Welcome to Mills & Boon. Jennifer Rae
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appealing mouse. But I’d noticed it. And by the crease in his forehead, so had Jason. “Please excuse us while I take Diana upstairs.” His voice lingered wickedly on the word take. “In the meantime help yourselves to tea, or there’s drinks at the bar if you’d like something stronger.”
Edward pulled me out into the hall.
“I need something stronger,” I muttered.
“Hsst,” he said beneath his breath. Holding my hand, he drew me down the echoing flagstones of the dark hallway and up the sweeping stairs. It wasn’t until we were at my bedroom door that I stopped, looking at him with my brow creased.
“You made them think we were lovers.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because I felt like it.”
I swallowed, shaking my head. “I don’t understand.”
Edward’s eyes narrowed. “They were treating you so badly. Trying to guilt you into planning their wedding. Don’t worry, you’ll find a real boyfriend someday,” he mimicked Jason, then snorted with a flare of nostril. “Supercilious, condescending prats.”
An unwilling laugh burbled to my lips, then faded. “But maybe they were right,” I said softly, looking down. “I should have known he’d choose Madison over me. And I don’t have a boyfriend. I’m starting to think I’ll never—”
“Don’t be an idiot.” He put his hand against my cheek. “You could have any man you want, any time you want. If you don’t have one at the moment, it’s by your choice.”
I swallowed, looking up at him. “You’re being very kind, but...”
“I’m not kind.” He paused. “I just didn’t like them treating you as if you were invisible. As if you were nobody.”
“I am nobody,” I whispered.
Dropping his hand, he gave a low heartfelt curse. “For the last two months, you’ve matched me toe-to-toe, like a fighter. An equal. But the instant you walked into the library, you changed into a timid little mouse. What happened?”
“Why do you care?” I forced myself to meet his eyes. “You were running on the treadmill today, Edward. You don’t even need a physical therapist anymore.” I shook my head a little tearfully. “It’s time for me to—”
“Oh, no, you don’t,” he said furiously. “Don’t even think about using that as an excuse to run away. Why do I care? Because I don’t like to see the woman who regularly brings me to my knees—that’s you—falling apart at the feet of those vapid, self-absorbed idiots!”
“When did I bring you to your knees?” I said stupidly.
He looked down at me. “Have you already forgotten,” he said softly, “how just two hours ago, I took you in my arms and begged you to make love to me? I was putty in your hands.”
A shiver went over me, starting from my tingling, bruised lips. Tossing my head, I tried to laugh. “I don’t remember any begging—”
My sentence cut off as he pulled me abruptly into his arms. His fingertips stroked down my cheek, skimming lightly down my jaw, my neck. I trembled beneath his touch, feeling the warm caress of his breath, the heat of his powerful body against mine.
“This is how I beg,” he whispered, his lips close to mine, making me burn, making me lose my breath. Slowly, he kissed me, softly, so softly. “You’re strong, Diana. And brave.” His lips flickered like a whisper of breath against mine. “Why are you suddenly pretending not to be?” He moved back, and his expression changed, almost to a glare. “I want the woman I hired, the one who’s constantly trying to kick my ass. Bring her back.”
I licked my lips. “It’s hard...”
“No. It’s easy. Be your real self again, or get the hell out of my house.”
My lips parted in shock. It was funny. I’d been planning to leave Penryth Hall, talking myself into it. But the thought of Edward kicking me out suddenly felt unbearable.
“You’re firing me?” I said faintly. The way he looked at me made me shiver. My heart pounded, and my lips tingled in memory. “You don’t understand. Madison and I have a history. And Jason—” My voice stopped.
“You still love him?” His eyes grew hard. “You’re a fool. But that’s what love does,” he said grimly. “Makes us fools.”
Thinking of Jason, sitting next to Madison on the couch as he said patronizingly, If there’s no sex, there’s no relationship, I shook my head. “I don’t know what I feel anymore.”
“Whatever. Doesn’t matter. Pull yourself together. You’re better than this, Diana. And I’m not interested in watching you let them wipe their feet on you.” He glared at me. “Either stop acting like a doormat or you can ask them for a ride back to London.”
I stared up at him, feeling faint, assaulted on all sides. How I wished I could be the woman he described—the one who was brave and strong. But the thought of facing them and telling them what I really thought.... Jason...and Madison...
“I don’t think I can do it,” I choked out.
“You have twenty minutes to decide.” Edward’s jaw tightened. Turning away, he stopped at the bedroom door. “Take a shower. Brush your hair. Get on dry clothes. When you come back downstairs for dinner, I’ll see your answer.”
* * *
My legs were shaking as I came downstairs a half hour later. I’d taken my time in the shower, closing my eyes beneath the hot steam. I combed out my wet hair, then started to reach in the closet for my typical wardrobe of casual T-shirt and cargo pants. Then I stopped.
Instead, I took out a skirt and blouse, and black high-heeled shoes. I put on red lipstick, which I’d almost forgotten I owned, and a headband. Then I looked at myself in the mirror. It looked like me, but not me. It looked like the me that I used to be, in high school. Before Mom had gotten sick. Before Madison had taken the dream I’d wanted.
You’re strong, Diana. And brave. Why are you suddenly pretending not to be?
As I came downstairs, I could hear that the three of them had already started dinner without me in the medieval great hall. Well, Edward had told me twenty minutes. He was probably starting to wonder if I’d decided to pack for London.
I was still wondering myself.
I could play it safe, say nothing tonight and quietly leave with Madison, back to my old life. I could plan their wedding, be silently helpful and invisible.
Or—
Or I could be brave enough to be myself. And tell Jason and Madison how I really felt. Then I could remain at Penryth Hall—but I’d almost certainly end up in Edward’s bed.
Let him keep your heart. I will have your body. Very soon. And we both know it.
Yes. I swallowed. If I stayed here, it would happen. Sooner or later. Probably sooner. I wouldn’t be able to resist for much longer. I’d give my virginity to a playboy who wanted only a physical affair. It would be just sex, as he’d said.
Sex. And fire.
I felt dizzy just thinking of it.
So which would it be?
Remain invisible, mute and untouched?
Or risk everything, be honest and brave—but know that it would irrevocably change my life?
Standing outside the great hall, I still didn’t know. I was caught between longing and fear. But I was already late. Clutching my hands into fists, I took a deep breath and walked in.
Madison had appropriated