Men Of Honour. Lori Foster
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that he’d make it so, Jett said, “You’ll learn how, I promise.”
“And then what?” She watched him in that curious way of hers, her gaze wary and hopeful at once. “I get used to your wonderful family, I get used to you, and then if things don’t work out…” She lifted her shoulders in question.
Back to square one, damn it. Jett squeezed the steering wheel. “I would never hurt you, Natalie.”
“Not on purpose, no. I believe that.” She sounded so reasonable, so detached that it made him nuts and made him want her. “I meant what I said, Jett. You’re wonderful. In so many ways.”
Because he knew she drew unfavorable comparisons, it put his teeth on edge. “You’re wonderful too, damn it.”
Instead of replying to that, she said, “The differences in our families are pretty stark.” She wadded up the garbage from their meal and stuffed it all into one bag. “I assume you know that already, being you’re a sleuth and all that.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “You’re on thin ice, lady. One more crack about me snooping—”
Her mood lightened at his feigned temper. “You did snoop!”
“Smartass.” He grinned at her. “I don’t know everything about you, not by a long shot. But even with what I do know, I’d still like to hear details from you.”
She sobered. “So…you don’t know about my mother?”
The new tension in her tone felt like a fist closing around his heart. “I know she died when you were young. That’s all.” He’d seen no reason to delve beyond that, seeing it as grave enough, awful enough, without added details.
Natalie sat silent for so long that Jett hurt for her. “I was nine the first time my mother tried to kill herself.”
Jett caught his breath on a wave of pain. How hard would that be for a sensitive little girl? “Damn, Natalie. I’m sorry.”
“She threw herself off a bridge. Twice, actually. The first time she failed because there was a rescue team doing drills in the river below her.” Natalie’s mouth twisted with pain and sarcasm. “Perfect timing, right? They fished her out, ruining her dramatic display.”
Oh God. “Honey…”
“I think she was pretty miserable. At least, that’s what Molly has always told me, that Mom didn’t hate us, but that she was an unhappy woman who didn’t know how to make herself happy.” She frowned a little. “Living with my father could make anyone miserable, I’m sure.”
He gave silent thanks she’d had Molly to help diffuse some of the hurt. Though her sister couldn’t have been much older herself, he knew they’d comforted each other.
When he finally got to meet her sister, he planned to give her a big hug of gratitude.
“But I don’t blame Dad entirely.” Natalie’s words were filled with contempt, but her expression was wounded. “I mean, if Mom did hate him so much, why would she leave her daughters with him, you know? Why didn’t she just divorce him and take us with her?”
“I don’t know.” Damn, he needed to get to a hotel so he could hold her. Highway lamps flickered on, and headlights barely cut through the growing darkness. The six-hour trip had turned into eight, and they needed to get settled, to eat real food, to stretch. “Everyone is different, baby. Some people aren’t as strong as others.”
“Molly thinks I’m strong. She always says that, so I guess she really believes it.”
“I’d agree.” It definitely took great inner strength to survive so much unhappiness and still have her tender heart and gentle understanding intact.
“Back when Mom died, Molly seemed so much older, and I really relied on her. But there’s only three years separating us.” She stared off into the distance. “She’s more than my sister. She’s my best friend, too.”
“I’m glad the two of you are so close.”
She didn’t seem to hear him. “After Mom jumped off that bridge, she spent a long time in a really exclusive hospital. You know the type, where you pay through the nose to be pampered, and they cater to your every wish.”
Jett didn’t know what to say, so he nodded.
“I hated visiting her there, especially since Dad would be the one to take us. The entire day would be ruined with friction, condescension and strained civility. At home, Mom and Dad barely talked, but while she was in the hospital he spent all his time telling her that she was being selfish and weak and that she’d embarrassed him.” Natalie laughed in that humorless, sad way again. “Nurses overheard him but said nothing since he was paying the bills, and that embarrassed me. It still embarrasses me.”
“It shouldn’t. Your parents are not you.”
“But that’s pretty much what my family is, you know? Awkward and ugly and cold.”
He understood now why she avoided talking about them. “That had to be hell on a kid.”
She drew a slow deep breath. “After Mom came home again, Molly kept saying that she’d be okay. I don’t know if she believed that or if she was just trying to protect me. Or maybe she wanted to convince herself.”
Jett had wanted her to open up to him, but now he almost couldn’t bear it. “She wasn’t okay.”
“Far from it. And regardless of what Molly had said, neither of us was real surprised when she took another jump off a bridge, this time over a highway.”
Jett cursed low.
“There was no fishing her out that time.” She stared down at her hands. “It was a gory, headline-worthy scandal, and that’s what Dad was mostly put out over. Not once did I see him cry or get emotional over any of it. I honestly don’t think any woman—or maybe even any person—has ever meant that much to him.”
Not even his daughters. The idea left Jett furious. “Parents should be there for their kids.”
She nodded. “Being a teacher, I see mostly good parents who really love their children. They’re not perfect and they make mistakes, but not because they don’t care—just because they’re human.”
“Making mistakes is the biggest part of being in a family. But when you love each other, a few mistakes are easily forgiven.” Even as he said it, he wondered about her relationship with her sister. “Have you and Molly had any differences?”
“I really despised Adrian.” She winced, as if guilty. “Molly said that I didn’t think anyone was good enough for her, but that’s not true. I want her to be happy, and if she’d married Adrian, I’d have made the best of it.”
“Sometimes people in love wear blinders.”
“That’s just it, though. Adrian was convenient, but I don’t think Molly really loved him.” Natalie waved a hand. “Anyway, it all worked out when Adrian finally showed his true colors. Molly dumped him, and she wasn’t all that broken up about it, so I say good riddance.”
“What about your stepmother? Do you both like her?”
“Kathi.” She wrinkled her nose. “She’s perfect for my father. And I have to give her credit for trying to make us into some sort of family, as impossible as that seems.”
Jett hated how she said that, as if she’d almost given up on the idea of family.
In the next second, his thoughts shattered as a semi tried to pass them and lost control. Everything happened fast.
Horns blared as the semi swerved across the lanes, forcing two cars to crash into each other as another slid wildly and almost hit them. Jett had just winged past that collision when another car fishtailed in front of him.
For a split