Moody Bitches: The Truth about the Drugs You’re Taking, the Sleep You’re Missing, the Sex You’re Not Having and What’s Really Making You Crazy.... Julie Holland
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Weekends at Bellevue
Thorsons
An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF
Published in the US by Penguin Press 2015
First published in the UK by Thorsons 2015
© Julie Holland 2015
A catalogue record of this book is available from the British Library
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Julie Holland asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work
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Source ISBN: 9780007554126
EBook Edition © MARCH 2015 ISBN: 9780007554133
Version: 2015-02-20
For Sara Starr Wolff, teacher, therapist, and gardener, who wanted what she had, and said what she meant. And for her son, Jeremy, whose shining love and acceptance allow me to blossom.
Contents
Part Two Mating, MILFs, Monogamy, and Menopause
Three This Is Your Brain on Love
Four Marriage and Its Discontents
Six Perimenopause: The Storm Before the Calm
Part Three The Moody Bitches Survival Guide
Seven Inflammation: The Key to Everything
Eight Food: A Drug We Can’t Resist
Ten A Sex Guide That Actually Works
Eleven Your Body: Love It or Leave It
Conclusion: Staying Sane in an Insane World
Appendix: Naming Names: A Guide to Selected Drugs
Women today are overworked and exhausted. We are anxious and frazzled, yet depressed and burned out. Our moods and libidos are at a rock-bottom low, our vital energies drained as we struggle to keep up with work, family, and hundreds of “friends” online. We blame ourselves for how bad we feel, thinking we should be able to handle it all. We dream of being perfect; we even try to make it look effortless, but we were never meant to be so static. We are designed by nature to be dynamic, cyclical, and, yes, moody. We are moody bitches, and that is a strength—not a weakness.
We evolved that way for good reasons; our hormonal oscillations are the basis for a sensitivity that allows us to be responsive to our environment. Our dynamism imparts flexibility and adaptability. Being fixed and rigid does not lend itself to survival. In nature, you adapt or you die. There is tremendous wisdom and peace available to us if we learn how our brains and bodies are supposed to work. Moodiness—being sensitive, caring deeply, and occasionally being acutely dissatisfied—is our natural source of power.
Yet we have been told just the opposite. From a young age, we are taught that moodiness, and all that comes with it, is a bad thing. We learn to apologize for our tears, to suppress our anger, and to fear being