In His Loving Care. Jennifer Taylor
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and still do her job during the day. But I honestly thought she’d accepted the idea by now.’
‘It didn’t sound like it from what I heard.’ He thrust an impatient hand through his hair, wondering why he was getting so steamed up. It was up to Helen what she did, yet he couldn’t accept that it was none of his business when she was in serious danger of running herself into the ground. ‘How long have you been using an on-call service?’
‘About a year. Ian refused to use one when he was alive and I think that was why we had such difficulty persuading Helen to sign up.’ Amy shrugged. ‘It’s the old story, I’m afraid—what Ian decided is still law around here.’
‘But can’t she see that it’s time she moved on?’ he exploded. He swung round and walked to the window so that Amy couldn’t see how frustrated he felt. He didn’t want her to start wondering why he was so concerned about Helen’s working habits when he couldn’t explain it himself. He just knew it was wrong for her to be living this way.
‘I know it must have been awful for her to be widowed so young,’ he said over his shoulder. ‘But it’s time she got over it. And clinging to her dead husband’s beliefs isn’t the way to do it.’
‘Lewis,’ Amy said anxiously, but he ignored her, needing to vent the frustration that had been building up inside him all day.
‘She seems to be stuck in some sort of a time warp. That’s why we’re using such an outdated appointment system. It’s as though the world stopped when her husband died, but she needs to understand that it’s time she moved on!’
He glanced round, wondering if he’d said too much, and felt a jolt of alarm hit him when he saw how embarrassed Amy looked. Maybe his remarks had been a little too revealing?
A movement by the door attracted his attention and he turned. Helen was standing outside the room and he knew immediately that she’d heard every word. Her eyes met his for a second and his heart sank when he saw the pain they held. However, before he could attempt to make amends, she hurried away.
‘Oh, dear!’
Amy looked really upset as she quickly left the room. Lewis sympathised with her. He felt dreadful, too. He had just taken everything that Helen held dear and rubbished it. He didn’t think he would ever get over the way she’d looked at him just now—so wounded and betrayed.
He sat down at his desk and put his head in his hands. What had he done?
Helen went straight to her room. There was a buzzing in her head and her legs were trembling. Walking over to the handbasin, she sluiced her face with cold water but the feelings didn’t subside.
She sat down at her desk, wondering what she was going to do. She had to do something, of course. She couldn’t let Lewis get away with what he’d said. She had to make him understand that he was wrong about her…
Only he wasn’t.
She had been stuck in a time warp since Ian had died. She’d been clinging to the past because the future terrified her. What did she have to look forward to? She was a widow of thirty-eight with two grown-up stepchildren and a demanding job.
That was it. There was nothing more, nothing for herself, the woman she was inside, a woman who once had dreamed of having a child of her own and someone to love her for all eternity. Lewis was right—she did devote every waking minute to her job. But what else did she have?
‘I’m sorry you overheard that. I had no right to say what I did and I certainly had no right to involve Amy. Those were my views and they had nothing whatsoever to do with her.’
Helen’s head shot up when she recognised Lewis’s voice. All the fear and frustration she was feeling suddenly seemed to combine into one potent force and she rounded on him.
‘It’s customary to knock before you enter a room. Or don’t you believe the rules which most civilised people live by apply to you, Dr Cole?’
‘I did knock. Obviously, you didn’t hear me.’
He came over to her desk and there was something in his eyes that made her anger suddenly pale in the face of all the other emotions she was experiencing. She didn’t want him looking at her as though he cared. She couldn’t afford to let herself believe that he was interested in her. The only thing he was interested in was getting his own way!
She shot to her feet. ‘No, I didn’t hear you. I was too busy working out what I was going to say to you.’
‘And have you decided?’ he asked, his voice grating so that her hands clenched when she felt another rush of awareness hit her.
‘Yes.’
There was no way that she was prepared to give in to these feelings and let him gain the upper hand. She was in charge of this practice and she wouldn’t allow anyone to overrule her. Her job was all she had and the thought made her feel more mixed up than ever, only she couldn’t afford to let him know how painful the idea was. She looked him squarely in the eye because the best way she knew to resolve this problem was by meeting it head on.
‘You had no right to discuss me with anyone. I will not permit you to make personal remarks about the way I choose to live my life. If you cannot accept that then I’m afraid I shall have no choice other than to demand your resignation.’
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