Beneath The Surface. Linda Turner
Читать онлайн книгу.and pushing her to join.
It was too much too fast, and almost immediately, Abby’s insecurities kicked in. “I’m not sure I’m ready to do this,” she said, abruptly rising to her feet. “I’ll think about it and get back to you.”
“Please don’t rush off,” Judy begged. “You’re just nervous. Everyone is at first.”
Torn, she hesitated. “I don’t even know why I talked myself into this. I’m lousy at dating. I get all tongue-tied and sound like I don’t have a brain in my head. And now I want to pay to put myself through that torture? It’s crazy!”
Judy grinned. “Put that way, I have to agree with you. But this isn’t about the money. You know that. It’s about taking a chance, putting yourself out there and possibly being rejected. No one wants to go through that.”
“My point exactly. So give me one good reason why I should do it?”
“I’ll do better than that,” she replied soberly. “I’ll give you three.” Holding up her hand, she counted them off on her fingers. “A husband. Children. Happily ever after. You’ll never have any of those things if you’re not willing to take a chance on love.”
Just that easily, she brought the sting of tears to Abby’s eyes. She did want all those things—she always had. She just didn’t know how to get them.
Sinking back into her chair, she was horrified to feel the tears spill over her lashes. “I’m sorry to be such a baby. This is just so hard.”
An understanding smile curled the corners of Judy’s mouth. Reaching for the box of tissues on the corner of her desk, she held it out to her. “I’ve been where you are. I felt the same way, then I joined the Right One, and my life changed almost overnight.”
Wiping her eyes, Abby arched a brow in surprise. “It was that easy?”
“No,” she admitted honestly. “It took time and effort, but it was worth it. If you sign up with us, you’ll get a printout on all the men we match you up with. I’ll warn you up front that they all look good on paper. Unfortunately, even jerks and chauvinists and bores join dating services. But so do some really great men. It’s your job to figure out which is which and find Mr. Right.”
“Do you do any type of screening or background checks? I’d just as soon avoid the jerks and chauvinists, but it’s the perverts and druggies and con men I’m worried about.”
Judy didn’t, thankfully, discount her concerns. “You have a right to be worried about that. Unlike some other dating services, we do a criminal background check on our prospective clients. Our dating counselors are very astute. If we have any doubts about a prospective client, even if we don’t find anything on them, we don’t sign them up. And everyone has to fill out a psychological profile. That tells us a lot about a person. If we’re not comfortable with their answers, we suggest they go to another dating service.
“It’s not a foolproof method,” she acknowledged, “but we haven’t had any complaints so far, and we’ve been in business ten years. So what do you say?” she challenged. “Are you game? I promise you you’ll meet some wonderful men.”
In the past, Abby would have thanked her for the information, then gone home and thought about it. In the end, though, she wouldn’t have done anything…because she was afraid to take a chance. God, she hated being so timid! She’d been playing it safe all her life, and what had it gotten her? Guys like Dennis! She was tired of hiding in the shadows and settling for obnoxious men because she thought she wasn’t good enough to attract someone better. She was a good person and she was going to do this for herself. If it turned out to be a mistake, then she’d do like the rest of the world and live with the consequences of her actions. At least she’d be taking charge of her life and really living instead of just existing!
Straightening her shoulders, she said, “I’m game. What do we do first?”
“The psychological test,” Judy replied with a pleased smile. “It takes about two hours— the first two hours of the rest of your life. Let’s get started.”
Already wondering if she’d lost her mind, Abby didn’t even consider backing out. Reaching for the questionnaire the other woman held out to her, she quickly began to fill it out.
Logan St. John looked at his brother and sister as if they had lost their minds. “You did what?!”
“Now, don’t get mad,” his sister, Patty, said hurriedly. “We just wanted to help you.”
His blue eyes dark with concern, his younger brother, Carter, agreed. “We’re worried about you. Ever since Faith died, you’ve become a recluse. You go to work, then come home and just stare at her picture. I know you loved her, but dammit, Logan, it’s been a year! You have to go on with your life.”
“I’m not going to a dating service,” he said flatly. “So you can just call whoever talked you into this and tell them you want your money back.”
His sister and brother exchanged a look. “We can’t,” Patty finally admitted. “They don’t give refunds.”
“This didn’t come cheap,” Carter added.
When he named an outrageous sum, Logan swore roundly. “You’ve lost your minds! Did either one of you ever stop to think that if I wanted to date, I would?”
“We were just trying to help,” Patty replied. “Okay, so we should have asked you. But we knew you would say no.”
“Because I don’t want to date!”
“No one does when they’re still mourning the death of a relationship,” Carter retorted. “We know you loved Faith. You two were perfect for each other. But she’s gone, Logan, and you’re miserable.”
“I’m coping.”
“No, you’re not,” he argued. “Look at yourself. You haven’t had a haircut in months, you need a shave, you don’t laugh anymore.”
“My wife died in a car wreck,” he growled. “I fell in love with her when I was in ninth grade and never looked at another woman. She was all I ever wanted. Do you really think I care what I look like?”
“That’s just it,” Patty stated quietly. “You don’t care about anything. You’ve cut yourself off from your friends and family, you bite people’s heads off. I can’t remember the last time I saw you smile, let alone laugh. And that makes me sad. You’re not the brother I grew up with. You’re not the man who loved Faith.”
“Faith wouldn’t be happy with you if she could see you,” Carter added. “In fact, she’d probably tell you off.”
Logan started to argue, only to shut his mouth with a snap. They were right. Faith had loved life, loved to laugh, loved to make him laugh. The last thing she would want was for him to hole up in the house, mourning her.
But he still loved her! He always would. How could he even think about going out with another woman when the only one he wanted to be with was Faith?
“You can’t expect me to act as if she never existed,” he said hoarsely. “I didn’t stop loving her just because she died.”
“Of course you didn’t,” Patty said, horrified that he thought they were asking such a thing of him. “You loved her since you were a freshman in high school. She will always own a piece of your heart. But you have to go on with your life, Logan. You have to get out, meet people. We thought this might be the best way.”
He should say no. A dating service? What were they thinking? Did they even realize what they were asking of him? He was thirty-five years old, and he’d only kissed one woman in his life, only made love to one woman. Faith. The love of his life. How could he even consider taking out another woman? He’d feel as if he were committing adultery.
But Carter and Patty had paid a ridiculous amount of money to the dating service to pull him