A Head Full of Everything. Gavin Oattes
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You're also trying to discover the world too. But this time you've got every single stress imaginable on your shoulders. Friends, looks, parents, social media, exams, boys, girls, expectations, etc., etc.
The media paints a picture. They tell us you're all obsessed with sex and drugs. Apparently, you all sit on a lot of benches and get drunk, causing trouble.
Anytime I was unhappy or going through a tough time, my parents used to tell me it was down to hormones. Great, thanks for the helpful advice during this awful experience that I'm having, glad to hear it's just hormones….
Truth is, teenagers are decent human beings. I'm pretty sure you know very well that the choices you make now will affect the rest of your life. You don't need to hear this every single day. There's not a single teenager out there who aspires to live a life of regret.
For many it sucks to be a teenager. Treated like a child, expected to act like an adult.
Well, I've written this book to show you it doesn't have to suck. And when it does, there's some cool things you can do to make it suck a little less. See, you're not a child and you're not quite a proper adult yet either. You're a teenager.
When I was 11, I thought life would be better when I was a teenager. At 13, I couldn't wait to be 15. At 15, I was chasing 17. And at 17, I just wanted to be 21.
It all moves so fast and many of us are in such a hurry to grow up that we forget what it means to be young. Many are so focussed on the future that they forget to enjoy where they're at, right now.
What's the rush? Slow down.
In fact, let's slow down so much for a moment and put things firmly in reverse….
Thiiiiiiiiiis Much Excited!
Think back to when you were 5 years old. Everything was magic. Even school, right from day 1.
I was reminded of this when my own son started school.
‘YOU'VE GOT A SON, GAV?! JUST HOW OLD ARE YOU?’ We'll get to this later….
My son's name is Kian and at only 5 years of age he served up a perfect – and very much needed – lesson in life. And I'll never forget it.
His first day at school was, bizarrely, a Friday. It was a two‐hour taster visit and then he'd start his first full day the following week. I woke up on the Monday of that week to discover Kian stood beside me at 6 am dressed in full school uniform. I reminded him that his first day was in fact Friday.
‘I know,’ he replied firmly, ‘can't you tell what I'm doing?’
I thought about it and replied, ‘No idea!’
‘I'm practising.’
He practised on Tuesday, he practised on Wednesday and of course on Thursday. He forgot on the actual Friday, but we'll let him off as he was knackered from all his early mornings, but that's not the point.
I woke him on Friday, and he leaped out of bed, threw his uniform on and came sprinting into our room. My wife and I smiled weary early‐morning‐parenting smiles.
I told Kian that I'd never seen him this excited before in his entire life. He agreed wholeheartedly.
‘That's because I've never been this excited in my entire life.’
There was a brief pause before he delivered the best bit.
‘And I've been alive for five years!’
‘In fact Dad, I'll show you how excited I am. I am THIIIIIS MUCH EXCITED!’
Please picture a 5‐year‐old with his arms stretched so wide they're almost touching behind his back. Shoulder blades touching.
As a teenager, you can probably remember being 5. Pretty much everything's exciting at that age, so to be beyond ‘normal’ excitement and to have ventured into ‘THIIIIIS much excited’ – we're in ‘Christmas Eve/Disneyland’ territory. Or ‘Disneyland on Christmas Eve’ territory, something of which I have never experienced but I can begin to imagine just how exciting this is.
That morning, my wife and I had a wonderful discussion about how, in that moment, there were thousands of young kids all waking up feeling the same – buzzing, pumped and ready to go. Raring to throw themselves into the next step of life's adventure. The same adventure that you're still on.
We continued to talk about how amazing it is that some people remain like that throughout life. Every single step of the journey, we meet them, the infectious energy they have, the buzz.
And then we had a really weird discussion about how some people never feel like that again. Something goes, fizzles out, vanishing entirely for some.
Could it be that some people peak at 5?
There is, of course, a downside to taking the next step in your adventure. Fear. Worry. Stress. Anxiety. You are excited and yet it's tinged with what might go wrong. It might not work. Failure is an actual thing. You know because, as a teenager, you've experienced it.
But when you're 4 or 5 these feelings can be somewhat new and confusing.
Fee‐Fi‐Fo‐Fum
So there I was, week 1 of Primary School. Five years old and learning to fit in, whatever that means.
It was Friday, the final day of week 1. My school experience so far had been outstanding. New friends, old friends, Hide ‘n’ Seek and as much ‘Heads Down Thumbs Up’ as I could possibly imagine.
Magic.
We came back into the class after Playtime fresh from a game of ‘Tig’. The Head Teacher, Miss Smart (real name) popped in for a chat.
‘Good Morning boys and girls.’
‘Goooooood Mmmmoooorrnning Miiiisss Smaart.’
Miss Smart was about to tell us something that would be a game changer for me.
‘Boys and girls, for the first time ever, this Christmas, we are going to put on a school pantomime.’
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. A pantomime, in my new school. I loved pantomime.
‘Not only are we putting on a pantomime boys and girls but we need some of you to be in it.’
Well, this just about sent me over the edge. My school were putting on a pantomime and some of us were going to be in it! I couldn't wait to tell my mum and dad.
‘The Pantomime we will be doing this year is Jack & The Beanstalk.’
My absolute favourite pantomime ever. I could see it in my mind. The giant's enormous mechanical legs walking across the stage as ‘fee‐fi‐fo‐fum’ rings out across the theatre.
‘We need 5 pupils from this class to be the mice who run on stage every night and steal the giant's cheese.’
Mind. Blown.
I was imagining myself sitting in the audience with snacks‐a‐plenty. I could see the mice, the cheese and again, the giant's legs. And me. I could picture it. It was going to be hilarious.
I