The Edge of Never. J. Redmerski A.
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find anything interesting to look at, I pay more attention to the music behind me.
Is that …? You’ve got to be kidding me.
Feel Like Makin’ Love comes from the guy’s earbuds; I can tell at first by the distinctive guitar riff in the solo that everyone knows even if Bad Company isn’t their kind of music. I don’t hate classic rock, but I much prefer newer stuff. Give me Muse, Pink or The Civil Wars and I’m happy.
The earbuds dangling over the back of the seat and practically on my shoulder scare the crap out of me. My body jerks up and my hand flies over as if to slap away a bug that at first I think just landed on me.
“What the hell?” I say, looking up at the guy as he hovers over me again.
“You look bored,” he says. “You can borrow them if you want. Might not be your type of music, but hey, it’ll grow on you. I promise.”
I’m looking up at him with an awfully twisted face. Is this guy serious?
“Thanks, but no,” I say and go to turn around again.
“Why not?”
“Well, for one,” I say, “you’ve had those things stuck in your ears for the past several hours. Gross.”
“And?”
“What do you mean, and?” I think my face is just getting more twisted. “That’s not enough?”
He smiles that crooked smile again, which in the daylight I notice produces two tiny dimples near the corners of his lips.
“Well,” he says, reeling the earbuds back in, “you said ‘for one’; I just thought there might be another reason.”
“Wow,” I say, flabbergasted, “you are unbelievable.”
“Thanks.” He smiles and I can see all of his straight, white teeth.
I definitely didn’t mean that as a compliment, but something tells me he knows as much.
I go back to digging in my bag already knowing I’m not going to find anything but clothes, but it’s better than dealing with this weirdo.
He plops down on the empty seat next to me, just before another passenger walks past toward the restroom.
I just kind of freeze here, one hand buried inside my bag, unmoving. I may be looking right at him, but I have to let the shock wear off before I can actually figure out what kind of lecture I want to give him.
The guy reaches into his own bag and pulls out a little packet containing an antibacterial wipe, rips off the top half and unfolds the towelette. He wipes each earbud down thoroughly and then reaches over to me. “Like new,” he says, waiting for me to take them.
Seeing as how it actually seems like he’s trying to be nice, I let my defenses down just a little. “Really, I’m good. But thanks.” It surprises me at how fast I got over the whole sit-next-to-me-without-asking thing.
“You’re probably better off anyway,” he says, putting the MP3 player in his bag. “I don’t listen to Justin Bieber or that crazy meat-wearin’ bitch, so I guess you’ll just have to do without.”
OK, defenses are back up. Bring it on.
I snarl over at him, crossing my arms. “First off, I don’t listen to Justin Bieber. And second, Gaga isn’t so bad. Playing the shock-value card a little too long, I admit, but I like some of her stuff.”
“That’s shit music and you know it,” he replies and shakes his head.
I blink twice, just because I’m at a loss and don’t know what to say.
He puts his bag on the floor and leans back on the seat, propping one booted foot up on the back of the seat in front of him, but his legs are so long it looks uncomfortable to me. He’s wearing those stylish work-boot-looking things. Dr. Martens, I think. Dammit. Ian always wore those. I look away, not really in any mood to further this very strange conversation with this very strange person.
He looks over at me, his head pressed comfortably against the itchy fabric behind him. “Classic rock is where it’s at,” he says matter-of-factly and then gazes out ahead. “Zeppelin, the Stones, Journey, Foreigner.” He lets his head fall to the side to look over at me again. “Any of that ringing any bells?”
I scoff and roll my eyes again. “I’m not stupid,” I say, but then change my tune when I realize I can’t think of many classic rock bands and I don’t want to make myself look stupid after so eloquently saying that I’m not. “I like … Bad Company.”
A little grin lifts one side of his mouth. “Name one song by Bad Company and I’ll leave you alone about it.”
I’m nervous as hell now, trying to think of any song by Bad Company other than the one he had been listening to. I’m not going to look this guy in the face and say the words: I Feel Like Makin’ Love.
He waits patiently, that grin of his still in-tact.
“Ready For Love,” I say because it’s the only other one I can think of.
“Are you?” he asks.
“Huh?”
A smile etches deeper into his face. “Nothing,” he says, looking away.
I blush. I don’t know why and I don’t want to know why.
“Look,” I say, “do you mind? I was sort of using both seats.”
He smiles, this time without the smirk hiding behind his eyes. “Sure,” he says getting up. “But if you want to borrow my MP3 player, you know where it’s at.”
I smile thinly, relieved more than anything that he’s going to move back to his seat without a fight. “Thanks,” I say, appreciative, nonetheless.
Just before he makes it all the way back, he leans around the outside seat and says, “Where are you going, anyway?”
“Idaho.”
His bright green eyes seem to light up when he smiles. “Well, I’m heading to Wyoming, so looks like we’ll be sharing a few buses.” And then his smiling face disappears somewhere behind me.
I won’t deny that he’s attractive. The short, tousled haircut, the toned arms and sculpted cheekbones, the dimples and how that stupid fucking grin of his makes me more willing to look at him even though I don’t want to. But the reality is that it’s not like I’m into him, or anything—he’s a random stranger on a road-to-nowhere bus. No way in hell would I ever entertain something like that. And even if he wasn’t, even if I knew him for six months, I wouldn’t go there. Not ever. Not anymore.
The endless ride through Kansas seems to take longer than it should. Another hour and a half and my back and butt feel like stiff, hard pieces of meat. I’m constantly shifting on the seat, hoping to find some way to sit to relieve the tenderness, but I just end up making other parts of my body sore.
I’m only starting to regret this because the bus ride sucks.
I hear the bus intercom squeal once and then the driver’s voice:
“We’ll be stopping for a break in five minutes,” he says. “You will have fifteen minutes to grab a bite to eat before we get back on the road. Fifteen minutes. I will not wait longer, so if you’re not back in that time the bus will leave without you.” The speaker goes dead.
The announcement causes everyone to stir in their seats and gather their purses and such—nothing like talk of getting to stretch your legs after hours on a bus to wake everyone up.
We pull into a spacious lot where several semis are parked, and in between a convenience store, a car wash and a fast food restaurant. Passengers are standing up in the center of the aisle before the bus even comes to a stop. I’m one of them. My back hurts so bad.
We