Desert Rogues Part 2. Susan Mallery
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look at her. “My father had two great loves in his life. Zara’s mother, and Reyhan and Jefri’s mother. His first arranged marriage produced my older brother, Murat, and his second produced me. There was no love lost in either case. Murat’s mother died in childbirth, and my mother killed herself rather than be with him. Or me.”
All the blood rushed from Cleo’s head, leaving her feeling as if the room had begun to spin. Her heartbeat sounded loud in the silence. She struggled to find words.
“What happened?”
“She took pills. I was still very young and did not realize the significance of what she had done for some time. It does not matter.”
But of course it mattered. Cleo knew it mattered very much, although she couldn’t say exactly how.
“So you were left alone?”
He shrugged. “My father was king. He had affairs of state. There were nannies for a time, then I was sent off to school when I was seven.”
Cleo might not have a drop of royal blood in her veins, but she knew what it was like to grow up lonely. She couldn’t fix Sadik’s past, but she could promise him that history would not repeat itself.
“When I was very young, I swore that no matter what, I would never abandon my child the way I’d been abandoned,” she told him. “No matter what, Sadik, I will be there for our child.”
“As will I.”
Sadik stared into Cleo’s beautiful face and saw the conviction blazing in her eyes. At that moment, as they shared their vows, he felt closer to her than he had ever felt to anyone. He had never shared the horrors of his past before. His brothers knew, of course, but they did not speak of such things. He had never talked of it with his father. Yet the information was all there, in the back of his mind. The knowledge that his mother could not have been bothered to stay alive to be with him for the first few years of his life.
He told himself he was a grown man and such events from his past had no meaning. Most of the time he believed the words.
He shifted on the sofa and held out his arms. Cleo came to him instantly. She snuggled close, her growing belly pressing into his side. He accepted her comfort, enjoying the heat of her body and the way her small hands clung to him.
Her nearness made the ghosts of the past fade as his body responded to her curves and her fragrance. Desire filled the empty places inside of him. But he did not reach for her. Not yet. Instead he waited, wanting her to be the one to reach for him.
Over the past few weeks he had seen a change in Cleo. She no longer demanded that he love her. The word never passed her lips. He had seen her trying to make their marriage a success and he did his best to improve things between them. Yet despite her smiles and easy laughter, he sensed there was something missing. When he touched her in bed, she was always willing, yet she never touched him first.
He did not mind seducing her each time. Seducing Cleo was the stuff of dreams. But he knew there was still a wall between them. Sometimes he thought even she did not realize there was something wrong. Because he knew her so well—the sound of her breathing, the beat of her heart—he could not likewise be fooled.
She was like a boat cut adrift on a slow-moving river. At first she seemed to simply hang there, but eventually she would slip away. He wanted to reach out and grasp the rope, pulling her in. He knew the problem and he knew the solution. She wanted him to love her. Love.
Why did she seek the one thing he could not provide?
And then, because he could not resist her any longer, he reached for her. She responded instantly, kissing him with a fervor that took his breath away. As he pulled her into his arms and carried her into their bedroom, he told himself that the boat hadn’t drifted out so very far that day. Perhaps the tide would turn and she would come to rest in a place she would never want to leave.
“Our holiday celebrations are unique,” King Hassan said as he and Cleo strolled through his garden. “We celebrate many faiths in our country, and each is given its due. You will find much of the old city decorated as if for a large party.”
He motioned to a bench in the shade of several palms. It was a frequent stopping place for them on their twice-weekly walks.
Cleo settled on the stone bench and rested her hand on her belly. Based on her growing girth, she found it difficult to believe she still had over two months left.
“As long as I can have a Christmas tree for the suite,” she said, smiling at her father-in-law. “I love the smell of pine.”
“Something we do not have here in our world.” He nodded. “I have already arranged for the palace to be a winter wonderland, specifically for your pleasure.”
His kindness made her feel all weepy inside. “You’re spoiling me.”
“I enjoy the process. Besides, you are the honored mother of my firstborn grandson.”
Cleo had thought that Hassan’s attention to her might drop off once he found out that Sabrina was pregnant, but so far that had not happened. Perhaps he actually liked her for herself. Since returning to Bahania, she’d spent much time with the king. While he still had the power to make her incredibly nervous, she enjoyed his company and their times together.
“Tell me of your studies,” he said as he leaned down to pet one of the palace cats that strolled along the path.
Cleo shifted to get comfortable. “They’re going really well. I figure that realistically I won’t actually be taking classes at the university until next fall. When the baby comes, I want to be free to get used to being a mother. But until then, I’m working hard. I actually have three tutors now.”
Hassan raised his eyebrows. “How many subjects are you…” He frowned. “What is the phrase?”
“Brushing up on.”
“Ah. That is it.”
Cleo shrugged, feeling vaguely guilty. “Well, it’s gotten a little more complicated than that. Alice was my first tutor. She helps me with my general knowledge and study habits. I’m learning how to read a textbook and understand the central points and how to take notes. She started talking to me about Bahanian history. I found it really interesting, but she doesn’t consider herself an expert, so one day a week I see Luja. She’s lived in the old part of the city all her life. She’s got to be close to a hundred. Anyway, she knows practically everything about Bahania, so we talk about history and politics.”
Hassan touched her hand. “I am most proud of you, child.”
Cleo ducked her head. “Yeah, well, I’m doing it because it’s interesting.”
“Learning about your new homeland is most wise. And who is your third tutor?”
“That’s the funny part. Alice was going over some basic math stuff with me and I found I really liked it.” Cleo shook her head, still amazed by what she was discovering about herself. “The thing is, I’m also really good at it. So she’s brought in a math tutor. Shereen is taking me through basic algebra and next up is geometry. I can’t wait.”
“So Zara isn’t the only smart one in your family.”
“I guess not.” Hard to believe but true, she thought happily. All those years ago she’d never given school a chance. How would her life have been different if she’d found even one thing to be good at? Maybe she wouldn’t have made so many stupid choices in her personal life.
“And my grandson’s room is ready for his arrival?”
Cleo didn’t even bother correcting Hassan’s assumption about the baby’s gender. She’d grown tired of fighting that particular battle. She just hoped she was focused enough to enjoy the moment should her baby turn out to be a girl.
“We’re nearly done,” she said, then laughed. “Technically the room is completely empty,