How to get married and not to get divorced in a couple of months. Manual for newlyweds. Инна Кирюшина
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I deliberately do not use the word “beloved”, because this is not always the case, but on the contrary, more often it comes to meetings people you like or you need this person for one reason or another.
And we start to pretend we are not in reality: miserly – generous, lazy – quick, dirty – neat, etc. But time runs, and after a couple of months you can observe changes in the behavior and mood of the partner. Most of them are noticeable for those who begin to live together and communicate with a person every day. It becomes an unpleasant surprise for majority especially if you are in a hurry and have managed to “dirty” the passport with a marriage stamp. Moreover, it’s awful if the bride is pregnant or has already given birth and is completely unable and unwilling to take care of the child, or to take care of herself.
The last thing is the main fear for so many men – a fat and scruffy woman at home!
How to predict a similar metamorphosis? Is it possible to influence the situation? Of course, it’s possible! First of all, pay attention to her family: in what conditions did your girlfriend grow up, what was she used to? Neither any wealth in the family, nor the education play an important role. This is a question of habits, education, or personal qualities inherent in the individual. Anyway, it can be corrected. To tell the truth, in the case of habit it’s slower because if a girl isn’t used to do housework, then she will have that standard of cleanliness which was formed in her family or the place she was educated.
If she grew up in a family where certain habits were instilled from childhood – washing, cleaning, ironing – and she liked it and enjoyed it, so in new relationships she will do it without any enforcement, it is natural for her. But if she was forced to do this from childhood, then, most likely, she would not like to do household chores and she would try not to notice things and garbage lying around the house.
And here it is very important to start gently and tactfully engaging her in cleaning. First, together, and always praise for any initiative! Be patient! Even if she dyed your favorite shirt, having washed it with colored things; even if she chopped up a pile of dishes and the cookbook accidentally fell into the pan, praise her for her wonderful souptitles. All of this is not important! The main thing is that she began to budge and try. She is not your mother, she has no experience in managing a house, and it is very important for her to gain confidence in her abilities and skills, and you should help her with this!
Your task is to ignore these problems and praise her too salty soup, burnt cutlets, overroasted fish, awful pancakes and pies, stuffed with uneatable filling. Everything will be alright! Be patient to her work and efforts, and one day you will come to the house with a smell of delicious food. You will look around, kiss your little hostess and praise yourself for your intelligence, courage and pedagogical gift!
Summing up, we can say the following. Initially, when you have only met a person, ask yourself: “Who is she for me?” And if your answer is: “This is exactly the person I want to see next to me in five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five and etc. years ", then a surprise is waiting for you!
The fact is that a person’s character can change beyond recognition and changes every seven or ten years. For somebody, these are years of destruction and adversity, and one person becomes harder, more enduring and stress-resistant, while a different person breaks down under the weight of tests and begins to go with the flow. And your task is to determine who you have chosen for yourself. Will this person be what you imagine him to be? And won’t your girl return again to her habitual manner and habits which are so unpleasant to you? Should you give her any slack?
To summarize: a woman has a great need to talk to you. Even if you do not want to, you need to talk! About everything! Only by asking direct questions and getting full answers, discussing and listening to each other, you can build a real trust relationship with your woman.
And remember that only sincere and honest communication will lead to friendly relations. If a woman realizes that something is being concealed from her, that you get out of something, she begins to feel the danger and stop trusting her partner. And she begins to figure out! And she can imagine such a fantasy that you could ever dream of!
Chapter 3
Secrets of female sexuality
After the wedding night. He:
– Honey, I realize that I’m not the first!
She (smoking):
– Yes. And I realize that you’re not the last…
I have to say that the woman’s sexuality is a largely unexplored topic. And as more men are interested in it as more myths appear. Considering this topic from a physiological point of view, I will note that the effect of sex on marital life is extremely important for a woman.
When you first meet a woman, you pay attention to her external signs of sexuality: bosom, legs, waist. But this is only the top of the iceberg, and a completely inexperienced woman who knows nothing about her sexuality can be hidden behind external maturity.
What do you need to try to learn first?
1. Does she have any health problems (gynecology, thyroid gland, vascular diseases, diabetes mellitus)?
Do not be shy! Of course, these questions should be asked very correctly, but it’s impossible without them, because the health of her and her children is at stake. If there are problems, first of all she must heal and then plan to create a full-fledged family.
2. It is advisable to learn about her first relationship experience with a man: was it traumatic for her?
3. Does she have an orgasm?
4. What kind of sex does she prefer?
And let her laugh, but make her answer these key questions! Then you will understand how important it is to know because it will affect your whole life together. Let me explain why.
Women are great dreamers and actresses, but often this is what pushes them into the bottomless pit of lies and secrecy.
She is unpleasant, but she will depict pleasure. What for? Because it is accepted; in the stories of friends, movies, novels – everywhere they say that she should enjoy sex! And if it is not, then she must accept that not everything is all right with her. She is not accustomed to discuss these questions, there is practically no literature about this. I’m not talking about porn movies where every girl is a sex bomb with animal breeding instinct… Against this background, she really begins to feel differently – not like as it must be. He only touched her, and she already sighed and moaned, like she finished…
I'll tell you what you need to pay attention to, and what is not necessary.
She has already chosen you, which means that she undoubtedly likes you, and your task is «to be on top». Know and always remember that the main organ of pleasure is in her head! Yes, it is the place where the female orgasm is formed. And it is precisely this place that must be taken care of above all, rousing a woman. But from what place it will “flow” – that you will learn, having carefully studied it. The stuffed point G may not be between her legs at all, but somewhere under her knee or on her neck, and she can even change the dislocation… Study her, being very generous with your time, find out what she likes – tenderness, perseverance, speed or duration; in any case, I can say: the main thing – do not hurry!
Try to study the massage – starting from the feet, smoothly moving upwards along the body, gently stroking and cheering her on sexual exploits with soft movements. A woman is known to love with her ears, so do not forget to tell her how special, beautiful, and beloved she is. Do not forget to send her an SMS with declarations of love, but do not overdo it, otherwise she will think that you have nothing else to do. Pay special attention to her sleep: if a woman gets enough sleep, then her psychophysiological state will be in order and she will certainly try to please you too.
From a technical point of view, do not forget about additional ways to excite her: these are massagers and lubricants for intimacy with various pleasant effects, and sex toys, and everything that will help her to relax and enjoy as much as possible. Learn it: what touches her most? Eyes? Watch some erotic movie. Ears? Whisper to her, what a beauty she is. Touch? Often touch