Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 3. Derek Landy

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Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 3 - Derek Landy


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couldn’t have, even if I’d have wanted to. Just worked it out a few minutes ago. Simple really. It was right in front of us.”

      “We can talk about this later,” Ghastly said. “We have to go.”

      “Will there be fighting?”

      “I hope not.”

      “I’m in the mood for some fighting.”

      “If there is,” Stephanie said, handing him his gun, “here’s something you can use.”

      “Ah, bless. I’ve missed her. Do you have bullets?”

      “Uh, no.”

      Skulduggery paused. “Excellent,” he said, and tucked the gun away.

      “Let’s go,” Ghastly said and stepped out of the door.

      Stephanie and Skulduggery followed. They hurried down the corridor and turned a corner. A group of Hollow Men froze in mid-step and regarded them vacantly. Time stood still.

      “Yes,” Skulduggery said. “This is a fabulous rescue indeed.”

      The Hollow Men came at them, and Skulduggery and Ghastly went into action. Skulduggery worked with elbows and knees, wristlocks and armlocks. Ghastly deftly wove in and around attacks, firing out punches at whoever got close.

      Beyond the silent Hollow Men, Stephanie saw Tanith sprinting forward, and then she ran up the wall and across the ceiling and continued running, upside down. Stephanie stared. She hadn’t known Tanith could do that.

      From the ceiling, Tanith joined the attack, swinging the sword and slicing through the tops of heads. Within a matter of moments, the Hollow Men were reduced to tatters and a foul smell.

      Tanith jumped down, flipping to land on her feet. “There are more coming,” she said, then added helpfully; “We should probably leave.”

      They reached the stairs without encountering any more opposition, but as they were running for the exit, two massive doors were kicked open ahead and the Hollow Men reinforcements arrived.

      Skulduggery and Ghastly stepped up, clicking their fingers and hurling fireballs at the ground. Stephanie watched their hands move, manipulating the flames until there was a wall of fire keeping the Hollow Men back.

      Tanith turned to Stephanie. “Coat.”

      “What?”

      Without giving an explanation, Tanith gripped Stephanie’s collar and pulled the coat off. She then ran for the window, covering her head with the coat, and jumped. She crashed through in an explosion of glass.

      “Oh,” Stephanie murmured.

      She ran over, climbing through the window as Tanith got to her feet.

      “Thanks,” Tanith said, handing her back the coat.

      “Watch out!” Ghastly shouted.

      Stephanie dodged to one side as Ghastly and Skulduggery dived through the window – Ghastly lower down, Skulduggery above him – like two lunatic acrobats. They hit the grass and rolled, coming up at the same time.

      “Flee,” Skulduggery said.

      As they ran for the trees, Stephanie saw one of the Cleavers who had accompanied them. Judging by the tattered paper strewn around him, the Cleavers had obviously put up an amazing fight, but the sheer numbers of Hollow Men had proven too much. He lay dead on the grass. She saw no sign of the other one.

      And then they were in the trees and not slowing down, and Hollow Men were crashing through the undergrowth after them.

      Ghastly reached the wall first, swept his hands beneath him and let the air lift him over the wall.

      Tanith just kept running. Right before she was about to smack straight into it she gave a little jump and then she was running up the wall.

      Before Stephanie could ask Skulduggery for a boost his arm wrapped around her waist and she found herself rushing upwards, the wind in her ears, and the top of the wall passing beneath her feet. They landed on the other side with such ease and gentleness that Stephanie almost laughed despite herself.

      They got in the van and Ghastly turned the key and pulled out on to the road, and they left the castle behind them.

       18

      ON THE ROOF, AT NIGHT

      aughter drifted in the distance and Skulduggery looked towards it. They were standing on the roof of Ghastly’s shop. Dublin City twinkled as it got ready for sleep. Stephanie could see over rooftops, over streets, down lanes. She could see the cars passing, and here and there people walking. When he turned back, he said, “So, Valkyrie Cain, eh?”

      “You don’t think it sounds silly, do you?”

      “On the contrary, I think it sounds perfect. Valkyrie. Warrior women who guide the souls of the dead off the battlefield. A tad morbid, but then, who am I to judge? I’m technically dead.”

      Stephanie looked at him and took a moment before speaking again. “So was it bad? The torture?”

      “It wasn’t fun,” he said. “I think after the first few hours he knew I had no idea where the key was. After that, he was torturing me purely for the sake of torturing me. Did I thank you for coming to my rescue, by the way?”

      “Don’t worry about it.”

      “Nonsense. Thank you.”

      She smiled. “You’re welcome.”

      “Your friend Tanith seemed a bit quiet on the trip home.”

      “I think she regrets using the Cleavers as a diversion.”

      “I would have made the same decision,” Skulduggery said. “The Cleavers have a job to do – let them do it.”

      “That’s what she said.”

      “Ah, but it’s one thing to understand that and quite another to accept it. Until that happens, she’s going to have one or two nightmares about it. But she’s a warrior. She’ll make it.”

      “She’s a good fighter.”

      “Indeed she is.”

      “If I started training now, would I be able to fight like her when I’m her age?”

      “I don’t see why not. Sixty years of good solid training is enough to turn anyone into a tidy little scrapper.”

      “What?”

      “What what?”

      “Sixty years? How old is she?”

      “I’d say seventy if she’s a day.”

      Stephanie stared. “Right,” she said firmly, “it’s time for you to tell me how you people live so long.”

      “Diet and exercise.”

      “Skulduggery—”

      “Clean healthy living.”

      “I swear…”

      “Magic then.”

      She looked at him. “Do all sorcerers live forever?”

      “Not forever, no. Not even close to forever. We do age, it’s just we do it slower then the rest of humanity. The regular use of a certain amount of magic rejuvenates the body, keeps it young.”

      “So if I started learning magic now, I’d stay twelve?”

      “It


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