Melt. Lisa Walker
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we were right on schedule for sleep at ten pm. The key to successful project management, as Adrian says, is to work backwards from the end point.
I’m enjoying reminiscing so much I don’t notice Adrian is late until six thirty-five. This isn’t like him at all. I take a sip of wine and peer out at the street. I hope he’s alright. Adrian is busy and important but he is always on time.
It’s another five minutes before he appears. He looks different. His hair, which is usually combed behind his ears, is sticking up from his head in a rock-star sort of way. He’s wearing a jacket I haven’t seen before. Black leather. Not his usual thing.
‘Hi, Summer.’ He takes off his jacket and hangs it over the back of his chair. I catch a whiff of an unfamiliar smell. A new deodorant? He seems distracted. He doesn’t kiss me on the cheek like he usually does. He must be nervous about proposing.
‘Your hair.’ I touch my own. ‘It’s sticking up.’
Adrian touches his hair. ‘Wax.’
‘Wax? You haven’t used that before.’ Obviously he’s making a special effort for our big night.
‘Makes a change.’
‘What’s that on your hand?’ I point to a bruise.
‘I fell. Rock-climbing. In the gym.’
‘Rock-climbing? Since when have you rock-climbed?’
‘I’m learning. It’s good for hand–eye coordination and strength.’ Renaldo brings Adrian his usual – Scotch and soda. He drains it. ‘Summer, I’ve got something to tell you.’
I place my left hand on the table to make it easier for him. He’s a little ahead of schedule, but that’s alright. I glance around the restaurant. I’m sure the other diners have an expectant air. They’ve definitely been briefed.
‘Summer, we’ve been together for a year,’ says Adrian.
I nod.
‘It’s been … good.’
I smooth my hair behind my ear with my right hand, leaving my left on the table.
‘As you are aware, there comes a time when you need to evaluate and decide what course of action to take next.’
‘Yes, I know, Adrian. Evaluation is the key to improved performance.’
‘Summer, this is a little hard for me to say …’ Poor Adrian looks bashful.
I decide to make things easier for him. ‘Yes.’
‘What?’
‘Yes! I’ll marry you.’
Chapter Five
Extreme Project Management
Project: Brain-wipe
Objective: Blot evening from memory
0.00–1.00: Aargh!
1.00–2.00: Aargh!
2.00–3.00: Aargh!
I fumble with the light switch. My heart is thudding from the usual dream, but the hum of my air-conditioner reassures me. Twenty-three degrees. I check my phone. It’s three am. I’ve barely slept. Yes! I’ll marry you. Why did I say that?
I pull the laptop towards me and open a new email.
To: Marley Lennon Wright
From: Summer Dawn Rain Wright
Subject: Use of the ‘f’ word
Adrian shook his head after I said I’d marry him. His cheeks were pink. ‘No, what I’m trying to say is … I think we need to take a break and consider our options.’
‘Take a break? Consider our options?’
Adrian waved his hand in a keep your voice down way. ‘You don’t seem fully committed to project planning … to the vision of Gantt.’
I glanced around the restaurant. Perhaps they hadn’t been briefed but they were paying attention now. Let them look, I didn’t care. ‘How am I not committed to the vision of Gantt?’
Adrian didn’t reply.
‘But Adrian, why? We’ve been together for one year. We have wonderful sex. (That wasn’t quite true, Marley, but I’d always let him think so.) We’re totally compatible. We both love the same things (if you discount running, Bikram yoga, art movies and wine-tasting). We have the same goals. Why?’
‘I’m sorry, Summer.’ Adrian fingered the bruise on his hand.
‘Is this because I didn’t make muesli?’
‘What? You told me you’d made muesli.’
‘I lied.’ I thought of the dust balls. ‘Did you look under my bed?’
‘No, why?’
‘Never mind. Why then? Why?’
‘You’re not achievement-focused, Summer. I should have realised when I met you. I thought I could change you, but I was wrong.’
‘No, you were right. I’ve come so far already. I’m a different person.’
Adrian sighed. ‘I didn’t want to have to say this, Summer, but … I’ve been seeing someone else.’
‘What? Who?’ I felt sick. Some other woman had lured Adrian away with her amazing project management skills. I hadn’t been trying hard enough.
Adrian fingered his hand. ‘It doesn’t matter who, but she’s … incredibly focused.’
‘Who? Tell me.’
A dreamy expression spread over Adrian’s face. ‘Cougar Gale.’
‘Cougar Gale?’ I glanced at the bruise. The rock-climbing – of course.
‘Cougar made me realise – life is not a dress rehearsal.’ He said this like it was the most insightful thing he’d ever heard.
I snorted. ‘Oh for fuck’s sake. We used to have a poster saying “life is not a dress rehearsal” pinned up in our outside toilet on the commune. It’s hardly profound.’
Adrian’s eyes widened. ‘You don’t normally swear, Summer.’
‘That goes to show how much you know about me, Adrian. The first word I ever said was “fuck”.’
That wasn’t true but, as you know, Marley, I did grow up around a lot of people who used the f-word as an all-purpose adjective.
Adrian blinked. ‘It’s not nice, for a woman to—’
‘Fuck, fuck, fuck. Ha. You want me to use the c-word? I can. I’ve done it before.’
Adrian cringed. He shook his head.
I salvaged what was left of my dignity and got to my feet. ‘I hope your spreadsheets get a virus.’ I walked away leaving him to pay the bill.
‘Don’t be like that, Summer,’ he called after me. ‘There’s no need to let this come between us. I still respect your abilities as a project manager.’
I didn’t dignify that with a reply.
Fuck Adrian. Tears prick my eyes. How could he do that? And to say I’m not committed to the vision of Gantt … I love project planning. It’s been a revelation. My phone lies on the bedroom table taunting me with its file of Adrian projects. I’d already started a wedding project plan. It would have been the best organised wedding ever. And he threw it all away. For what – rock-climbing with Cougar Gale? Wait until his rope breaks, he’ll be wishing life was a dress rehearsal then.
I grind my teeth. Adrian and Cougar