The Marked Men Series Books 1–6: Rule, Jet, Rome, Nash, Rowdy, Asa. Jay Crownover
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on me enough times to know that it was there, but she didn’t seem to care either way. She let the pad of her thumb brush across the top ball of it, which made me suck in a breath.
I realized I was letting this girl call all the shots. I was about to have sex with her and we had barely said a word; she was touching me, making me go crazy and I was just letting her. I needed to get with the program, so I hooked my fingers in her tiny little underwear and pulled them down her legs. She shivered in response and now that she was finally fully naked and trapped under me there was a hint of trepidation in her mossy gaze.
“You’re beautiful.” I had said it to many others before her, but I think this was the first time I meant it.
She put her hands on either side of my head and I realized my new hairdo wasn’t exactly an easy one to work with where sex was involved. There was nothing up there for her to hold on to, nothing up there for her to run her fingers through—it was all spiked up and manhandled into intimidating spikes—not that she seemed to care. She scraped her fingernails across my scalp and gave me a lopsided grin. I couldn’t tell if the booze was wearing off or she was finally starting to realize we were naked in bed and about to cross a definite boundary, but a hint of the Shaw I was used to dealing with was starting to surface.
“So are you. You shouldn’t be, but you always have been. I remember the first time I saw you I couldn’t believe you were Remy’s twin. He was so handsome, always so put together, but you … God, Rule, you are and were just perfect.”
The fact that she brought Remy’s name up while her hand was wrapped around my dick should have been like ice water on the moment. It wasn’t. I kissed her below her ear and let my teeth nick her neck and she made a noise that did something to the center of my chest. She hooked a leg up over my hip so that all her heat was pressed up against my hardness. I blinked for a second because I felt like I was forgetting something. She was wrapping her arms around my shoulders and panting as I brushed kisses across her puckered nipples. Just as I was about to let her pull me in, a shiver of apprehension slammed across my spine and I pushed off her. “Condom.” I’d been having sex since I was fourteen years old and it didn’t matter who the girl was or how drunk I was—I never forgot. The fact that my head was spun around by her and I was so lost in what we were doing that I almost put both of us at risk scared the shit out of me.
“I have one in my purse.”
I looked at her and blinked. “I have a box in the nightstand, Shaw. Come on, do you really want to do this? Think about it. You’re wasted. You’re probably going to regret it in the morning.”
She sat up and her cool two-toned hair fell forward to cover the top of her swollen breasts. She looked like every naughty dream I had ever had of her and I couldn’t believe I was trying to talk her out of doing this with me. Her eyes suddenly got glassy and I knew she was going to cry. She went to crawl past me off the bed but I trapped her in my arms and rolled her so that we were once again lined up.
“Don’t cry.”
“You never wanted me.”
I was stunned I just let my mouth fall open. “Uh … I’m pretty sure you can feel the proof that that’s not true. In fact, you just had your hot little hands all over it.”
She shook her head and her silky blond hair rubbed across my chest. “That’s not what I mean.”
“What do you mean?” She wiggled a little against me and reached an arm up for my nightstand drawer. If it had been anyone else I would have freaked out, but this was Shaw. Anything that was in that drawer wouldn’t surprise her or freak her out; including the loaded gun I kept in there. I heard the cellophane wrapper and felt her hands back below my waist. I wasn’t sure I remembered ever having a condom put on me or it ever feeling so good.
“Rule, it’s my birthday and my life is a freaking mess most of the time. Can you just for once do something nice for me, please?”
What red-blooded American male would turn down a dead-sexy, naked blonde who asked him to please do it to her? Not me, no way, no how, so I kissed her again, let my tongue slide against hers and lifted her leg up over my hip. I liked to think I knew what I was doing in this department—after all I had more practice than I cared to admit—but for some reason with her I felt like what I was doing was all new. She kissed me back and gasped softly as I started to slide in. She was tight and tiny, hot and wet, and I thought I was going to die if I didn’t get to get all the way in in the next second.
She whispered my name across my neck and arched her back. Her nails dug into my shoulders as I lifted her up a little bit and tried to push all the way in. I swore and she froze as there was something most definitely in the way, but my momentum was too great and I had her too keyed up to stop. She snapped her wide eyes to mine as her mouth made a little O of surprised pain as I glared down at her.
“What the fuck, Shaw?”
She gave her head a little shake and lifted her other leg up around my hip and moved against me in a way that made me utter every swear word I knew. “Don’t stop. Rule, please don’t stop.” She was breathy and it was too late for that to be an option anyway. She felt better than anything I had ever felt in my life and there was no way I was going to stop now, not unless I wanted to walk funny until I was thirty. I let the fingers of one hand tangle in her hair and propped my weight on the other so that I wasn’t crushing her and went about having the best sex of my life with a goddamn lying virgin.
She moved just the way I wanted her to, touched me in ways that would wake me up in the middle of the night remembering them. She kissed me like she had been created to do it exactly the way I liked and matched my rhythm the way only people who’ve had lots and lots of sex together normally managed to do. Every time she whispered my name or made a sexy sound of satisfaction and delight it made me feel ten feet tall. I hadn’t had sober sex in a long time and I hadn’t had sex with someone I knew for more than a few hours in a long time, either. I couldn’t believe the difference both those things made.
I wanted it to be good for her, wanted it to turn her inside-out like it was doing to me, and since it was her first time, I wanted to make sure that it was what she was going to have to compare every guy to after me.
As we moved together she arched her back and put her hands back on my head. “Oh my God, Rule.” She was close; I could feel the little tremors all along my cock. There was no way I was going to ruin this for her so I touched her in a way that was guaranteed to make her shatter and was rewarded with big eyes and a gasp of surrender. I was super relieved because I wasn’t going to last much longer. I buried my nose in her neck and followed her over the edge. By the time we were done my arms were shaking and I was breathing like I had run a marathon. I slid out of her and rolled to my side, all ready to have the regret and despair settle on me, but her eyes had drifted closed so I got up to go into my bathroom and clean up. I pulled on a pair of sweats and grabbed a washcloth for her. When I went back into the room she was curled up on her side with her cheek resting on her folded hands, which made her look all of sixteen years old. The steady rise and fall of her chest indicated that she was asleep, so I cleaned her up the best I could without waking her and settled on the bed next to her. I crossed my arms under my head and stared up at the ceiling.
What the hell had I done? And what in the hell had Remy been doing with her for all those years if he hadn’t been sleeping with her? They had always claimed they were just friends, but no one had believed them. The love they had for each other, the protectiveness, the camaraderie they shared had often made me jealous, and now I didn’t know what the hell to think. Shaw had been a girl who fell into the “girls I can’t or won’t have sex with” category for most of my life, but now I had blown that all to smithereens and I didn’t know what to do about it. She wasn’t just some chick I could never call again, that I could shove out the door the next morning. Add in the fact that it was probably the most intense, best sex of my life, and I felt like I was losing control. I shouldn’t feel that way about Shaw; she shouldn’t be the one to rock my world like it had never been rocked before. Frankly, it weirded me out that she was better and more turned on by my ink and piercings than the majority of girls I brought home. Now I had