The Ice Maiden's Sheikh. Alexandra Sellers
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better to avoid the personal.
Silence fell between them. Latif concentrated on his driving. One of the press cars passed, a camera trained on them, and then roared off in a cloud of exhaust.
She couldn’t stop irritably turning the conversation over in her head. Why was he pushing her? What business was it of Latif Abd al Razzaq’s where she lived?
“Why are you carrying my mother’s banner?” she demanded after a short struggle. “From her it’s just about understandable. What’s your angle? Why do you care what I do with my life?”
In the silence that fell, Jalia watched a muscle leap in his jaw. She had the impression that he was struggling for words.
“Do you not care about this country?” he demanded at last, his voice harsh and grating on her. “Bagestan has suffered serious loss to its professional and academic class over the past thirty years—too many educated people fled abroad. If its citizens who were born abroad do not return… You are an al Jawadi by birth, granddaughter of the deposed Sultan. Do you not feel that the al Jawadi should show the way?”
Jalia felt a curious, indefinable sense of letdown.
“You’ve already convinced my parents to return,” she said coolly, for Latif’s efforts on their behalf, tracking down titles to her family’s expropriated property and tracing lost art treasures grabbed by Ghasib’s favourites, had been largely successful, paving the way for them to make the shift.
“And my younger sister is considering it. Why can’t you be satisfied with that?”
“Your parents are retirement age. Your sister is a schoolgirl.”
Jalia was now feeling the pressure. “Nice to have a captive audience!” she snapped. “Is this why you decided I should come with you on this wild-goose chase? You wanted to deliver a lecture? Do you enjoy preaching duty to people? You should have been a mullah, Latif! Maybe it’s not too late even now!”
He flashed her a look. “My opinion would not anger you if you did not, in your heart, accept what I say. It is yourself you are angry with—the part that tells you you have a duty that is larger than your personal life.”
She was, oddly, lost for an answer to this ridiculous charge. It simply wasn’t true. Neither in her heart nor her head did she feel any obligation to return to Bagestan to nurture its recovery from thirty years of misrule. Until a few weeks ago she hadn’t spent one day in the country of her parents’ birth—why should she now be expected to treat it as her own homeland?
In spite of her parents’ best efforts to prevent it, England was home to her.
“Look—I’ve got a life to live, and I’ve paid a price for the choices I’ve made. Why should I now throw away the sense of belonging I’ve struggled for all my life, and reach for another to put in its place? I don’t belong here, however deeply my parents do. I never will.”
He didn’t answer, and another long silence fell, during which he watched the road and she gazed out at the vast stretch of desert, thinking.
Her parents had tried to keep her from feeling she belonged in England, the land of her birth, and she was resentfully aware that to some extent they had succeeded. Her sense of place was less rooted than her friends’—she had always known that.
Maybe that was why she clung so firmly to what she did feel. She knew how difficult it was to find a sense of belonging. Such things didn’t come at will.
At the time of the coup some three decades ago, her parents had been newly married. Her mother, one of the daughters of the Sultan’s French wife, Sonia, and her father, scion of a tribal chief allied by blood and marriage to the al Jawadi for generations past, had both been in grave danger from Ghasib’s squad of assassins. They had fled to Parvan and taken new identities, and the then King of Parvan, Kavad Panj, had put the couple on the staff of the Parvan Embassy in London.
Jalia had passed her childhood in a country that was not “her own,” raised on dreams of the land that was. As she grew older, she began to fear the power of those dreams that gripped her parents so inescapably, and to resent that distant homeland from which she was forever banished. From a child who had thrived on the tales of another landscape, another people, another way of being, she had grown into a sceptical, wary teenager determined to avoid the trap her parents had set for her.
When she turned sixteen they had told her the great secret of their lives—they were not ordinary Bagestani exiles, but members of the royal family. Sultan Hafzuddin, the deposed monarch who had figured so largely in her bedtime stories, was her own grandfather.
Jalia had been sworn to secrecy, but the torch had to be passed to her hands: one day the monarchy would be restored, and if her parents did not live to see that day, Jalia must go to the new Sultan….
Her parents had lived to see the day. And now Jalia’s life was threatened with total disruption. Her parents, thrilled to join the great Return, were urgent that their elder daughter should do the same. But Jalia knew that in Bagestan something mysterious and powerful threatened her, the thing that had obsessed her parents from her earliest memories.
And she did not want to foster the empty dream that she “belonged” in an alien land that she neither knew nor understood. That way lay lifelong unhappiness.
Attending the Coronation had been an inescapable necessity, but it had been a brief visit, no more—until her foolish cousin Noor had undertaken to fall madly in lust with Bari al Khalid, one of the Sultan’s new Cup Companions, and promised to marry him.
“Showing the way for us all!” Jalia’s mother declared, wiping from her eye a tear which in no way clouded its beady gaze on her elder daughter.
Her mother had been convinced then that Jalia had only to flutter her lashes to similarly knock Latif Abd al Razzaq to his knees, and was almost desperate for her daughter to make the attempt.
Princess Muna had wasted no time in checking out the handsome Cup Companion’s marital status and background: not merely the Sultan’s Cup Companion, but since the death of his father two years ago, the leader of his tribe.
“He’s called the Shahin, Jalia. No one’s sure whether the word is an ancient word for king or really does mean falcon, as the myth says, but the holder of that title is traditionally one of the most respected voices on the Tribal Council. Not that Ghasib ever consulted the council, but the Sultan will.”
Although Jalia hadn’t believed for a minute that the fierce-eyed sheikh was attracted to her, the mere thought of what complications would ensue if he or any Bagestani should declare himself had terrified her. She had gone home as soon as politeness allowed.
Of course she couldn’t refuse to return to Bagestan for the wedding, but this time she had come with insurance—Michael’s engagement ring on her finger. Now when she was asked whether she intended to make the Return, Jalia could dutifully murmur that she had her future husband to consider. No one could argue with that.
“Why do you say this is a wild-goose chase?”
The Cup Companion’s voice broke in on her thoughts. Jalia jolted back into the here and now and gazed at him for a moment.
“You think Noor ran of her own accord, do you?” she said at last.
“She was seen driving the car herself.”
“And if that’s so, it means she’s changed her mind about the wedding?”
“Do you doubt it?”
Jalia shrugged. That wasn’t her point. “That being the case, do you honestly imagine that, even assuming we find her, we’re just going to bring her meekly back to marry Bari?”
“Women do not always know their own minds,” Latif said with comfortable masculine arrogance.
It was the kind of thing that made her want to hit him. Jalia sat with her fists clenching in her lap.
“Is that so?”