Newborn on Her Doorstep. Ellie Darkins
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‘I’ll walk with you,’ he said as he caught Lily up.
The words were out of his mouth before he had a chance to stop them. However much he might wish he hadn’t stumbled on this little family drama, he had. He might be wrong, but gut instinct and not a little circumstantial evidence told him that this child had just been abandoned—which meant, of course, that both mother and baby could be in danger.
He tried to focus on practicalities, tried to put thoughts of what might have been had he and Lily met on any other sunny day out of his mind. He should call Kate. And maybe the police—they were the best people to ensure that the baby’s mother was safe and well. But he couldn’t ignore the fascination that he felt about Lily. There was an energy that seemed to pull him towards her and push him away at the same time—it had him curious, had him interested.
LILY EYED NIC, where he leaned against the wall by the door—a position he’d adopted almost as soon as they’d been shown into this room. He looked at the door often, as if reminding himself that it was there. That he could use it any time. So why was he still here?
Under normal circumstances she’d say that an attractive man, background-checked by her BFF, somewhat scantily clad, could involve himself in her life at any time he chose—as long as she had the option of checking out those long, lean thighs. But he really had killer timing.
She didn’t have time to ogle; she didn’t have time for his prying questions. All she could think about was her sister, Helen, and the baby, and what she needed to do to take care of both of them.
She paced the room, glancing over at the baby and wondering what on earth they were doing to her. Had they found something wrong? If everything was okay, surely someone would have told her by now. She hadn’t wanted to hand her over to the doctors, but she’d had no choice.
It was becoming a pattern, this letting go, this watching from afar. She’d lost her father before she was born, to nothing more dramatic than disinterest and a lost phone number. Her mother had died the year that Lily had turned thirteen, and it seemed her sister had been drifting further and further from her since that day. All she wanted was a family to take care of, to take care of her, and yet that seemed too much to ask from the universe.
And now someone had called the police, and her sister was going to be in more trouble than ever, pushed further from her. She tried not to think of the alternative. Of Helen out there needing help and not getting it. If it took the authorities getting involved to get her safe and well, then Lily was all for it.
She started pacing again, craning her neck each time she passed the baby to try and get a glimpse of what was happening.
‘Just a couple of tests,’ the doctor had said. How could that possibly take this long?
She glanced across at Nic, and then quickly away. How had she never met Kate’s brother before? Surely there should be some sort of declaration when you became best friends with someone about any seriously attractive siblings. He’d been abroad, she remembered Kate saying. He ran a charity that tried to improve conditions for child workers in factories in the developing world. He’d recently been headhunted by one of the big retailers that he’d campaigned against, and would be sitting on their board, in charge of cleaning up their supply chain. So attractive, humanitarian, and with a job in retail. There should definitely be a disclaimer for this sort of thing.
But there was something about him that made her nervous—some tension in his body and his voice that told her this man had secrets too: secrets that she couldn’t understand. It was telling her to stay away. That he was off-limits. A warning she didn’t need.
Nic came to stand beside her. ‘Try not to worry. I’m sure that everything is fine—they’re just being thorough.’
Lily bit her lip and nodded. She knew that he was right. He gestured her back to a seat and cleared his throat, giving her a rare direct look.
She continued pacing the room, waiting for news—until she heard a shriek, and then she was by the bed, her arms out, already reaching for the baby.
The doctor barely looked up from where he was pricking the little one’s heel with a needle.
‘I’m sorry, we’re not quite done.’
‘You’re hurting her!’
Lily scooped the baby into her arms as she wiped away the spot of blood from her foot and cooed soothing noises, gently rocking her. Back in Lily’s embrace, the baby stopped crying and nuzzled closer. Lily leaned over, instinctively shielding the baby from the doctor who had hurt her, until she felt the little body relax. She kissed the baby’s forehead, leaving her own face close for a moment, breathing in her baby smell. Once she was satisfied that she was calmed she looked up at the doctor, and instantly stiffened her resolve at the look of disapproval on his face.
‘I’m her aunt,’ she stated, as if that were explanation enough for everything. ‘Have you finished with the tests? It looks as if she’s had enough for now.’
She stared him down until he conceded that they had everything they needed. That was when she spotted Nic, looking grey and decidedly ill by the door.
‘When she cried out...’ he said. ‘I thought...’
Whatever he had thought had scared him witless, she realised, instinctively taking a step towards him.
‘She’s fine. We’re fine,’ she told him, in the same soothing tone she’d used with the baby. She turned her towards him. ‘Look, she’s settled now.’
He breathed a sigh of relief and Lily could almost see the adrenaline leaching from his body, leaving him limp and drawn. She met his eyes, looking for answers there, but instead saw only pain. An old pain, she guessed, one that had been lived with a long time and had become so familiar it was hardly noticed. Until something happened—a baby screamed—and it felt like new again.
For a moment she wished that she could soothe him as easily as she had the baby—smooth those creases from his face and the pain from his body. But something told her that taking this man in her arms would bring him anything but peace. She pressed herself back against the wall, trying to put whatever space she could between them.
‘Is everything okay?’ she asked.
‘Fine.’
Nic’s reply was terse, sharper than she’d expected, and she saw the fear and hurt in his expression being carefully shut down, stowed away.
‘I need to grab a cup of coffee. Do you want to find the canteen? We’ve been here for hours.’
And leave the baby alone with strangers? ‘I’m fine, thanks. I don’t want to leave her.’
He gave her a shrewd look. ‘I’ll go, then,’ he said, pushing himself away from the wall.
He looked better now, as he had in her front garden, all bronzed skin and taut muscles. No sign now of the man who had looked as if he might slide down the wall from fear.
When he returned with coffee and cake his manner was brisk and his eyes guarded. Goodå, Lily thought. Guarded is good. If we’re both being careful, both backing away slowly from whatever this energy between us is, then we’re safe.
‘I’ve got to go,’ he said. ‘I promised that I’d meet Kate and she’s not answering her phone so I can’t cancel. I don’t want to leave her stranded.’
And then he was off—out of their lives, and no doubt relieved to be so. She held in her heavy sigh until he’d slipped out of the door with her polite words of thanks.
KATE BURST THROUGH the door of the treatment room, wearing her air of drama queen as if it was this