my telephone

      the telephone has not been kind of late,

       of late there have been more and more calls

       from people who want to come over and talk

       from people who are depressed

       from people who are lonely

       from people who just don’t know what to do

       with their time;

       I’m no snob, I try to help, try to suggest something that

       might be of assistance

       but there have been more calls

       more and more calls

       and what the callers don’t realize is that

       I too have

       problems

       and even when I don’t

       it’s

       necessary for me

       sometimes

       just to be alone and quiet and

       doing nothing.

       so the other day

       after many days of listening to depressed and lonely people

       wanting me to assuage their grief,

       I was lying there

       enjoying looking at the ceiling

       when the phone rang

       and I picked it up and said,

       “listen, whatever your problem is or whatever it is you want,

       I can’t help you.”

       after a moment of silence

       whoever it was hung up

       and I felt like a man who had escaped.

      I napped then, perhaps an hour, when the phone rang

       again and I picked it up:

       “whatever your problem is

       I can’t help you!”

      “is this Mr. Chinaski?”

      “yes.”

      “this is Helen at your dentist’s

       office to remind you

       that you have an appointment at

       3:30 tomorrow

       afternoon.”

      I told her I’d be

       there for her.