I, Superhero!! :. Mike McMullen
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like an avenging specter, the glare from across the room that tells him he’s been a bad boy, the warm smile you give him along with a gentle kiss on the forehead after a rainy afternoon of gentle lovemaking. You know, a game face. You need more than one, too, or your enemies will grow accustomed to it, and the effect will be watered down and seem clichéd, like Matthew McConaughey making rom-coms or Tommy Lee giving college girls hepatitis.
After much thought, meditation, and hours spent sitting in front of the bathroom mirror drinking NyQuil and Hot Damn (schnapps) to get my mind right, I’ve come up with ten distinct game faces for The Amazing Whitebread. I suggest you come up with at least five for your own hero. And no fair ripping off mine. They’re all copyright and trademarked My Foot Up Your Ass If You Steal Them.
PHOTO COURTESY MARY ELLEN LACAVA
Manimalistic
PHOTO COURTESY MARY ELLEN LACAVA
All Bid’ness
PHOTO COURTESY MARY ELLEN LACAVA
Hurtin’ fo’ Certain
Your Worst Nightmare (unless you have the one about the bears that escape from the circus and eat your mom’s face—that one’s way worse)
PHOTO COURTESY MARY ELLEN LACAVA
The Mocking Chuckle of Heroism
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
Steaming Pile of Justice in Your Face
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
Calling Dr. Pain
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
The Rabid Squirrel
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
Rage-a-licious
PHOTO COURTESY LIZ LACAVA
The Flared Nostrils of Vigilantism
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