While My Sister Sleeps. Barbara Delinsky
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‘She collapsed on the road,’ Molly said, taking her hand.
‘Collapsed? From heat? Dehydration?’
Molly didn’t answer, just hurried her down the hall. Kathryn’s fear grew with each step. Other runners collapsed, but not Robin. Physical stamina was in her genes.
She caught her breath at the cubicle door. Chris was there, too. But that couldn’t be Robin, lying senseless and limp, hooked to machines–machines that were keeping her alive, the doctor said after explaining what had happened.
Kathryn was beside herself. The explanations made no sense. Nor did the X-rays. Her daughter’s hand, which she clutched, was inert as only a sleeping person’s hand would be.
But she didn’t wake up when the doctor called her name or pinched her ear, and even Kathryn could see that her pupils didn’t dilate in response to light. Kathryn figured the person doing the prodding wasn’t doing it right, but she had no better luck when she tried it all herself–not when she pleaded with Robin to open her eyes, not when she begged her to squeeze her hand.
The doctor kept talking. Kathryn no longer took in each word, but the gist got through with devastating effect. She didn’t realize she was crying until Charlie handed her a tissue.
When Robin’s face blurred, she saw her own–the same dark hair, same brown eyes, same intensity. Two peas in a pod, they had neither the fair features, nor the laid-back approach to life of the others in the family.
Kathryn refocused. Charlie seemed desolate, Chris stupefied, and Molly was stuck to the wall. Silence from all three? Was that it? If no one else questioned the status quo, it was up to her–but hadn’t it always been that way when it came to Robin?
Defiant, she faced the doctor. ‘Brain damage isn’t an option. You don’t know my daughter. She’s resilient. She comes back from injuries. If this is a coma, she’ll wake up. She’s been a fighter since birth–since conception.’ She held Robin’s hand tightly. They were in this together. ‘What comes next?’
‘Once she’s stabilized, we move her upstairs.’
‘What’s her condition now? Wouldn’t you call it stable?’
‘I’d call it critical.’
Kathryn couldn’t handle that word. ‘What’s in her IV?’
‘Fluids, plus meds to stabilize her blood pressure and regulate the rhythm of her heart. It was erratic when she first arrived.’
‘Maybe she needs a pacemaker.’
‘Right now, the meds are working, and besides, she wouldn’t be able to handle surgery.’
‘If the choice is between surgery and death-’
‘It isn’t. No one’s letting her die, Mrs Snow. We can keep her going.’
‘But why do you say her brain is damaged?’ Kathryn challenged. ‘Only because she doesn’t respond? If she’s been traumatized by a heart attack, wouldn’t that explain the lack of response? How do you test for brain damage?’
‘We’ll do an MRI in the morning. Right now, we don’t want to move her.’
‘If there’s damage, can it be repaired?’
‘No. We can only prevent further loss.’
Feeling thwarted, Kathryn turned on her husband. ‘Is this all they can do? We can live with a heart condition, but not brain damage. I want a second opinion. And where are the specialists? This is only the ER, for God’s sake. These doctors may be trained to handle trauma, but if Robin has been here for three hours and hasn’t been seen by a cardiologist, we need to have her moved.’
She saw Molly shoot a troubled look at Charlie, but Charlie didn’t say anything, and Lord knew Chris wouldn’t. Frightened and alone, Kathryn turned back to the doctor. ‘I can’t sit and wait. I want to be proactive.’
‘Sometimes that isn’t possible,’ he replied. ‘What’s crucial right now is getting her up to the ICU. The doctor there will call in specialists. This is all standard protocol.’
‘Standard protocol isn’t good enough,’ Kathryn insisted, desperate that he understand. ‘There is nothing standard about Robin. Do you know what she does with her life?’
The eyes behind the glasses didn’t blink. ‘Yes, I do. It’s hard not to know when you live around here. Her name is in the local papers so often.’
‘Not only the local papers. That’s why she has to recover from this. She works all over the country with budding track stars. We’re talking teenage girls. They can’t see this. They can’t begin to think that the reward for training hard and aiming high is…is this. Okay, you may not have had a case like this before, but if that’s so, just say it and we’ll have her transferred.’
She searched family faces for agreement, but Charlie seemed stricken, Chris was frozen, and Molly simply looked pleadingly from her father to her brother and back.
Useless. All three.
So Kathryn told the doctor, ‘This isn’t a personal indictment. I’m just wondering whether doctors in Boston or New York would have more experience with injuries like these.’
Molly touched her elbow then. Kathryn looked at her youngest in time to hear her murmur, ‘She needs to be in intensive care.’
‘Correct. I just don’t know where.’
‘Here. Let her stay here. She’s alive, Mom. They got her heart going, and it’s still beating. They’re doing all they can.’
Kathryn arched a brow. ‘Do you know that for fact? Where were you, Molly? If you’d been with her, this wouldn’t have happened.’
Molly paled, but she didn’t retreat. ‘I couldn’t have prevented a heart attack.’
‘You could have gotten her help sooner. You have issues, Molly. You’ve always had issues with Robin.’
‘But look,’ the girl urged, glancing at the medical personnel hovering at the door. ‘They’re waiting to take her upstairs, and we’re slowing them down. Once she’s there, we can talk about specialists, even about moving her; but right now, shouldn’t we be giving her every possible chance?’
Molly followed the others to the ICU and watched the team get Robin settled. At one point she counted five doctors and three nurses in the room, as frightening as it was reassuring. Monitors were adjusted and vital signs checked, while the respirator breathed in and out. Every minute or two someone spoke loudly to Robin, but she didn’t respond.
Kathryn left the bedside only when a doctor or nurse needed access. The rest of the time, she held Robin’s hand, stroked her face, urged her to blink or moan.
As Molly watched from the wall, she was haunted by the knowledge that her mother was right. If Robin had started breathing sooner, there would be no brain damage. If Molly had been with her, Robin would have started breathing sooner.
But she wasn’t the only one who had let Robin down. She couldn’t blame her mother for being frantic back in the ER, but where was her father? He was supposed to be the calm one. What had he been thinking letting Kathryn go on like that? Even Chris could have spoken up.
They didn’t have the guts, Molly decided, and then modified the thought. They knew better.
You have issues. You’ve always had issues with Robin. She knew her mother was upset, but Molly was feeling guilty enough to be flayed by the words. As the minutes passed and the machines beeped, she remembered occasionally deleting a phone message, buying the wrong energy bar, misplacing a favorite running hat. Each offense could be balanced with something good Molly had done, but the good was lost in the guilt.
Chris left at midnight,