The Son that Changed his Life. Jennifer Taylor
Читать онлайн книгу.
all right, darling,’ she said, running up the stairs and picking him up. She cuddled him close, feeling the tremor that passed through his sturdy little body. The cottage was quite secluded and he wasn’t used to hearing a lot of strange noises during the night.
She carried him downstairs, knowing it was pointless taking him back to bed. Theo needed a little reassurance and there was no one better for that than his mummy. She reached the last tread and stopped, only then realising that Ben was still standing where she’d left him. She’d expected him to beat a hasty retreat as soon as he’d heard Theo but, oddly enough, he was still there.
She glanced at him and felt her blood freeze when she saw the expression on his face. Shock, disbelief, amazement were all etched there clear to see. For a moment Emily couldn’t understand what was going on and then it struck her in a blinding flash what had happened. Ben had finally been forced to acknowledge the truth. Now that he’d seen Theo, he could no longer claim he wasn’t the child’s father. The resemblance which had been so apparent to her from the moment her son had been born couldn’t be denied, although no doubt once Ben recovered his composure, he would do so. Tipping back her head, she looked him straight in the eyes.
‘This is my son, Theo.’
Ben felt as though his body had turned to jelly. His legs were shaking and his insides were trembling as he stared at the little boy clinging hold of Emily’s neck. The resemblance was unmistakable. He had two nephews and this child—Theo?—looked so like them that it was staggering. Had he been wrong? Was it possible that he had fathered this child after all?
‘Right, that’s settled. Alan’s taking Louise with him…’ Tom came back into the cottage. He stopped when he realised that he was interrupting something. He glanced uncertainly from Emily and Theo to Ben then did a double take, and Ben knew—he just knew!—that Tom had seen it too, seen the resemblance between him and Emily’s son.
It was all too much to take in and far too much to deal with. Swinging round, Ben strode out of the door, hearing Emily’s murmured response when Tom said something to her before he quickly followed him. He got into the back of the second Land Rover, cramming himself into the corner as Tom got in beside him. The rest of the team had divided themselves between the vehicles as best they could with the stretcher taking up so much room. It was a squeeze to fit everyone in but he didn’t care. At least Tom couldn’t ask him any awkward questions, awkward because he had no idea what the answers were. Had he been mistaken, had he seen something in the child that wasn’t there? Maybe he could have convinced himself if his friend hadn’t seen it too!
The drive back to town was completed in silence, at least on their behalf. The rest of the group was buoyed up by the fact that they’d found the missing couple. They tried to persuade him and Tom to join them for a celebratory pint at The Ship but Ben refused. He needed to be on his own, needed to sort out how he felt and after that, more importantly, he needed to work out what he was going to do. If the child was his then his whole life was about to change.
‘How about a nightcap?’ Tom let them in, closing the door quietly so as not to disturb Hannah and Charlie who were asleep upstairs. ‘You look as though you could do with one, if you don’t mind me saying so.’
‘Feel free.’ Ben sighed as he followed Tom into the sitting room. Maybe he would prefer to be alone but he could hardly refuse to talk to Tom. Slumping down in a chair, he looked at his friend with sardonic amusement. ‘It’s been an eventful night, one way and another.’
‘It has indeed.’ Tom handed him a glass of single malt then sat down. ‘Am I right in thinking that tonight turned out to be rather a shock for you?’
‘Yes.’ Ben took a sip of the fiery liquid and let it trickle down his throat.
‘So you had no idea about Theo?’
‘Yes and no.’ Another sip of whisky followed the first and the fire reached his belly. He had a son, a child of his own, something he had never dared hope he would have. Shock slowly started to turn to something more, the first glimmer of a far more positive emotion, but he battened it down. He didn’t want to get ahead of himself, didn’t want to believe the evidence of his eyes with nothing to back it up.
‘Yes and no? I don’t understand. Either you knew that Theo was yours or you didn’t. Which is it?’
‘Emily told me she was expecting my child but I didn’t believe her.’ The words sounded so bald that the burgeoning feeling of euphoria disappeared. They obviously had a detrimental effect on Tom too because his tone sharpened.
‘Why the hell not? Emily’s not the sort of woman who’d string a guy along. Anyone who knows her will tell you that.’
Ben grimaced, aware that he had sunk more than a little in his friend’s estimation. ‘I didn’t believe her because I thought I was incapable of fathering a child.’
‘Really? How come?’
Tom’s tone was less abrasive and Ben sighed. Although he rarely talked about what had happened this was one time when he needed to open up.
‘I had Hodgkin’s lymphoma when I was in my twenties.’ He shrugged. ‘I had chemotherapy and I was told that it was unlikely I would be able to father a child because of the combination of drugs I’d received. A subsequent fertility test seemingly proved that.’
‘I had no idea!’ Tom exclaimed.
Ben smiled wryly. ‘It’s not something I talk about normally.’
‘No. I can understand that.’ Tom frowned. ‘So, what you’re saying is that you’ve always believed you were infertile?’
Ben nodded. ‘Yes. When Emily came to see me in Paris, I simply assumed she was lying and that the child wasn’t mine.’
‘But surely you knew her well enough to know that she wouldn’t do something like that?’ Tom protested.
‘Maybe I should have done. However, when you have always believed what you’ve been told, it’s difficult to accept that someone is telling you something very different.’ Ben summoned a smile, trying not to let his friend see how awful he felt. He had been so cruel to Emily that day, turned her away with harsh words instead of offering her the support she’d deserved. He couldn’t bear to think how she must have suffered.
‘I suppose so.’
Tom sounded dubious and Ben realised that his friend still considered him to be at fault in some way. The fact that he felt he was too didn’t make him feel any better. They both drank a little more whisky before Tom spoke again and there was a definite challenge in his voice.
‘So what are you going to do? Are you going to try and sort out this mess or are you planning on leaving the situation as it is?’
‘Obviously, it needs sorting out. If I’m Theo’s father then there is no way that I intend to turn my back on him. I want to be involved in his life.’
‘If Emily will let you.’
‘Oui. If Emily will let me,’ Ben agreed flatly. ‘I would not blame her if she refused. When I recall what I said to her that day…’ He broke off and shrugged.
Tom shook his head. ‘It seems to me that you’ve a lot of ground to make up. If I can help in any way then just ask. However, I have a feeling that only you can work this out, you and Emily, that is.’ Tom downed the rest of his drink and stood up. He patted Ben on the shoulder as he passed. ‘Why don’t you sleep on it? Most problems appear better after a night’s rest, I find.’
Ben stayed where he was as Tom headed upstairs. He swirled the whisky around the glass. Would there be a solution in the morning though? Would he know how to approach Emily and make his apologies? Would she accept them? He had accused her of lying about something so important and he wouldn’t blame her if she refused to have anything to do with him. Tom was right because he should have realised that Emily would never try to deceive him that way. Even though they had known each other for such a short