CHAPTER FIVE

      AT LUNCH, remembering Cade’s words from the previous evening, Nicola made an effort to be friendlier. Poised, self-sufficient and self-possessed was the image she wanted to portray, not stiff, standoffish and unapproachable.

      ‘Mum,’ Dee said towards the end of the meal, ‘I was hoping you’d give me a haircut this afternoon for old time’s sake, and I’ll set your hair for you.’

      ‘A girls’ afternoon, darling? Ooh, what fun.’

      Unbidden, pain pierced Nicola’s chest, so sharp it almost made her double over. She swallowed back a gasp and lifted Holly out of her high chair to cuddle the child on her lap. The pain shifted and settled in her side like a stitch. She and Diane once had regular girls’ nights. They’d slather on face masks and paint each other’s nails. Sometimes they’d colour each other’s hair. They’d play their music too loud and share their dreams and plans for the future.

      They hadn’t had one of those sessions in over six months and it was only now Nicola realised how much she’d missed them. She closed her eyes. Diane was still a dear friend. Maybe when Nicola returned home …

      Nausea swirled through her. Diane had listened to all of Nicola’s dreams for the future with Brad. She’d known how much Nicola had yearned for a home and family. She’d known all the hopes Nicola had pinned on Brad. And yet she’d still …

      Nicola buried her face in Holly’s hair. There wouldn’t be any more girls’ days. She didn’t want to hear about Diane’s plans for the future with Brad. She wasn’t sure she could stand it.

      She shook herself, bounced Holly up and down until the child giggled. She would get over this. She would! In the interests of saving an important friendship. First, though, she needed to put a protective barrier around her heart so she would be able to bear it.

      She concentrated on her breathing. Eventually she wouldn’t mind hearing Diane talk about Brad. One day she wouldn’t think twice about seeing them together. One day the sense of betrayal that could still turn her days dark would drain away, leaving nothing more than a faint mark.

      She just wished that day would hurry up and arrive.

      ‘Nicola, darling?’

      She snapped to and found Verity smiling at her. She made herself smile back. ‘Yes?’

      ‘My darling girl, I would just love to get my hands on your hair.’

      She would? She touched a self-conscious hand to her hair. These days she just washed it and pulled it back into a ponytail. No fuss. No frills. She suddenly realised she hadn’t been near a hairdresser in over four months.

      ‘Mum is magic with hair,’ Dee said.

      There was no denying that Verity was a very stylish woman. So was Dee, just in a younger, more relaxed way.

      ‘Take it out of its band for a moment,’ Verity ordered.

      She complied. Holly laughed and reached for it. Nicola distracted her with a napkin. Shredded paper was a whole lot less painful than pulled hair.

      Verity studied Nicola for a long moment. ‘Hmm …’

      Nicola forced herself not to fidget under that gaze, but it occurred to her that she must seem such a frump to these two lovely women. She glanced at Harry for solidarity. Harry’s hair and skin glowed with good health, but the housekeeper was totally unconcerned with her appearance.

      Harry shook her head. ‘There’s no denying that Verity has a way with these things. But listen you two …’ She pointed a finger at Verity and Dee. ‘Our Nic isn’t the fussy sort. She won’t want to spend half an hour each morning blow-drying and straightening or curling or any of that other nonsense.’

      Lord, no!

      And then she realised that Harry had called her ‘our Nic’ and her eyes filled. For a moment she felt as if she belonged.

      Verity gave a sudden nod. ‘I would take two to three inches off so your hair sat just above your collarbone and I’d layer it to give it some body and movement.’ She tapped a finger to her lips. ‘And I’d put in a long side fringe. I think it would really make the most of your beautiful eyes.’

      ‘Ooh, yes!’ Dee practically danced in her seat. ‘It’d be long enough to still pull back because, whatever anyone says, it’s hellishly hot out here. Ooh, ooh!’ She danced in her seat some more. Her enthusiasm made Nicola laugh. ‘You could scrunch dry it with a bit of mousse and I bet it’d go deliciously curly.’

      ‘Or, if you wanted, you could blow-dry it for a more formal look,’ Verity said.

      ‘And I think some light streaks through the crown.’

      ‘That would be lovely.’

      Dee grinned. ‘What do you say, Nicola? A girls’ afternoon would be such fun!’

      ‘Count me out,’ Harry said promptly.

      ‘Besides,’ Dee added, ‘you deserve a treat. Since we arrived you’ve taken the boys under your wing and I’ve hardly had to lift a finger. I can’t tell you how much I’ve relished that little holiday.’

      Nicola had enjoyed adding Simon and Jamie to her little group. It had been fun. They didn’t need to treat her for doing her job. But …

      A new haircut?

      Another step towards a new her?

      Ella suddenly pouted. ‘You said we could make Christmas decorations this afternoon.’ Simon and Jamie added their protests too.

      Nicola pulled her hair back into its ponytail. No matter how alluring the vision of female friendship and a new image promised to be, she was here first and foremost as a nanny. ‘So I did. And I never break a promise.’

      Dee grinned at her niece. ‘I’ll make a deal with you, Ella. You get Nicola for the next hour and then …’ She glanced at Harry.

      ‘And then I’ll drag the paddling pool out and you can all have a splash about,’ the older woman announced.

      A cheer went up from Ella, Simon and Jamie. Holly bounced, threw her shredded napkin in the air and sent Nicola a toothy grin. Nicola couldn’t help but smile back with her whole heart.

      Cade promptly pushed away from the opposite side of the table, a dazed expression on his face. She’d been aware of him the entire meal, but had done her very best to ignore him. The memory of last night’s kiss was still too vivid … and far too compelling.

      ‘Is that okay with you, Cade?’ she asked as something midway between a scowl and a grimace shadowed his face. Maybe he’d wanted to do something with Ella and Holly this afternoon and had needed her assistance, or—

      He shook his head. ‘I should’ve left ten minutes ago when haircuts and stuff came up. Secret women’s business,’