"My Novel" — Complete. Эдвард Бульвер-Литтон
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in a catalogue?”
My uncle hesitates, when Mr. Caxton exclaims imperiously.—“The thing is settled! Don’t disturb Camarina.”
SQUILLS.—“If it be not too great a liberty, pray who or what is Camarina?”
MR. CAXTON.—“Camarina, Mr. Squills, was a lake, apt to be low, and then liable to be muddy; and ‘Don’t disturb Camarina’ was a Greek proverb derived from an oracle of Apollo; and from that Greek proverb, no doubt, comes the origin of the injunction, ‘Quieta non movere,’ which became the favourite maxim of Sir Robert Walpole and Parson Dale. The Greek line, Mr. Squills” (here my father’s memory began to warm), is preserved by Stephanus Byzantinus, ‘De Urbibus,’
[Greek proverb]
Zenobius explains it in his proverbs; Suidas repeats Zenobius; Lucian alludes to it; so does Virgil in the Third Book of the AEneid; and Silius Italicus imitates Virgil,—
“‘Et cui non licitum fatis Camarina moveri.’
“Parson Dale, as a clergyman and a scholar, had, no doubt, these authorities at his fingers’ end. And I wonder he did not quote them,” quoth my father; “but to be sure he is represented as a mild man, and so might not wish to humble the squire over-much in the presence of his family. Meanwhile, My Novel is My Novel; and now that, that matter is settled, perhaps the tongs, poker, and shovel may be picked up, the children may go to bed, Blanche and Kitty may speculate apart upon the future dignities of the Neogilos,—taking care, nevertheless, to finish the new pinbefores he requires for the present; Roland may cast up his account book, Mr. Squills have his brandy and water, and all the world be comfortable, each in his own way. Blanche, come away from the screen, get me my slippers, and leave Pisistratus to himself. [Greek line]—don’t disturb Camarina. You see, my dear,” added my father kindly, as, after settling himself into his slippers, he detained Blanche’s hand in his own,—“you see, my dear, every house has its Camarina. Alan, who is a lazy animal, is quite content to let it alone; but woman, being the more active, bustling, curious creature, is always for giving it a sly stir.”
BLANCHE (with female dignity).—“I assure you, that if Pisistratus had not called me, I should not have—”
MR. CAXTON (interrupting her, without lifting his eyes from the book he had already taken).—“Certainly you would not. I am now in the midst of the great Oxford Controversy. [The same Greek proverb]—don’t disturb Camarina.”
A dead silence for half-an-hour, at the end of which—
PISISTRATUS (from behind the screen).—“Blanche, my dear, I want to consult you.”
Blanche does not stir.
PISISTRATUS.—“Blanche, I say.” Blanche glances in triumph towards Mr. Caxton.
MR. CAXTON (laying down his theological tract, and rubbing his spectacles mournfully).—“I hear him, child; I hear him. I retract my vindication of man. Oracles warn in vain: so long as there is a woman on the other side of the screen, it is all up with Camarina.”
CHAPTER II
It is greatly to be regretted that Mr. Stirn was not present at the parson’s Discourse; but that valuable functionary was far otherwise engaged,—indeed, during the summer months he was rarely seen at the afternoon service. Not that he cared for being preached at,—not he; Mr. Stirn would have snapped his fingers at the thunders of the Vatican. But the fact was, that Mr. Stirn chose to do a great deal of gratuitous business upon the day of rest. The squire allowed all persons who chose to walk about the park on a Sunday; and many came from a distance to stroll by the lake, or recline under the elms. These visitors were objects of great suspicion, nay, of positive annoyance, to Mr. Stirn—and, indeed, not altogether without reason, for we English have a natural love of liberty, which we are even more apt to display in the grounds of other people than in those which we cultivate ourselves. Sometimes, to his inexpressible and fierce satisfaction, Mr. Stirn fell upon a knot of boys pelting the swans; sometimes he missed a young sapling, and found it in felonious hands, converted into a walking-stick; sometimes he caught a hulking fellow scrambling up the ha-ha to gather a nosegay for his sweetheart from one of poor Mrs. Hazeldean’s pet parterres; not infrequently, indeed, when all the family were fairly at church, some curious impertinents forced or sneaked their way into the gardens, in order to peep in at the windows. For these, and various other offences of like magnitude, Mr. Stirn had long, but vainly, sought to induce the squire to withdraw a permission so villanously abused. But though there were times when Mr. Hazeldean grunted and growled, and swore “that he would shut up the park, and fill it [illegally] with mantraps and spring-guns,” his anger always evaporated in words. The park was still open to all the world on a Sunday; and that blessed day was therefore converted into a day of travail and wrath to Mr. Stirn. But it was from the last chime of the afternoon-service bell until dusk that the spirit of this vigilant functionary was most perturbed; for, amidst the flocks that gathered from the little hamlets round to the voice of the pastor, there were always some stray sheep, or rather climbing, desultory, vagabond goats, who struck off in all perverse directions, as if for the special purpose of distracting the energetic watchfulness of Mr. Stirn. As soon as church was over, if the day were fine, the whole park became a scene animated with red cloaks or lively shawls, Sunday waistcoats and hats stuck full of wildflowers—which last Mr. Stirn often stoutly maintained to be Mrs. Hazeldean’s newest geraniums. Now, on this Sunday, especially, there was an imperative call upon an extra exertion of vigilance on the part of the superintendent,—he had not only to detect ordinary depredators and trespassers; but, first, to discover the authors of the conspiracy against the stocks; and, secondly, to “make an example.”
He had begun his rounds, therefore, from the early morning; and just as the afternoon bell was sounding its final peal, he emerged upon the village green from a hedgerow, behind which he had been at watch to observe who had the most suspiciously gathered round the stocks. At that moment the place was deserted. At a distance, the superintendent saw the fast disappearing forms of some belated groups hastening towards the church; in front, the stocks stood staring at him mournfully from its four great eyes, which had been cleansed from the mud, but still looked bleared and stained with the inarks of the recent outrage. Here Mr. Stirn paused, took off his hat, and wiped his brows.
“If I had sum ‘un to watch here,” thought he, “while I takes a turn by the water-side, p’r’aps summat might come out; p’r’aps them as did it ben’t gone to church, but will come sneaking round to look on their willany! as they says murderers are always led back to the place where they ha’ left the body. But in this here willage there ben’t a man, woman, or child as has any consarn for squire or parish, barring myself.” It was just as he arrived at that misanthropical conclusion that Mr. Stirn beheld Leonard Fairfield walking very fast from his own home. The superintendent clapped on his hat, and stuck his right arm akimbo. “Hollo, you, sir,” said he, as Lenny now came in hearing, “where be you going at that rate?”
“Please, sir, I be going to church.”
“Stop, sir,—stop, Master Lenny. Going to church!—why, the bell’s done; and you knows the parson is very angry at them as comes in late, disturbing the congregation. You can’t go to church now!”
“Please, sir—”
“I says you can’t go to church now. You must learn to think a little of others, lad. You sees how I sweats to serve the squire! and you must serve him too. Why, your mother’s got the house and premishes almost rent-free; you ought to have a grateful heart, Leonard Fairfield, and feel for his honour! Poor man! his heart is well-nigh bruk, I am sure, with the goings on.”
Leonard opened his innocent blue eyes, while Mr. Stirn dolorously wiped his own.
“Look at that ‘ere dumb cretur,” said Stirn, suddenly, pointing to the stocks,—“look at it. If it could speak, what would it say, Leonard Fairfield? Answer