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couldn’t, just couldn’t, risk becoming even slightly involved in the life of a vulnerable child and riding the emotional roller-coaster along with him and his father.
But, a little voice whispered, it’s not as if he’s asking you to be a mother to his child.
It didn’t matter if he was asking or not. He wasn’t the kind of man who would put his child aside for anyone. If he had been, she couldn’t love him the way she did.
And she did. Love him. With all her heart and soul, and would for the rest of her days.
But be a mother to his child? If it ever came to that?
No.
She didn’t know how.
She wasn’t up to the task. She couldn’t be objective enough, and soon, in all likelihood, she and Leith would end up disagreeing about what was best for Peter and he would be caught in the middle, her own objectivity compromised by a lifetime of hurt. Of course it was impossible.
She couldn’t be with Leith. Her throat closed. All her dreams of a fairy-tale ending had been just that—a dream.
Flinging back the covers, Cassie dragged herself out of bed and started getting dressed. There was still the rest of her packing and a thousand other things to do and she didn’t want to be here when he returned. Better to end it now, quickly and as pain-free as possible. Leith and his son deserved better. They deserved someone who could be part of their family, not a damaged woman who had no intention of being a mother—not even a stepmother—particularly not a stepmother. If she couldn’t risk not loving a child of her own enough, how could she risk not loving Leith’s son? And Leith would demand it. If she were in his shoes, she would feel the same.
As for Peter … The little boy had enough to cope with without a new woman in his father’s life—one who might be there one minute and gone the next.
She tasted the salt of her tears. She loved Leith too much to get in the way of a life with his son. He would forget about her soon enough. But just in case she had to make sure he wouldn’t come after her.
The tightness in her chest hurt.
She scrawled a few lines on a piece of paper she found next to his computer. Then she opened the door and slipped outside.
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