, and you submerge the noise of thought, and then you are at peace with yourself. You think that something marvelous is happening to you. But all meditation is a self- centered activity.
I don't talk of a meditative state. That is Krishnamurti's business — he talks about a meditative state: "It is not this; it is not that." All right, if this is a meditative state, what am I meditating upon? I am meditating upon that (Indicates some object) at this moment — looking at that. The reflecting of that is here. Something is moving — movement — life is movement. All the time something or the other is happening there — all the time — and the movement there is the movement here. There is no moment when something or the other is not happening. In the night everything is silent for a moment, or you hear the lizards making noises. You have to listen to them. If there is no noise of any kind around you, you have to listen to the 'lub-dub' of your heart, or to the flow of your blood through your veins like a river. That is noise. You can delude yourself and imagine that it is omkara (the mystical sound 'om'). It is not omkara. This (body) is a machine. The human machine produces noise just as a running car engine does. Why do you have to say it is omkara, brahmanadam and all that? It is the noise of the human machine. You will go crazy if you listen to the 'lub-dub-lub-dub' of your own heart. But that is all there is to listen to here unless some other thing is happening — somebody coughing, somebody snoring or somebody having nightmares.
______
There is not one moment of boredom for this man. For hours and hours I can sit here and watch the clock pendulum moving there — I can't be bored — I really don't know what it is. The pendulum is moving there — the whole of my being is that movement. For hours and hours I can sit here and look at it. You are not interested in that thing; you are interested in something else, some meditation. This individual is always in a state of meditation. "Where is that movement?" I am wondering — that is the meditation that is going on. Not that I am wondering in the usual sense of the word; this individual remains in a state of wonder for the rest of his life. 'Outside' and 'inside' are created by thought. When there is no movement of thought, you don't know whether it is inside or outside. This is just like a mirror. This is a live mirror reflecting things exactly as they are. There is nobody here: I don't see anything; the whole of my body is reflecting things exactly the way they are out there.
The recognizing and naming mechanism is in the background except when there is a need for it. This absence of the movement of thought which recognizes and names things is the state of samadhi, sahaja (natural) samadhi. You imagine that samadhi is something he goes into and comes out of. Not at all; he's always there. Whether the eyes of such a man are open or closed, he does not know what he is looking at.
A person who has come into such a state of samadhi is like a madman and a child rolled into one. Madcaps function in exactly the same way — the thoughts are disconnected, disjointed things, and so the actions are also disconnected, the feelings are also disconnected. But their thoughts are accompanied by hallucinations, mental images, seeing something that isn't there — that's the only difference. This state is always a state of wonder; he doesn't know what he is looking at, he doesn't know what he is smelling, and yet his senses are working at their peak capacities,