CHAPTER FOUR

      My grandfather owned an old fashioned hardware store, and it ticked him off to no end that I enjoyed playing there as a little girl. I mean, he loved me to death and I couldn't get enough of the guy. But to Pops, hardware was a man's game, and no place for a six year old girl who should otherwise be occupied with Barbie dolls or skipping rope. To me the place was a giant metal toy store, where I could do cool stuff with magnets and leave countless colorful chalk marks on the walls using that plumb line thing. (In case you hadn't guessed by now, I'm one of those kids who colored outside the lines in grade school.)

      Pops had a display in the front window in a futile attempt to scare the women away by offending them. When women's lib hit the country and skirts first appeared in his store, he took action by placing a small, bright red toolbox in the front window with a sign reading, "Woman's toolbox. Fully stocked. $19.95." Inside were two things: a can of WD-40 and a roll of duct tape. When women asked about it, he replied in this manner: "If it moves and shouldn't, duct tape. If it should move but doesn't, WD-40. If a woman has to deal with anything else, she needs to call a man."

      Reporters all have virtual toolboxes. Writing ability, poise, the ability to wing it, a built-in bullshit detector and, most important in New York City, street smarts. The one tool they should give you in journalism class but don't is this thing called negotiating skills.

      Because when you're dealing with broadcasting management, you've just entered the world's sleaziest car dealership and you're about to sit down with a man in a polyester suit. "So, what's it gonna take to put you behind the wheel of this morning show, little lady?"

      We even have a newsroom acronym that describes the process. BOHICA.

       Bend over, here it comes again.

      As I headed to Gavin's office on Monday morning, I was armed with very little in the way of bargaining power. Because he has those world class carrots of The Chair and The Campaign to dangle. (I've decided the latter now deserves capital letters, like The Morning Show.) And there are a dozen other qualified women who would offer to have his children for the chance. (By the way, upper news management is predominantly filled by poster children for male-pattern ugliness who would otherwise have no shot at even being in the same zip code as a woman who looks like Noelle Larson. Power is the great equalizer in this business.)

      Scott has filled me in on the specifics of Noelle's offer, complete with all the little perks they were willing to throw in. Some are standard for morning show anchors, like a limo to take you to the studio. They don't want their bleary-eyed stars scraping windshields, shoveling the driveway or getting behind the wheel half-asleep at two in the morning. Others are not, like their offer to insure Noelle's legs for one million dollars. (Should have thrown in a fifty dollar policy rider for her brain.)

      Gavin's hot blonde secretary smiled and waved me into his massive corner office featuring floor-to-ceiling windows that offered a great view of Central Park. I had arrived at five minutes till nine. He got up from behind his antique oak desk which was cluttered with papers and extended his hand. "You're early. I like that."

      I shook his hand. "I figured if I was late you'd give the job to someone else."

      He smiled and gestured to one of the two chairs opposite his desk. "Your agent on the way?"

      "Don't have one." Big smile from Gavin. Management hates dealing with agents.

      "I'm surprised, but I'm not gonna complain. However, I am rather curious as to why you don't employ one for something like this."

      I was glad I hadn't as I looked around the office. Half a dozen Emmy Awards sat on the wooden credenza behind his desk, while the bookshelf cubicles were filled with more award statues I didn't recognize. The walls were covered with photos featuring Gavin with various celebrities. There was a class system in television, and I wasn't in the top one yet. He was.

      "Look, I could bring some shark in here to play hardball and maybe get another ten percent out of you, and then I'd have to turn around and give him ten percent of the gross instead of the net. Do the math. And I don't want to get off on the wrong foot. Besides, I'm old fashioned and think we're adult enough to make a deal in a civilized fashion without any lawyers in the room."

      "Well, that's refreshing."

      "I said no lawyers in the room. That doesn't mean I won't have mine look over the contract. Which I'm sure is fine."

      "Fair enough. And since we're putting our cards on the table, I'll be honest. We offered the job to Noelle and she turned it down. But you were a close second anyway."

      "I'm sure I'm a helluva lot cheaper."

      He tried to hold back a smile and was unsuccessful. "This is still a helluva lot of money we're talking about." He opened a red folder, took out a single sheet of paper and slid it toward me. "This is the basic offer. I'll give you a more detailed contract to take home and review with your attorney, but the broad strokes are covered here so you don't have to wade through the legalese."

      I grabbed the sheet of paper and tried my best not to let my eyes bug out, but when the word "million" ends up next to "salary" it's hard to keep a poker face.

      It wasn't Katrina's money, or Noelle's. But for a girl who grew up in a hardware store, it was enough to buy enough duct tape to circle the planet a few times and hose down the entire globe with WD-40. The salary was more money that I could possibly spend, even after taxes. Three year contract, five million per. A list of wonderful perks. "That's extremely generous," I said. For someone who's never anchored or done a morning show, I thought, but didn't say.

      "We want you to be comfortable."

      "Hell, Gavin, I could eat lobster every day on this. Even after my income tax funds jobs for ten government slugs."

      "So, thoughts?"

      "Well, this looks fine, but I do have two small requests."

      He rolled his eyes. "Oh geez … "

      "No, no, these aren't going to cost you anything. One has to do with a staff writer at my affiliate. George Winson."

      "Don't think I've ever met him."

      "We'll, you're heard his words for years if you've watched our newscast. Anyway, he's sixty-two with a kid in grad school and the current News Director is trying to force him to quit so he can hire someone younger and cheaper. He's got three years till retirement and I'd love to bring him along."

      "I thought this wasn't going to cost me anything."

      "It's not. I'd like you to subtract his salary from mine. Basically, I wanna pay for him. He's a good friend and I'll need a fabulous writer for this gig anyway. Personally I love to write but I can't do it at three in the morning."

      "Sounds very doable. Katrina's writer just quit anyway. She didn't like Scott."

      "Great. Pay him a hundred grand, and make my salary four-point-nine million."

      "That's incredibly generous of you, Veronica. I'd heard you were great to work with but I've never heard of something like this."

      "When people are good to me, I have their backs."

      "Very nice. What's the second thing?"

      "My