Savage Atonement. PENNY JORDAN
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she came round she was in the headmistress’s office. Miss Kellaway was there, but there was no sign of the man. Matron was also there and another young woman whom the headmistress introduced as Rachel from the Social Services Department, the significance of which didn’t dawn on her until much later.
‘Now, Laurel,’ the headmistress began kindly, ‘don’t be frightened. We’re here to help you, you know, my dear.…’ She paused, coughed and looked a little embarrassed.
‘Laurel, Miss Kellaway tells me that some time ago you came to school with a bad bruise on your arm. And now today, when you fainted… your body is very badly bruised, my dear, and.…’
The social worker interrupted gently, ‘What Miss Laker is trying to say, Laurel, is that we believe you may have been sexually abused.… Yes, I know you don’t want to talk about it, don’t want to admit it even to yourself, but you aren’t the first girl it’s happened to, Laurel, and you won’t be the last. We only want to help you, and there’s nothing to be frightened of. You do know, don’t you, that it’s illegal for someone to have sexual relations with a girl under sixteen? And it’s silly to get involved with such a rough boy-friend. Have you got a boy-friend, Laurel?’
She managed to shake her head, her whole body burning with the shame of what was happening to her. How could they understand? How could they know how she felt; how guilty and tainted; how much she hated her body?
‘Matron will have to examine you, Laurel,’ Rachel, the social worker, was saying in a soothing voice. ‘Nothing to be afraid of. If you’ll just go with her now.…’
Like a limp rag doll, Laurel went with her. The examination was painful and to Laurel humiliating, although she knew that Matron was deliberately trying not to hurt her, but afterwards she was sick, and she was still shivering when she was taken back to the headmistress’s study.
‘Matron tells us that you’re still a virgin, Laurel,’ Rachel announced, ‘But I don’t believe that you were a willing participant in whatever happened to you. We want to help you, dear. Why don’t you tell us about it?’
She wanted to, but Bill had warned her that if she told anyone they wouldn’t believe her.
As though she knew what she was thinking Rachel said softly, ‘You have a stepfather, Laurel—was it him?’
She started to cry then and Rachel had comforted her, gently drawing the whole story out of her.
‘Now listen to me, Laurel,’ she said when she had finished. ‘You are in no way to blame, in no way at all. You mustn’t think that.’ Over Laurel’s head her eyes met Miss Kellaway’s. ‘Men like him ought to be shot,’ she said bitterly. ‘When I think of the damage he might have done.…!
‘Now, Laurel,’ she said quietly, ‘for your own sake it might be better if you lived away from home for a while. Not for punishment,’ she added quickly, ‘but to protect you.’
‘My mother.…’
‘Don’t worry, we’ll explain everything to her.’
Laurel hadn’t argued, thankfully believing that her ordeal was over, but it was only just beginning.
THE Social Services Department installed Laurel with foster-parents; the start of the summer holidays meant that she didn’t have to endure the curious questions of her classmates, and Miss Kellaway visited her regularly.
The only person who didn’t visit her was her mother, and when Laurel asked repeatedly why, Rachel explained that she wasn’t well.
‘Try to understand, Laurel,’ she explained. ‘Your mother feels unbearably guilty because she exposed you to Bill Trenchard, and because she can’t face up to that guilt she had shifted it on to you. In her eyes you’re the guilty one, even though in her heart she knows that isn’t true.’
‘You mean she doesn’t want to see me?’
Rachel sighed. This was one of the most heartbreaking cases she had had to deal with, and she longed to be able to do something concrete to help Laurel. The poor child’s life lay in ruins around her, while the man responsible.… Her mouth tightened and she took hold of Laurel firmly, noticing as she did so how the thin shoulders flinched. Later on Laurel might benefit from talking to their child psychiatrist, but for the moment the scars were too new, too raw.
‘Try to understand, Laurel, your mother has always been weak, has always needed someone to lean on.’
It was true, Laurel acknowledged, but she needed someone to lean on too. It came to her then that the only person anyone could safely rely on was themselves; that it was foolish to place any trust or reliance in another human being.
‘We intend to prosecute Bill Trenchard,’ Rachel informed her. ‘He’s guilty of sexually molesting a minor, and he must be punished for that, Laurel. You understand that, don’t you?’ Because if you don’t help us some other girl will suffer—perhaps worse.’
Rachel meant that she still had her virginity, but her entire body and soul felt scorched, all emotion and feeling burned out of them.
‘Would I have to tell people what happened?’
‘Yes, but it will be worth it, Laurel, I promise you that.’ And because she liked and respected Rachel Laurel believed her; believed that for the sake of some unknown girl Bill had yet to meet she had to see that justice was done. In those days she had still been naïve enough to believe that the truth must always be believed and respected, and even though her soul cringed from the thought of having to tell anyone about what had happened, because she knew not to do so was taking the cowardly way out, Laurel agreed.
It got into the papers—how, she didn’t know, and although her foster-parents wanted to keep the articles away from her Rachel and the lawyer she brought to see her insisted that she must read them.
‘Your stepfather obviously intends to claim that you led him on,’ the lawyer explained to her, ‘and I have to ask you, Laurel, did you?’
The look of sick revulsion in her eyes convinced him.
‘I hate these cases,’ he told Rachel later. ‘And I’ve heard the stepfather intends to use Rowland Blandish. He’s red-hot on defences for this type of case. I doubt if he’ll get him off, but he’ll really put her through it. I’ll try to prepare her as much as I can.…’
‘But he’s guilty,’ Rachel protested, ‘and he might have destroyed her as a woman for ever. If you could have seen the look on her face when the school inspector touched her!’
‘She’s a sensitive child, which will make it ten times worse for her, and I agree with you, he’s got to be brought to justice, but it’s the mother I’m worried about. I tried to see her, but apparently she’s confined to bed with a heart condition.’
‘She refuses to see or communicate with Laurel, but then that’s quite usual. In these cases the mother normally knows quite well what’s going on and chooses to ignore it, but of course we aren’t talking about incest here, we’re talking about attempted rape.’
‘Far harder to prove,’ he warned her. ‘And the courts and the public are hardening their hearts more and more against the victims; there’s been too much press coverage on the subject; too many “claims” that have proved to be lies.’
‘But in Laurel’s case.…’
‘Rowland Blandish will try to persuade the jury that Laurel led Trenchard on. She’s a very attractive girl, Rachel, and whether we like it or not there are men who are always eager to convince themselves that teenage girls are eager for sex. You know that.’
‘Yes,’ Rachel agreed soberly, ‘but Laurel isn’t like that. I’m frightened for her.’
Mercifully