Oceanic. Aimee Nezhukumatathil

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Oceanic - Aimee Nezhukumatathil


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Upon Hearing the News You Buried Our Dog

      44  The Body

      45  The Pepper Kingdom

      46  One-Star Reviews of the Taj Mahal

      47  First Time on the Funicular

      48  One-Star Reviews of the Great Wall of China

      49  The Pepper King Returns

      50  Starfish and Coffee

      51  Naming the Heartbeats

      52  Chess

      53  My South

      54  Bengal Tiger

        About the Author

        Also by Aimee Nezhukumatathil

        Acknowledgments

        Copyright

        Special thanks

      OCEANIC

      Self-Portrait as Scallop

      When I Am Six

      CHICAGO

      My mother waters the tomato & pepper plants. I steal drinks from the penny-taste of the garden hose. It is my favorite drink. I am six & think to cross the street by myself from time to time, but never do. I am six, my sister is five, & we hide inside clothing racks at the store just to feel the black-sick fill our round bellies when we get lost, lost, lost from our mother. I am six & I am laughing with a mouthful of cashews. I think nuts is the funniest word I have ever heard. I am six & I break all my mother’s lipsticks & glue them together & put them back in her bathroom drawer. She’ll never notice. Sometimes I find sad envelopes, the ones with red and blue stripes, meaning these envelopes fly, meaning thin feathers, meaning bird with a little worm in the beak. Envelopes from her father, I think—she snatches them from my hand & says, No, no, where did you get these? Now put them back.

      On Listening to Your Teacher Take Attendance

      Breathe deep even if it means you wrinkle

      your nose from the fake-lemon antiseptic

      of the mopped floors and wiped-down

      doorknobs. The freshly soaped necks

      and armpits. Your teacher means well,

      even if he butchers your name like

      he has a bloody sausage casing stuck

      between his teeth, handprints

      on his white, sloppy apron. And when

      everyone turns around to check out

      your face, no need to flush red and warm.

      Just picture all the eyes as if your classroom

      is one big scallop with its dozens of icy blues

      and you will remember that winter your family

      took you to the China Sea and you sank

      your face in it to gaze at baby clams and sea stars

      the size of your outstretched hand. And when

      all those necks start to crane, try not to forget

      someone once lathered their bodies, once patted them

      dry with a fluffy towel after a bath, set out their clothes

      for the first day of school. Think of their pencil cases

      from third grade, full of sharp pencils, a pink pearl eraser.

      Think of their handheld pencil sharpener and its tiny blade.

      The Origin of Feathers on My Windshield

      The pelicans dip their brilliant sloppy bills

      into their tired shoulders and there is a certain bridge

      in Florida where you have to be careful not to hit them

      as they fly across windshields. I lost the only picture

      of me taken by a man who used to be the boy I loved

      when I was fifteen. When this man last visited me,

      all the pretty rivers in town were tannin-stained

      from a certain oak-and-chestnut mess. We walked

      carefully through glass galleries and a little bakery

      that sold a single gold-dipped strawberry. I was the girl

      whose hands gave up chewing through a dahlia long ago.

      Even he has crawled too far across soil to turn back now.

      And truth be told, so have I. I am like a man who prefers

      the taste of his own tongue instead of the lips of summer.

      My shadow and the shadow of sunflowers are the same.

      Sea Church

      Give me a church

      made entirely of salt.

      Let the walls hiss

      and smoke when

      I return to shore.

      I ask for the grace

      of a new freckle

      on my cheek, the lift

      of blue and my mother’s

      soapy skin to greet me.

      Hide me in a room

      with no windows.

      Never let me see

      the dolphins leaping

      into commas

      for this waterprayer

      rising like a host

      of paper lanterns

      in the inky evening.

      Let them hang

      in


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