Heart Of Courage. Sue MacKay
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oblivious to the hustle going on around her. The breath stalled in his lungs as he drank in the sight of that tall, slight figure with perfect butt curves that even fatigues did nothing to hide. Or was that his memory filling in the details? Her coppery brown hair hung in a long ponytail down her spine. He hadn’t had a chance to run his hands through that silk, hadn’t kissed her as often as he’d have liked. Both things he’d regretted even when the opportunity hadn’t been there. If he had, would he still be feeling there was so much more to be enjoyed? It wasn’t as if he wanted anything other than a rerun of that one act. If it didn’t happen it wouldn’t be the end of the world, but there was no harm in finding out if she was willing while he was here.
Sophie looked as cool as an iced beer as she straightened to turn side on to place the file in a tray.
Cooper gasped, the air exploding out of his lungs. His head spun so fast he closed his eyes tight in an attempt to stop it, to remain upright. Opening them again, the picture was exactly the same. He went hot, then cold, hot again. Thud, thud, thud slammed his heart. He swallowed—hard—but the sourness remained in his mouth. His hands clenched at his sides as he stared at the sexy woman he’d come to see with the idea of having a meal somewhere off base, hopefully followed by an evening in the sack. He had not come to be delivered a hand grenade that the pin had been pulled from.
‘Cooper?’ She was coming towards him, colour spilling into her cheeks. No longer cool. Shocked. Surprised. No. Make that uneasy. Which made perfect sense given the situation. She said, ‘I heard you were stopping off for a couple of days on your way home.’
He fought the urge to back away. A coward he was not, but this was...enormous. Wrong word. He could even be wrong about what he saw. No, not about that, but about his role in the situation.
‘I’ve just flown in from the east, landed a couple of hours ago.’
Her eyes widened. So she’d picked up on the fact he hadn’t wasted any time dropping in on her.
‘I heard you were still here and thought I’d say hello.’
Getting yourself in deeper, bud.
She’d reached him and stood staring, hands on hips, caution darkening those emerald eyes that had haunted him in the deep of the night. Her voice wavered as she said, ‘This is my last week here before I’m shipped back home to finish my contract in Auckland.’
She was going to Auckland? So was he. The day after tomorrow. Auckland was big. They’d never cross paths. Coward. That’s what phones were for. Contacting people. ‘I guess you’re looking forward to that. The heat must be playing havoc with you.’ He nodded abruptly at her very pregnant belly.
She’s carrying a baby. He bit down on the expletives spewing across his tongue. Dread was cranking up from deep within. He had an awful feeling about this. A dreadful sensation that his world was rolling sideways and would never be the same again.
Sophie rubbed her lower back while her gaze was fixed on some spot behind him. ‘Yes, the heat’s exhausting, but it’s more that I want to be home before this baby makes her entrance.’ Now both her hands moved onto her belly in a protective gesture, as though she was afraid of, or warding off, something. Or someone.
Him? His reaction? He strove to be calm, barely held onto the question hovering on the tip of his tongue. When he thought it safe to open his mouth he asked, ‘You don’t want a little Aussie?’ Who cared? Avoiding asking what he desperately needed to know and yet was afraid to find out was only stalling, not solving a thing.
‘I’d prefer to be with my friends.’
Friends, not family. Showed how little he knew about her. ‘How far along are you?’ His breath caught in the back of his throat as he waited for her answer. It had been over seven months since the bombing in Bamiyan, since they’d found solace in each other’s bodies. Was the baby his? If it was, why hadn’t she told him about it? But why should she? What would she want from him? Apparently nothing, if it was his. There’d been no contact from her since that night, which in itself was unusual in his experience of women. If the baby wasn’t his, then whose?
Sophie lifted her head, her chin jutting out as she said quietly, firmly, ‘Seven and a half months. She’s yours.’
He reeled back on his heels. Her direct reply knocked the air out of him and had his stomach sucking in on itself. It was one thing to wonder if he was the father; completely different to learn he actually was. Again heat flooded him. ‘I see.’
Huh? I do?
Goosebumps lifted his skin. According to this woman he’d spent barely half a dozen hours with in total he’d made her pregnant. Should he believe her without question? Just accept her word for it without DNA testing? They’d had sex once. Once. What were the odds? How could he trust her to be telling the truth when he knew next to nothing about her?
Sophie was standing tall, her arms now at her sides, her hands fisted, her chin jutting out further, her eyes daring him to challenge her statement.
And just like that he knew she hadn’t lied, wasn’t trying to tie him into anything he didn’t want. The tension left him. Then it was back, gripping him harder, tightening the muscles in his gut, his legs, his arms.
I don’t want to be a father.
Did Sophie want to be a mother? Obviously she did or she’d have terminated the pregnancy, wouldn’t she? She didn’t know he never intended being a parent, or getting into a long-term relationship. That he played the field because he was just like his father, an expert at moving on from woman to woman. Where was the relief? Why wasn’t he falling over backwards in gratitude for her not involving him in this baby’s life? But now she had. There was no avoiding it. ‘We need to talk.’
‘Why?’
‘Don’t play games, Sophie. I’d like to know more about this baby, and how you’re keeping. What I can do for you.’ There. Responsibility kicked in even before he’d thought things through. Thanks to his dad for another lesson he’d learned well. As long as it didn’t backfire on him.
‘That’s easy. Baby and I are healthy, and there’s absolutely nothing I expect from you.’ Despite her determined attitude, a flicker of doubt crossed that intense gaze, and her fists clenched tighter.
Unease rattled him. She did want something. Despite her statement to the contrary, there were things she’d want from him. He’d do the right thing. Stand by her and the baby. But that was the beginning and end of it. He wouldn’t be tied down. Not for the sake of a child. It wouldn’t work. He and Sophie didn’t know anything about each other.
You know the sex can be out of this world.
One great bonk in extenuating circumstances didn’t make a long-lasting relationship. Anyway, it probably wouldn’t be the same again. Want to put that theory to the test? Yeah, he did. But wasn’t going to now.
Another thing against further involvement was that he didn’t do love. Didn’t believe in it. He’d got this far without it. One too many times watching his father’s latest girlfriend pack her bags and leave when he’d been a boy had taught him that getting involved with anyone led to nothing but anguish. It’d hurt every time, watching them walk away after he’d become close and begun to think they might be there as he grew up. Sometimes it had broken him. At first he’d had to learn not to cry, then he’d learned to be stoic, and finally gruff and rude. Love wasn’t anything like it was cracked up to be. Not even the mother of his unborn child was getting a look in. Telling Sophie any of that wasn’t happening, though he still needed to talk to her. ‘What time are you taking a break?’ he snapped, louder than he’d intended.
Sophie stared at him as though searching for something.
He only hoped he could provide whatever it was. All the more reason to go somewhere private before she said anything. ‘Well?’
Looking around the busy room, where heads had lifted at his question, she shrugged, which set his teeth on edge. ‘I can go to lunch any time I like.