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CHOCOLATE AND
CUCKOO CLOCKS
THE ESSENTIAL ALAN COREN
EDITED AND INTRODUCED BY
GILES COREN AND VICTORIA COREN
Contents
Foreword by Giles and Victoria Coren
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1. Present Laughter
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Southgate–San Francisco–Fleet Street: 1960–1969 Introduction by Melvyn Bragg
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2. No, But I Saw the Movie
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3. Through a Glass, Darkly
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4. It Tolls for Thee
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5. … that Fell on the House that Jack Built
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6. Under the Influence of Literature
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7. This Thing with the Lions
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8. Bohemia
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9. The Power and the Glory
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10. Mao, He’s Making Eyes At Me!
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11. Death Duties
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‘The Funniest Writer In Britain Today’: 1970–1979 Introduction by Victoria Wood
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12. Boom, What Makes My House Go Boom?
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13. Suffer Little Children
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14. Ear, Believed Genuine Van Gogh, Hardly Used, What Offers?
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15. Father’s Lib
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16. Let Us Now Phone Famous Men
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17. The Rime of the Ancient Film-maker
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18. Good God, That’s Never The Time, Is It?
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19. Going Cheep
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20. Go Easy, Mr Beethoven, That Was Your Fifth!
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21. Take the Wallpaper in the Left Hand and the Hammer in the Right …
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22. Owing to Circumstances Beyond our Control 1984 has been Unavoidably Detained …
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23. Foreword to Golfing for Cats: An Apology to the Bookseller
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24. Baby Talk, Keep Talking Baby Talk 168
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25. The Hell at Pooh Corner
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26. And Though They Do Their Best To Bring Me Aggravation …
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27. Life mit Vater
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28. Dr No will See You Now
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29. Bottle Party
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30. The Unacknowledged Legislators of the World
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31. The Hounds Of Spring Are On Winter’s Traces, So That’s Thirty-Eight-Pounds-Forty, Plus Making Good, Say, Fifty-Quid
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Appendix: The Bulletins of Idi Amin
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32. All O’ De People, All De Time
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33. A Word F’om De Sponsor
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34. De Whitehall Snub
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35. A Star Gittin’ Born
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