Summer in Manhattan. Katherine Garbera
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and it’s just going to get worse.”
He put his hand on the back of her neck and rubbed in a soft circular motion. “Too late. I’m not going to let you keep backing away. We’ve already decided to give this a try.”
“We did?” she asked. She didn’t think they’d done that but she wasn’t ready to walk away from him yet.
“And you don’t strike me as someone who backs down. I mean, I saw you cheering on your team in enemy country.”
She smiled, even though she didn’t want to. And then wondered why she didn’t want to. Did she have to punish herself because she’d made a mistake with this man? Was that why she was trying so hard to find any reason not to be with him.
She leaned forward, putting her forehead on his chest and her arms around his waist. She could tell she startled him because his hand dropped to his side and then he wrapped his arms around her.
She held him and didn’t say anything. Just took comfort from this man who she really didn’t know what to do with. And right now, as crappy as she was feeling, she didn’t want to have to figure it out or worry about the future. She just needed…Hoop.
She lifted her head, staring up into those brilliant blue eyes of his and he put his hands on her head, tucked the long strand of her bangs back behind her ear.
He tangled their fingers together and turned so they were facing the exit. “Let’s go.”
“Go where?”
“Somewhere we can be alone,” he said.
She wanted to be the woman she saw when he looked at her. Someone who was strong. Strong enough to make the right choices and to own up to the world if she didn’t.
They’d caught a cab to Red Roosters in Harlem because Cici was hungry and somehow taking her back to his place had bad idea written all over it. Kissing her had changed something inside of him. Watching her run away to be sick had been a pretty clear reminder of her circumstances.
She needed a friend and he’d offered.
It wasn’t one he’d made lightly though. His hormones were doing their damnedest to convince him that friends with benefits was a good idea, but he knew she needed just a friend. She was on her own with the baby. And he knew how fragile that could be. He’d seen it as an adult and lived through it as a child.
And she had seemed to lose some of her glow after she’d gotten sick. Who could blame her? So, he sat in a corner booth across from her and asked her about baseball.
“You are a crazy massive fan of baseball,” he said, taking a sip of his sweet tea. He needed something to cool him down but it wasn’t the heat in the city that had him on fire. It was Cici.
Her hair kept curling around her face and she tucked the same strand behind her ear repeatedly. That strand. It had been soft and silky to the touch. Just like her lips. He wanted to kiss her again but he was being cool. She’d worn contacts today and he noticed how pretty her eyes were.
But he was honoring her desire for them to be friends. Plus, he knew she needed more from him than just full on guy hormones. She needed comfort and to feel normal. He’d not been around pregnant women much. One of his sisters at the Fillions’ foster home had a baby last year but she lived in Florida now with her husband so he hadn’t seen her while she’d been expecting.
Just from watching Cici, he noticed how much it drained her. She’d been pale when she’d come out of the bathroom and shaken. The way she’d hugged him…she needed him.
No one had ever really needed him. He volunteered, of course, and he knew the kids he was a big brother to really appreciated it, but he had never felt as needed with them as he had with Cici this afternoon. This had felt more personal.
“I am a pretty intense fan when it comes to the Red Sox,” she admitted. “One year I went to spring training.”
“Just one year?” he asked with a wink. “How can you call yourself a massive fan?”
“Alright smarty, how many spring training games have you been to?” she asked.
“One. And that was just because my sister had a new baby and we all went to Florida,” he explained.
“Sister? I thought you were adopted. Did your parents…what happened with your parents?” she asked, reaching onto his plate and stealing a fry.
“Lisa is my sister but we aren’t biological siblings. She and I grew up in the same home…the Fillions. Did I tell you about them?”
“No. What happened to your folks?” she asked. “If I’m being too nosey just tell me to mind my own business. I think it’s a side effect of hanging out with Iona all the time.”
He rubbed his hand over his chest. His real parents. People always wanted to know about them. And frankly, he wanted to as well. “I have no idea. Near as anyone can figure, my mom was a teenager who gave birth…” he shrugged, “somewhere…and then dropped me off at the hospital and kept on trucking. Never gave me a name or anything.”
She reached across the table and took his hand in hers. She laced their fingers together and she squeezed gently. “I’m sorry. I never knew my dad either, so I can sort of understand not knowing.”
“It’s more than that,” he admitted. But they were on a date and he didn’t want to get into how he’d felt unworthy for so many years. He was better now; he knew that the problem was hers and not anything to do with him. But there were times when he wished he could meet her and show her what she’d walked away from.
“I can’t even begin to imagine,” she said. “How did you get your name?”
“The center she dropped me off at was on Hooper Street,” he said. “And one of the nurses thought I looked like a Jason. They had to fill in the paperwork. When I was a cop I went to investigate and found out about all the legalities involved. It’s how I decided to switch to being a lawyer.”
He took another sip of his sweet tea but it tasted too cloying now and he set it aside. Talking about his past always left him feeling…well, odd. That was the only word for it.
“I’ve reached out to one of my coworkers about your case and if you have time next week, I’d love for you to stop by the office and meet with her. Then you can get the paperwork started to send them to your…I don’t know what to call him.”
Cici blushed. “Baby daddy? Sperm donor?”
“No. That’s not it,” he said. “Mr. Maguire.”
“Once he signs the papers then you’ll be protected and to be honest, he will be too. That way you can’t go back to him and demand anything from him.”
“I would never do that,” Cici said.
“I know. But it will give him peace of mind and make him more amenable to signing the papers,” Hoop said. He’d handled a lot of cases like hers and knew that having a binding contract wasn’t always enough but it gave each party some peace of mind. He wanted to make sure that Cici was protected.
“Good. I just want that done,” she said. “I think once this is settled, well I can really start to figure out things for the baby.”
“Like what?” he asked. He didn’t know what a child would need or what a single mom would. Seeing Cici on her own made him wonder if his own mother had been like this. Did she have a friend to talk to? He’d never know. He knew that but it stirred questions all the same.
“Like the nursery colors and theme…and then I have to find a preschool and get on the waiting list,” she said.
“You haven’t even given birth yet,” he said, but he knew from one of his co-workers who was struggling to get their kids into the right school how hard it was.
“You have no idea about all the things that I have to decide,” she