Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 7 - 9. Derek Landy

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Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 7 - 9 - Derek Landy


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what to expect. I’ve heard so much about you, but not... not what you were like. I expected someone...”

      “Scary?”

      “You are scary.”

      “Violent, then?”

      “Yes. Maybe.”

      “I am a changed man. During the war, I was violent and bloodthirsty. When the war ended, I was violent and ruthless. During my reign, I have been violent and unyielding. Wherever I walk, I leave bloody footprints. But no more. Violence spreads misery, and I have grown tired of misery. Your friends in the Resistance, I would like to meet with them to forge a treaty, to go forward in peace.”

      “I don’t have friends in the Resistance.”

      “We both know you stand against me.”

      “But I don’t know anyone in the Resistance. I’m not from here, you said it yourself.”

      “Yet you have been noticed, Valkyrie. We noticed you, twice in the last few days. I’m sure you’ve come to the attention of the Resistance also.”

      “No, I’m telling you, I haven’t met any of them.”

      “Don’t take me for a fool, Valkyrie. I’m extending a hand in friendship.”

      “I’m sorry, I don’t—”

      Mevolent’s mouth twisted into a snarl beneath his veil and Vengeous struck Valkyrie across the face. She fell to her knees.

      “I try to be kind,” Mevolent murmured. “I offer an olive branch instead of a sword, and this is where it gets me. Insulted. Mocked.”

      “I wasn’t mocking you.”

      “You expect me to believe that someone like you has not caught the attention of the Resistance?”

      “Maybe I have,” she said, “but they haven’t been able to find me. I don’t want to join the Resistance.”

      “You’re lying to me.”

      “I’m not, I—”

      “Of course you are. You have to. You’re lying because your life is in danger. You’re lying because I could order Baron Vengeous to snap your neck and there’s nothing you could do to stop him, is there? Well?”

      “No,” she said. “There isn’t.”

      “So of course you’re lying. I expect you to lie. It’s only natural. You will lie until you run out of lies, and then you will tell the truth until you run out of truth, and then you will start lying again, telling us what you think we want to hear. We know this. It’s inevitable. It’s what happens. You will be no different to the hundreds, to the thousands, to the tens of thousands of people we’ve questioned.”

      Valkyrie kept her eyes away from Mevolent’s face. She was fully aware of how close Vengeous stood to her. It was times like these, back in her own reality, that Skulduggery Pleasant would break down the door and stride in with a joke and a bullet. God, she missed him. God, she wished he were here right now. What she wouldn’t give to see that door open and the Skeleton Detective walk—

      The door opened. Mevolent’s head moved slightly, his mouth twitching. A shadow at the door. Footsteps. Familiar footsteps. Skulduggery’s footsteps. A smile broke across her face. He’d found her. He’d used Nadir to follow her over and he’d found her and—

      He emerged from the doorway and Valkyrie’s heart sank. Blood drained from her face and she suddenly got so very cold.

      “Oh, no,” she whispered, as Lord Vile moved to stand beside the throne, his black armour lapping at the air around him.

      rskine Ravel was like one of those old movie stars, all dashing good looks and easy charm. He was, and Elsie had never actually used this word to describe anyone, simply captivating.

      And Ghastly was so completely and utterly cool. She’d been shocked at first, when she’d seen his scars, but she couldn’t remember anyone who made her feel quite so safe when she was in their company – her dad, maybe, back when she was a little girl, but that was it.

      They walked by those grey-clad men and women, and she caught sight of her reflection in the visors of their helmets. Walking alongside Ravel and Ghastly, she suddenly realised how ridiculous she looked. Fat, ugly, wearing clothes that she’d once thought disguised both of these facts. These were exceptional, magnificent people she was around, and who was she? Take away the powers she hated and she’d be back to being a nobody.

      They approached a blue wall of energy, on the other side of which four people in robes hovered a little off the ground with their eyes closed. Elsie was suddenly struck by how amazing this all was.

      One of the men smiled, though his eyes didn’t open. “Erskine,” he said. “Ghastly. Aren’t you two busy enough? Don’t you have a crisis to control?”

      “We’re never too busy for old friends,” said Ravel. “We just thought we’d come down, see how you were, see if you needed anything. A snack. A magazine. Maybe a bathroom break.”

      “You can’t stop Argeddion.”

      “Who said anything about Argeddion? I didn’t even mention his name. I wasn’t even thinking about him. But since you’ve brought him up, Tyren, you are absolutely right. We can’t stop him. Not without your help.”

      Tyren’s smile widened. “You really think we’re going to lift a finger against him? After what we did? He deserves freedom.”

      “Years ago, yes, he did. You made a mistake, and you weren’t the only one. Meritorious should never have agreed to your plan. But now? It’s too late. The point can be argued that you made him into exactly the kind of threat you feared, but I’m not one for assigning blame. That’s not how this Council of Elders works. We are all about redemption, though, and this is your chance to redeem yourself. Elsie O’Brien,” Ravel said, “I’d like you to meet Tyren Lament. Tyren and his friends have been infected with the same magic as you. Tyren, say hello to Elsie.”

      Tyren Lament turned his head slightly, as though he could see her through his eyelids. “I thought I recognised a kindred spirit. Hello, Elsie, how are you today? You know, by rights you should be over here on this side, with us.”

      Ghastly raised his eyebrow at her. “Well? It’s up to you.”

      “Uh, no,” she said. “No thank you. No offence, sir, but you’re... you’re kind of creeping me out.”

      Lament laughed, and the other robed people chuckled. “Fair enough, fair enough,” said Lament. “So is this your tactic, gentlemen? Bring a lovely young lady down to us just so she can make fun of our sandals?”

       “This isn’t a tactic,” said Ravel. “We just thought Elsie would like to see the first people gifted with a slice of Argeddion’s power. What do you think, Elsie?”

      She hesitated. “Am I going to end up like them?” she asked quietly.

      “No,” Ghastly said, shaking his head. “Argeddion’s been controlling their will for the last few years, that’s why they’re like this.”

      “It’s really not as bad as it sounds,” Lament said.

      She peered at him. “But how do you do things? How do you talk to us? Is he controlling what you say?”

      “That’s not really how it works. Think of it like this – ages ago, Argeddion sat us all down and had a conversation, and during that conversation he made us see that we were wrong, and he was right.


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