Mastering Motivation: Motivating Yourself and Others With NLP. Damian Inc. Hamill
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get useful information out of this eBook. One of the great strengths of NLP is that it gives us skills to look at the structure of experience – how things happen. This is very different from navel gazing and speculating on ‘why’ things happen (although ‘why’ can sometimes be interesting too!).
By being able to look at and identify structure, we can figure out how useful things happen and learn how to make them happen more often, or at the times we want. Alternatively, if we keep getting results in life that we don’t want, we can figure out what we keep doing to cause them to happen (even if we didn’t realise we were actively causing these events) and we can interrupt those patterns.
Effectively, in NLP terms, we move from being At Effect – perceiving ourselves to be victims of events, to being At Cause – aware of our power to actively influence the world around us.
If you already have some knowledge of NLP you may know that there is a concept surrounding motivation in NLP that people have a consistent motivational ‘style’ - either ‘Towards’ or ‘Away From’. This is one of NLP’s ‘Meta-programs’ – a group of high level, unconscious filters that influence how people process information from the world around them and respond to it.
People with a ‘Towards’ motivation style may well exist in a comparably comfortable ‘here and now’ but create representations of even more compelling possibilities that they feel motivated to move towards by taking appropriate action.
Those with an ‘Away From’ motivation style, on the contrary, may be content to sit in the status quo, until or unless something develops that makes them uncomfortable and they then choose to act to move Away From the adverse situation. We have no quibble with this concept at all but we will not be focusing on it because we don’t believe it is anything like the full story. We want to give you something richer.
As we look at the concept of motivation through these NLP filters, we will offer you an opportunity from time to time to pause to reflect and carry out a particular task or activity. This will help you to apply what you learn in the context of an example that is meaningful to you. If you prefer to read straight through first time that is okay as well, but we recommend that you read through this eBook again at a later date in the more interactive manner just described. When we do suggest you carry out an activity, it will be useful for you to have some writing materials to hand to jot down some thoughts and information.
Perhaps now would be a good time to take our first pause to think.
Now, let’s help you consolidate some of these ideas by considering the following …
Activity 1 – Experiencing Your Own State of Motivation: Physiology
Earlier, I described motivation as a ‘State’ - a subjective personal experience that can exist at a particular time. You have probably experienced the state of motivation many times in the past without actually taking the time to really explore it. It was there though. It inspired you to act and you acted – that was all there was to it.
Let’s take a few minutes now for a more considered examination. What I would like you to do is this – think of an occasion when you felt really motivated to do something. It doesn’t matter what context it was – work, school, leisure, a social occasion or whatever – as long as it was an occasion when there was something that was to be done and you felt really “up for it”, committed to getting it done - aligned and congruent.
Got one?
Now, take a moment or two just to really experience that time again - as vividly and as fully as possible, as if it is happening right now.
First of all, I want you to notice your physiology – I mean by that your physical awareness.
•What is your posture like? Upright, slouched, leaning in a particular direction, aligned or off-centre?
•What about your muscles? Are they relaxed? Tense? Somewhere in between?
•Is there a difference in such awareness in different parts of your body? For example, is one place relaxed and another place a focus of greater tension?
•Where is your gaze directed? Ahead of you? Above or below eye level? Off to the left or right or along a centre-line?
•Now notice your breathing – what speed is it? Is it deep or shallow? Whereabouts are you breathing from – low in your abdomen, middle of your chest or higher up in your chest?
•Consider now what sense of energy you have in your body? Do you feel energetic or flat or somewhere in between?
•Is there a sense of movement in your body, as if you are being urged to move in a certain direction? If so, what direction do you feel moved to go in?
Once you have noted all that, let’s explore a little bit more.
Activity 2 – Experiencing Your Own State of Motivation: “Mental Picture”
I asked you to be aware of where your gaze was oriented. Wherever that was, just allow your gaze to go there and allow a mental picture of whatever it was you felt motivated to do come to your mind – just let whatever comes to you visually come to you.
Good.
Now, it doesn’t really matter to me what the content of that mental picture is – what you actually see. What I am interested in is how you see it – the specific qualities or building blocks that make up the picture. I’m going to ask you a few questions about the picture and I’d like you to be curious to explore the image and simply make a note of what the answers are, so please ensure you have your pen and paper to hand.
Here goes…
•When you give your attention to the picture I’d like you to notice whether the picture is in colour or in black and white. Just take a moment or two to notice and write down your answer.
•Now bring the picture to mind again and notice whether it’s three dimensional or flat. Again, just write down the answer.
•For this next question I want you to consider where you are in the picture. Can you see yourself in the event as if you are watching from the outside? Or are you viewing the experience as a participant – in your own skin, so to speak, and watching through your own eyes? Take a moment to check.
•Next, I want you to notice how boundaried or expansive the image is. Is it a full, panoramic vista or does it have a frame or some sort of boundary that confines it?
•Now, let’s think about movement. Is the image a still picture, like a snapshot, or is there movement in it, like a motion picture?
•Notice the distance. How far away from you is the picture? Close? Middle distance? Far off? If you could estimate a rough distance what would it be?
•When you have determined distance think about its location. Is the image directly in front of you or off to the left or right? Is it higher than eye level or down below you? Or a combination of a number of these orientations? For example, above eye level but off to the right.
•Having noticed and noted down those factors, I want you to notice its brightness. Is it a bright image or darker in nature?
•And finally, focus. Is the image sharply focussed or is it blurred, fuzzy or hazy?
Ok, so you should now have a list of the various visual characteristics of the mental picture you have created of a motivating experience.
Activity 3 – Experiencing What Doesn’t Motivate You
Having completed that, we are going to do the same for another experience. Think now of an experience that doesn’t motivate you at all. Something that leaves you cold, that you would really rather not have to do, or something that at one level you want to have happen, to get done, but that you just don’t seem to be able to motivate yourself to do. Once you have such an experience in mind I want you again to go through