The Way of Nowhere: Eight Questions to Release Our Creative Potential. Nick Udall
Читать онлайн книгу.
creative life force, we are happy, confident and seemingly tireless, as we access an infinite source of energy. This optimism and confidence then affects others. They in turn become more confident and more willing to see what we can create together, as well as more enthusiastic about the adventure we are on and the difference we can make.
All of this may sound easy, but in reality it is tremendously difficult. Patterns of thought, and the emotions they engender, have a very powerful influence over us. For much of the time our positive emotions are in conflict with irritation, disillusionment, jealousy – any of the large number of negative emotional reactions that sap our energy and compromise our relationships with others.
Trusting life's growth therefore requires us to seek congruence, authenticity and discipline (see page 98) in the way we walk in the world. As self-leaders, we need to be continuously on guard for the emotions that threaten our connection to our creative life force and intervene before they take hold. If we are not quick and skilful, these emotions become the lens through which we see the world and we can spend years looking at life from a distorted perspective. The allied energy in the South asks us to accept only moments like this and to have the courage and discipline to move on, trusting in life's growth.
Elegant response
Once we engage with the inner battle for emotional mastery (instead of being its unwitting victim), we can begin to see how the same struggle is being played out in the people around us. Then we can take a third position, a meta-position – a position that does not collude with the emotion – ‘Yes, I think that too’ –or react to it – ‘What do you mean by that?’ – but simply allows us to observe it with compassion.
In one-to-one relationships, we are interested in how this emotional position affects the adventure that we are on. It can open a space between the thinker and the thought and so enable choice. It can transform our unthinking reactions into elegant responses.
In groups, it can also make us simultaneously aware of the content of our conversations and the emotional quality of our engagement. When we are in the process but not of it in this way, we have greater ability to defuse conflict or collusion.2
Of course none of this is a linear process. Our inner and outer worlds are in dynamic relationship with one another. As soon as an inner pattern has surfaced, a new energy is released and the nature of the adventure of life deepens and expands in the outer world, transforming inspiration into innovation.
distortion: fear
over-dramatic? warriors know how to move empty yet direct
Over-dramatic?
We have already hinted at the distorted energy in this direction. It is the archetypal distortion, fear, which diminishes our trust in life.
It is easy to lose awareness of the relationship between out there and in here. When we perceive what is going on out there through our lenses of memory, thought and emotion, our emotional reaction to a situation becomes our dominant reality. Then leadership of our emotional power is lost and we become its victim. So a setback can become life-threatening, a look a huge personal slight, a small piece of good fortune a life-changing moment. Everything is either the worst thing that has ever happened or the best. We become afraid that each event might threaten our survival and believe our only chance is to react to each challenge as powerfully as we can.
This fear exacts a high price. What happens and how we feel about it begin to fill our consciousness to the extent that there is little time or space left for anything else. The moment-by-moment miracle of life is lost to us as we miss the sunrise, or the smile of our child, because of our obsession with what someone said or did. We begin to cut ourselves off from our creative life force. We lose the natural joy and confidence that come from letting go a little and trusting life to take some of the strain. We stop learning about ourselves because we cannot be honest enough to face up to our own authorship of the situation. We end up looking at life through eyes of fear and reinterpret events to provide evidence that feeds it.
The compulsive nature of this emotional rollercoaster is stressful and tiring. Imagine being strapped into a fairground ride for days, weeks, months or years.
This over-reactive mind often demands the company of others so it can gossip and explain who is to blame. The listener in turn pays a high price for choosing to hear this pessimism and negativity. At worst, the co-creative space between the two people disappears and each simply waits their turn to moan.
Over-dramatizing the ups and downs of life can be like a virulently infectious disease that can sweep through any family, group, team, community or organization. The challenge is to always be on guard for this powerful distortion by looking first into ourselves and then, and only then, at those around us.3
Our positive emotions – trust, hope, love – can fuel our journey into the unknown. The negative emotions – fear, distrust, jealousy and pessimism – will undermine us and keep us imprisoned in the known.
opposite: self-leadership
over-dramatic? warriors know how to move empty yet direct
Warriors know how to move
When faced with the unknown we may falter. There may be many times in our lives when we are undecided and the way forward is unclear. At these critical points we must take control of ourselves and not allow the patterns of the past to recreate our present, let alone our future. The power to move swiftly and decisively in the direction of the positive and away from the negative is the energy of the North.
This leadership intelligence summons the power of the heart-mind to break through uncertainty and to move forward positively. In this manifestation of our highest potential, we know exactly what to do and how to do it because we are clear about who we are and why we are here. We know what our gifts are and how we want to return them to the world. Like a wise fisherman, we have mended our emotional nets and the awesome power of our emotions is fuelling our action as opposed to fooling it.
So, at critical moments, we act with the power of a warrior, heart and mind as one, with a courage that comes from being in a flow that is infinitely bigger and stronger than the actions of the separate self.4
neighbours: presence & intentionality
over-dramatic? warriors know how to move empty yet direct
Empty yet direct
We can only attain this optimum level of performance through mastery of presence and mastery of intent.
To truly appreciate the power and beauty of the present moment we have to be able to empty and still ourselves. The breath is a great example of this. Even two or three conscious breaths open the space required to disconnect us from the yoke of over-reaction. This space enables us to discern whether our thoughts and feelings are a relevant response to the environment or a fear-