Just Once More.... Mira Lyn Kelly
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A few more ideas for the “wedding” got thrown around, including horizontally striped black-and-white bridesmaid dresses and “get out of jail free” seating cards, followed by a handful of jabs at Garrett for fooling around in the backseat of a car in a parking lot. And then the conversation shifted again and they were talking about Bethany’s upcoming trip to Disney with the family, and Maeve’s less entertaining travel plans for work.
And through it all Nichole sat somewhat shell-shocked by the ease with which they’d sailed through what she’d honestly expected to be the beginning of the end. Stunned to see her hand still the object of Garrett’s idle touch. Startled by the revelation that this man at her side had just given her yet another lesson in the art of not taking things too seriously.
A tension she hadn’t been aware of eased from her shoulders and spine, allowing her to relax back into her seat, her night and the incredible ride she was taking.
Garrett stayed the remainder of the evening, which lasted far beyond the last bite of crème brulée and through all the coffees and cappuccinos. He knew wedding talk—even in jest—was a hot button for Nichole. One that, when pushed, got her head spinning in all the directions neither of them needed it to go.
He didn’t want her to worry he was running off freaked out about the mere mention of the “M” word, and he didn’t want to give her the opportunity to go there herself. And once the conversation had moved on, he’d had a damn good time listening to the girls gabbing about their lives. Listening to talk spanning the spectrum from reality dating shows to mortgages to the rocky state of a mutual friend’s marriage. It reminded him of when they’d all still been under one roof and he’d been privy to every inane and profound thought to cross their minds. And it was even better tonight, because intermixed with the ringing laughter he’d been hearing his whole life were the rich notes of Nichole’s phenomenal laugh.
It was something he could definitely get used to, but if he wanted the chance, a little damage control was in order. And it started within a half-block of the restaurant as they walked down Randolph for some air before catching a cab.
Slanting a look at the woman tucked beneath his arm, he brought up the topic he knew had never fully left her thoughts. “That made you pretty uncomfortable tonight? The jokes about getting married?”
She glanced up at him, the relief in her eyes suggesting she’d been revving up to broach the subject herself. “It’s awkward. I mean, isn’t it awkward for you?”
It might have been if he wasn’t with someone he knew was on the same page. “It’s not a big deal. I mean, it’s just talk. From my sisters. I’m used to it. But then, I’ve never been engaged. So I’m probably not so sensitive as you are.”
There was a subtle tensing of her shoulders and Garrett knew he’d touched a nerve. “You don’t have to tell me about it if you don’t want to, but I’d like to know what happened.”
They continued to walk another quarter of a block in silence. Only a few cars were passing so late on a weeknight downtown.
“With Paul, I was really young and very stupid,” she started. “We’d been friends since grade school and started to date at fifteen. He was the nicest boy I knew and, because we were such good friends first, when we hit the next level … the relationship kind of took.”
Garrett nodded his understanding. Though he hadn’t done much legitimate dating in high school himself, he remembered what it had been like with his friends. Oftentimes there’d been an attraction and not much else, which meant a fair amount of turnover when it came to young love. But not so for Nichole.
Because in this, like in everything else, she’d been different. Ahead of the curve.
And she’d paid for it.
“A lot of girls sort of had that wandering-eye thing. New crushes every month or so. But I liked having something steady in my life. I liked Paul as much as I loved him, and pretty soon we were graduating, and we’d been together for three years, and we were going to the same college. Everyone thought it was so romantic and kept asking us about whether we were going to get married. I think maybe we simply got used to the idea. Like, Yeah, of course we will. We love each other. Why not?” She was shaking her head then, with a quiet laugh. “Of course, the why not answer should have been, we were basically kids. Only no one seemed to notice.”
Garrett couldn’t even imagine. “What about your parents? Didn’t they try to talk you out of it? I mean what were you? Eighteen?”
“His parents thought we were a great match. His mom told me how I was like the daughter she’d never had. And my mom. Sheesh.” She opened her mouth, tried to find the words and seemed to fail. Then, pulling a guilty face, she tried again. “My mom is wonderful, but her priorities … her sense … sometimes it’s not what it should be. She got pregnant with me when she was seventeen and my dad never married her. He basically took off when he found out about me and sent a check once or twice a year for a while. So in her book, me getting married—and to a guy she’d known forever, with us both so close at Marquette University—it was about the best news she’d ever heard.”
He’d known her father wasn’t around. But it wasn’t until this moment he understood the extent of that absence. No father. No brother. Just a mother who’d wanted a commitment for her girl even if she was too young to make one.
Clearing his throat, he prompted her for more. “But it didn’t work out?”
She shrugged. “Paul came to his senses about six months before the wedding. He was so apologetic. So genuinely sorry. He was looking around him, seeing everyone else in the world just starting their lives and figuring out who they were. What they wanted. And there we were, ready to call it done. He thought we both deserved a chance to figure ourselves out a little more. And deep down I knew he was right. So we called off the wedding and went our separate ways. He transferred to a school out east and I got on with my life.”
She didn’t seem bitter. But he knew from talking with Maeve—and from the hints he’d picked up from her, her heart had been badly abused.
“And you met someone else?”
The way her features tightened up told him this schmuck was someone he never wanted to meet. Contrary to popular belief, and with a very few exceptions, Garrett wasn’t generally a violent guy. But the pain that flashed across Nichole’s face had him wanting to do physical harm before he’d even heard the story.
“Joel was …” She let out a sigh. “He was a few years older. And when I met him he just struck me as so confident. Like he totally knew what he wanted—which appealed to me, I’m sure, for very obvious reasons.”
“You thought he’d be safe.” Garrett gave her shoulder a rub and then stopped to take her hand in his. He wanted to know what had happened. Wanted to see her face when she told him.
“I’d had a couple of years to lick my wounds over Paul, and when Joel finally asked me out I was excited to go. Ready for something new.” She slanted a glance at him. “Ready for my mother to stop with the heavy sighs every time I talked to her and the subtle nudges that I should apologize to Paul—”
“What?” he barked out, but she waved him off.
“For pressuring him, or letting him go, or whatever it was that day. Anyway, she was probably more excited than I was when things got serious with Joel. And I guess I didn’t have enough experience to see what was real and what wasn’t. Maybe I didn’t want to see it because I was so hungry to build myself the family I’d wanted as a kid. Or maybe my heart just didn’t have any breaks on it. Who knows? But it never should have gone as far as it did.”
Garrett listened, his temper escalating as Nichole tried to explain what had gone wrong. The actions and events she’d misinterpreted. The off-the-cuff remarks she’d taken to heart. She was trying to tell him what had happened with this chump had